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Listening. We need listening the most in our lives, but learn it the least! What is the difference between hearing and listening? Listening is like breathing, a natural effort. True? Research shows that we only achieve 25-50\% accuracy in the behaviors of others. True?.

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PowerPoint Slideshow about 'Listening' - declan


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Presentation Transcript
slide2
We need listening the most in our lives, but learn it the least!
  • What is the difference between hearing and listening?
  • Listening is like breathing, a natural effort. True?
  • Research shows that we only achieve 25-50% accuracy in the behaviors of others. True?
slide3
Components of listening:
  • Selecting – Choosing a sound that competes for your attention.
  • Attending/filtering – When do we “go nuts” with some noises? Dog barking?
  • Understanding – Syntactic and grammatical rules
  • Remembering – Why do we remember some things, but not others?
  • Responding – In which model of communication is listening most important?
  • What is the difference between external, physiological, and psychological noise?
listening problems
Information overload

Personal concerns

Rapid thought

External noise

Pseudolistening

Stage hog

Selective listening

Gap filling

Insulated listening

Ambushing

Defensive listening

Listening Problems
  • Passive listening

-lack of verbal response -when interjections are not appropriate

-when receiver is free to talk without interruption

10 worst listening habits nichols lewis 1954
Uninterested

Delivery versus content

Overstimulated mind

Only the facts!

Outline mania

10 Worst Listening Habits-Nichols & Lewis (1954)
  • Faking it
  • Easily Distracted
  • Too hard
  • Closed mind
  • Wasting thought speed
active listening listening for understanding
Counterfeit Questions!Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)
  • Questions (asking for specific information)
  • Questions that trap the sender
  • Questions that make statements
  • Questions that carry hidden agendas
  • Questions that seek correct answers
  • Questions based on unchecked assumptions
active listening listening for understanding1
Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Sincere questions:

  • Clarify meaning
  • Strive to learn about others’ thoughts, wants, needs
  • Are mostly open ended
active listening listening for understanding2
Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Paraphrasing (Mirroring Technique)

  • Factual Information
    • Active listener uses a questioning tone.
    • Clarify facts before offering a reaction.
  • Personal Information

-Underlying message, find the feelings involved.

-Think-feel-want

-What happens if you paraphrase too quickly?

active listening listening for understanding3
Four steps to empathic responses:

1. Understand your partner’s feelings

2. Ask questions

3. Reflect content by paraphrasing

4. Reflect feelings by paraphrasing

Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Empathizing

Lack of empathy:

  • Denying others the right to their feelings
  • Minimizing the significance of the situation
  • Offering unrequested advice
  • Passing judgment
  • Self-defending
  • Raining on the speaker’s parade (What is happening with us when we do this?)
active listening listening for understanding4
Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Directive responses:

  • receiver’s assessment of what the speaker just said; then state or imply what a receiver should do
  • supportive
  • agreement
  • offers to help
  • praise
  • diversion
  • putting things in perspective
active listening listening for understanding5
Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Analyzing:

  • Giving advice

Evaluating

  • i.e., work appraisals
    • Sometimes helpful, sometimes not
    • Sometimes solicited; sometimes unsolicited
    • Was this a requested analysis or evaluation?
active listening listening for understanding6
Active Listening (Listening for Understanding)

Informational Listening

  • Separating content from speaker.
  • Asking questions.
  • Reserving judgment.
final thoughts active listening
Final Thoughts: Active Listening
  • Beware of readily imposing ideas
  • Be “other oriented”
  • Mix active listening with other responses
  • Avoid phony responses
  • Be willing to take the proper time
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