Welcome to FAMILY ASSET BUILDING: Tools to Prevent Problem Behaviors !

1. Welcome to FAMILY ASSET BUILDING: Tools to Prevent Problem Behaviors! By: Kathleen Hassenfratz, LPC Healthy Lifestyles Coordinator, 533-6041

2. Points to Ponder • 40,000 Americans are injured in the bathroom each year • The average computer user blinks 7 times/minute • Apples, not caffeine, are a more efficient way of waking up in the morning • A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 years • The average age of a first time smoker is 12 • The average age of the first experimentation with alcohol is 10 • Of over 200,00 students surveyed in grades 6-12, only 30% reported knowing how to plan ahead and make healthy choices.

3. Quick Interview • Take a minute and interview your neighbor, asking: • When you were in school, how did you know that you were valued, supported, and/or seen as a resource? • When you were in school, what kinds of ‘problems’ were surrounding you and/or your peers?

4. It’s Different Today! • We know more (brain theory) • We can access more (social media) • They are exposed to more…earlier (media) • Their bodies change earlier (toxins, etc. creating early onset of puberty) • Others?

5. Healthy Lifestyles Program • In order to focus on kids’, staff and community health , LTISD established the Health Lifestyles Program in 2005. • As an overseeing body of health programming, its charge is to integrate and synthesize all of the community's and district's programs into a cohesive unit to benefit the health, character development, and lifestyle choices of all students, or what is referred to as Coordinated School Health (SB19) • Underlying the CSH, is a framework called: "The Developmental Assets Approach" established by The Search Institute** **For more information, see their website at www.search-institute.org.

6. Developmental Assets Framework • There are 40 building blocks for the development of youth. • Assets build protective factors which ensure academic success & the reduction of risky behavior. • The asset framework facilitates the integration of climate, relationships, boundaries, social competencies and values into academic achievement. • Asset rich programs, strategies and activities serve as the basis for prevention.

7. Power of Assets: PROMOTING Positive Behaviors and Attitudes

8. Power of Assets: PROTECTING Youth from High Risk Behaviors

9. Eight Components of CSH

10. WHEN?…timing is EVERYTHING! • Watching shows together that depict drugs, sex, bullying, lying, stealing, etc. • Child and friend giggling in bedroom; find them looking at a naked woman in a magazine • Post Office FBI posters • Seeing 2 men/women holding hands at the mall • Doing laundry, you find a condom in your teen’s pocket • Driving in the car….

11. Keys for Teachable Moments • Stay Calm • LISTEN to your child first; do not interrupt • Find out what your child already knows • Give factual information • If you share your values, explain WHY you have your values • It’s okay to say, “I don’t’ know’, but forget to follow up

12. More Do’s & Don’ts for KIDS(con’t gr. 3-12) • Do learn how to say NO creatively: Use Humor (‘Forget it! I”d rather play on a highway; it would be safer!) Say NO and give a reason (cigarette smoke makes my breath stink) Apply pressure yourself (No, and I thought you were smarter than that!) Always have an ‘out’ (No, sorry, I can’t stick around; I promised my sister we’d go to a movie.)

13. Do’s for Kiddos (ages 3-6) • Describe what makes you happy, sad, silly, mad • Keep track of snacks… how many are healthful? Create your own snack recipe’ book • Plant seeds, nurture them and watch them grow • Turn on some music and dance; list all the ways you exercise your muscles • Be the leader in your family; check the weather each morning and show what you plan to wear • Describe what makes a good leader; are there any leaders in your life? Who? Why? • Describe what makes a good friend; are you a good friend to others?

14. FAMILY’S ROLE CONTINUED: The Parent’s Do’s and Don’ts • Do have clear expectations of behavior and communicate them (ie., can make some of this a family decision through ‘pow wows’) • Do have shared family responsibilities (contribution makes kids feel worthwhile) • Do Share yourself; share values, beliefs and plans • Do communicate the NO USE message; stay aware of new drugs/new ways to impact kids by reading; practice what you preach • Do have designated time for family fun, values, pride (1:1, family time, community time) • Dowalk the walk; show how to handle stress and solve problems • Do monitor your children: get to know their friends, other parents, where they’re going, who they’ll be with, and set up regular check in times

15. Parent’s Do’s and Don’ts Con’t. • Don’t use excessively authoritarian or permissive behavior (ie., drill sergeant and helicopter) • Don’t avoid topics that make you squeam (ie., drugs, alcohol, odd friends, changing appearance, etc.) • Don’t judge all the time; instead DESCRIBE (ie., name the quality…. “that takes ___________________.” • Don’t forget you’re HUMAN and can make mistakes when parenting; just don’t give up! • DO remember to intentionally build the strengths of your child (see Daily Checklist.)

16. Preparing for the Transition • Introduce study skill techniques NOW (i.e., where to sit in class, how to copy notes, setting a ‘study time’.) • Watch what YOU say (i.e., if you never like homework, they may pick up on your ‘tone’.) • Directly teach AND practice refusal skills (i.e., cheating, stealing, peer pressure.) • Directly teach AND practice assertiveness skills (ways to stand up for yourself if teased and how to get help if needed.) • Meet their friends and their friends’ PARENTS • The Mall is not a safehang out spot without parents (neither are movie theaters.) • Monitor their computer time, games, emails, etc. • READ books for parenting a pre-teen (see attached reading list.)

17. The Wrap UP!! • Children are exposed to outside influences use even when they are very young. • What you say and do every day can affect your children’s future attitudes about life, food, friends, and school, and how they interact with family members and others • Now is the time to help your children form healthy habits, attitudes and relationships!! REMBEMBER: Talking and Listening Take Time Rules Role Model Peer Acceptance Monitor Activities