Why Does This Kid Behave Like This and What Am I Supposed to Do About It?

1. Why Does This Kid Behave Like This and What Am I Supposed to Do About It? Presented by Martie Fox Educational Consultant, The Kelberman Center Oneonta City School District 9/27/12

2. Objectives • Gain an understanding that all behavior is a form of communication • Gain an awareness that some of the related factors that might factor impact student behavior • Learn ways in which your behaviors may be impacting student behaviors

3. Typical Problem Behaviors • Poor interpersonal skills • Swearing • Argumentative • “Attitude” • Little or no effort • Demanding “sameness” • Self Injury • Inappropriate Emotional Affect • Low frustration Tolerance • Aggression • Failure to Comply • Flicking, flapping • Substance Abuse • Odd Rituals • Resisting Assistance • Rude Comments • Noises

4. Functions of Behavior Seek Attention Positive or Negative Avoid or Escape Task, Person or Setting Access Tangible Obtain desired object Seek Sensory Stimulation Flap, spin, touch

5. What Might Impact These Functions? Developmental Disabilities Neurological Deficits Poor Communication Skills Social/Emotional Baggage Medical Issues Learning Disabilities ADHD, Asperger's, NVLD, Tourette’s Mental Illness Culture of Generational Poverty Skill, Motivation, Performance Deficits

6. Skills Deficits • Students may never have acquired the necessary skills to behave according to societal norms • Acting out may be the only means they know to get their needs met • As skills improve…… • Ability to communicate and have needs met improves • Inappropriate behaviors decrease

7. Executive Function Skills • Difficulty shifting from one mindset to another • Difficulty with time and sequencing • Disorganization • Difficulty initiating tasks • Difficulty considering the likely consequences of one’s actions (impulsive) • Difficulty considering solutions that have worked previously • Difficulty remaining calm enough to think

8. Language Processing Skills • Difficulty expressing thoughts in words • Appears not to have understood what was said • Requires significant time before responding to questions • Difficulty categorizing and labeling emotions • Difficulty communicating needs or problems • Poor language based problem-solving skills

9. Emotional Regulation Skills • Cranky, grouchy, grumpy, irritable • Fatigued, low energy • Anxious, nervous, worried

10. Cognitive Flexibility/Adaptability • Concrete, black-and-white, literal thinking and problem-solving • Insistence on sticking with rules, routines • Difficulty shifting from original thought or idea; possibly perseverative • Preference for predictability; does poorly with unpredictability, uncertainty, ambiguity • Seems oblivious to situational factors that would require adjustment in plan of action

11. Social Skills • Difficulty attending to appropriate social cues/appreciating social nuance • Inaccurate interpretation of social cues • Poor repertoire of social responses • Poor sense of how one’s behavior is affecting others • Poor or inaccurate self-perception • Inability to acknowledge or appreciate another’s perspective

12. Skill vs. Chronological Age If it looks like 2 year old behavior….. They may never have acquired/mastered the skills to move on to 3 year old behavior The Good News Skills can be directly taught Tip: Start where they are, not where they “should” be

13. Other Common Deficits PerformanceMotivation DeficitDeficit Has mastered the skill Has mastered the in isolation, but can’t skill across settings, reliably perform across but isn’t motivated settings to perform

14. Deficits can increase ANXIETY

15. Anxiety From What? Experiencing life as a…… series of random events. The student remains in a heightened state of tension and alertness, not knowing what might happen next.

16. Common PDD Traits That Exacerbate the Problem • Difficulty relaying and/or interpreting events accurately • Difficulty adapting to change • Limited ability to self soothe • Limited expressive language to tell us what they are thinking & feeling • Inappropriate affect may cause adults to misread intent • Limited receptive language skills to make sense of the words spoken to them • Limited ability to read non-verbals may cause student to misinterpret adult’s intent

17. Life as a Series of Random Events • Imagine that you’re the rat in a “shock box”, a walled-in floor with a center line dividing the two halves. • When shocked, you will move across the center line of the box to the other side. You’re certainly “on edge” and wary after this event, but your coping strategies allow you to escape punishment and continue functioning well. • Now imagine that an electrical shock is suddenly and periodically administered to your new side. Sometimes you can escape to the other side of the box. At other times, the other side is also electrified.

18. What Might Happen Develop odd rituals Withdraw just like some rats that give up trying to figure out the system, we might lie down, and endure the pain Strike out because we’re tense, afraid, and unsure of intentions…especially when persons react differently at different times

19. Rats & Other Mammals (Like Us) • “Odd” reactions are best understood as an expression of the “fight-or-flight” dynamic in the face of a threatening situation (real or imagined). • Inconsistent environments create confusion and anxiety which lead to: • Agitation • Aggression • Ritualistic behavior & other ways to withdraw from the “real world”.

20. Unlike typically developing youth, our students’ brains are unable to: • Organize the world effectively • Learn quickly from experiences • Recognize repeating patterns in life • Life seems uncertain & unpredictable • Unstructured environments, and adults who are “emotionally unpredictable”, add to students’ problems with organization. • Stress develops from being unsure of what will happen next & defenses against the building anxiety are employed.

21. Theory of Mindtaking misinterpretation to the next level If I knew I wanted to be on the red team then you should have known I wanted to be on the red team And, since you didn’t put me on the red team……. you must have purposefully intended to disregard me

22. How does OUR behavior impact communication and behavior ?

23. Read My Face, My Tone, My Lips Facial Expression + Tone of Voice + Words (55%) (38%) (7%) Blah, blah, blah

24. The Conflict Cycle 1 STRESSFUL INCIDENT 2 STUDENT’S FEELINGS 4 ADULT/PEER REACTION 3 STUDENT’S OBSERVABLE BEHAVIOR Student’s ATTITUDE affects student’s behavior Student’s BEHAVIOR affects teacher’s attitude Teacher’s ATTITUDE affects teacher’s behavior Teacher’s BEHAVIOR affects student’s attitude

25. Behavioral Strategies that Enhance Communication Isolate the youth and conversation demonstrates respect and decreases sensory stimuli Explore the youth’s perspective: What do you think just happened? Model problem solving using words Utilize Reflective Listening Summarize his/her feelings for him/her; be calm, assertive, respectful. It sounds like what you are saying is…

26. Connect the behavior to feelings How did that make you feel? Discuss alternative options What else can you do if you feel this way again? Prepare the student to reenter the ongoing activity and/or setting Preview what will happen next

27. Social Autopsy • What just happened? • What was the social error? • What do you need to do right now to correct the error? • What do you need to do differently next time? • ROLE PLAY

28. General Strategies • Meet them where they are instead of where you think they should be • Teach as opposed to tell • Think, what would motivate my student to comply • Directly Teach the Obvious This is especially important for social skills acquisition • TALK LESS – demonstrating more • Allow extra time for processing • Provide choices but control option: this or that, now or later • Don’t tell them what they can’t do without telling them what they can do • Utilize reflective listening

29. Frequently and consistently deliver logical consequences and rewards • Use self monitoring and tie it to rewards On a scale of 1-10, how do you think you did? 10 points might equal ten tickets, 10 GI Joe men, etc. • Preview upcoming activities and discuss/remind what the expectation look like • Show examples of the finished product so they can understand the expectations • Use hurdle to help to get them started • Be honest and specific with praise • Proximity, proximity, proximity

30. We all want the same thing: Respect CaringTO BE HEARD Someone who will speak calmly and use a kind and moderate tone Someone with a good sense of humor FOR OTHERS TO BE IN A GOOD MOOD

31. How we define a behavior determines how we react to the behavior Keep an Open Mind The End