Week 13: Preparing for BA8

1. Week 13: Preparing for BA8 Revising Introductions

2. Updates • If your instructor comments recommend that you meet with me and/or visit the Writing Center, you should do it. • Very few of you have visited the Writing Center • Drop deadline has passed. You must revise if you want to improve your grade. • Office Hours tomorrow: 12PM-3PM • These will be my office hours from now until the end of the semester

3. Activity 1 • What were some of the grader comments and suggestions you received? • How are you planning to address those issues or follow those recommendations in your revisions? • More or less what you discussed in your BA7

4. Goals for today • Understanding the function and importance of introductions • Understanding what makes a good introduction • Begin revisions for your introductions

5. Reading 13 • St. Martin's Handbook: • Sections 4i, 4k-l, 5a-b, 5d-e, • "Revising Paragraphs Sentences, Words, and Tone," "Editing," "Proofreading the Final Draft"; • Part 8, Sections 40, 43, "Concise Writing,“ "Memorable Prose"

6. Next Week’s participation assignment • Next week we will be working with Sentence-level Revision. You will need to: • Participate in the poll in the homepage of the class website • You will need to choose three grammar points you want us to discuss next week. • You have until Sunday, Nov. 17 @ 5PM • Bring a printed & double-spaced copy of your latest version of your revised draft • We will use this for an in-class activity

7. Brief Assignment 8: Revising introductions • Instructions - Your completed assignment should contain the following: • A copy of your original introduction • Your revised introduction • A short summary and evaluation of your revisions, in which you identify and explain what you changed and why • The total length of the analysis should be 300-400 words, NOT including the original and revised conclusions. • See Assignment Post on Class Website for full details. • Due: Monday, November 18 @ 11:59 PM

8. Preparing for BA8 Introductions

9. Some Famous First Lines • “One morning, upon awakening from agitated dreams, GregorSamsa found himself, in his bed, transformed into a monstrous vermin.” –Franz Kafka, The Metamorphosis • "On the day they were going to kill him, Santiago Nasar got up at five-thirty in the morning to wait for the boat the bishop was coming on. He'd dreamed he was going through a grove of timber trees where a gentle drizzle was falling, and for an instant he was happy in his dream.“ – Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Chronicle of a Death Foretold

10. Famous First Lines (Cont.) • “It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.” — George Orwell, 1984 • “Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of captivity.” – MLK, I Have A Dream

11. Introductions • Establish tone, topic to be discussed, create an atmosphere, foreshadow important elements, etc. • Your introductions consist of three key parts • Context • Identifications • Thesis • The context section must be related the author’s main point • You will need to revise, not just edit, your introductions • Use graders’ comments to revise your introduction

12. Activity 2 • Last Week’s Draft & This Week’s Revision • Were changes made to your introduction? • What has been revised? • What can be improved? How? • Is the context section of your introduction related to the author’s main point? • Are the author’s main point, audience, and purpose identified? • Does the thesis contain the required elements? • Does your introduction set up a rhetorical analysis? • Circle and/or mark places that can be improved