Revising

1. Revising • "The difference between the right and the nearly right word is the same as that between lightning and the lightning bug."  – Mark Twain • "The beautiful part of writing is that you don't have to get it right the first time, unlike, say, a brain surgeon. You can always do it better, find the exact word, the apt phrase, the leaping simile."  – Robert Cormier

2. Read out loud • Add missing or misspelled words and anything else you notice

3. Pronouns – There should be no pronouns in this paper Circle: I, he, she, his, her, they, you, your, me, their, them, it

4. Commas – use commas to indicate a pause, a dependent clause, a list, a date, a state • Circle any incorrect usages of commas

5. Contractions – there are no contractions in a research paper, period. • Circle any and all contractions; it’ll, don’t, aren’t, won’t, can’t, shouldn’t, etc.

6. Capitalization Are proper nouns capitalized (names, dates, locations, titles)? Are common nouns and adjectives not capitalized?

7. Pronouns • Only one pronoun per paragraph

8. Writing without pronouns Fiaz was influenced in his writing by the gruesome experiences he endured in prison. Fiaz’s writing was influenced by gruesome experiences endured in prison.

9. Writing without pronouns However, after he had written this series of poems is when he started to really become recognized for his works of poetry... (John Ashbery) After the series of poems had been written, Ashbery became recognized publicly for poetry. After the series of poems had been written, Ashbery became publicly recognized. However, after this series of poems, Ashbery’s poetry became recognized.

10. Writing without pronouns He and Lydia had four children in their Concord house, unfortunately his oldest son died at age 5. Ralph and Lydia had four children in the Concord home, unfortunately the eldest son died at age five. In a Concord house that Emerson and Lydia called home, four children roamed about, until the eldest died at age five.