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Wordiness. An introduction to wordy words for the presentation slideshow that gives the detailed description on how to avoid unnecessary redundant words and or modifiers. . Pages 220-228. Don’t use double words that work in pairs from one another.

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Wordiness

An introduction to wordy words for the presentation slideshow that gives the detailed description on how to avoid unnecessary redundant words and or modifiers.

Pages 220-228

eliminating redundancy

Don’t use double words that work in pairs from one another.

Don’t use redundant modifiers that repeat all or part of the meaning of other words in a sentence.

Your language is redundant when you use words or phrases that unnecessarily repeat towards in the sentence.

Eliminating Redundancy
redundancy examples

Double words

Redundant: The evil and nasty villain in the black coat knocked the tasty and delicious ice cream out of the crying child's hand.

Concise: The devious villain in the black coat knocked the chocolate ice cream out of the crying child's hand.

Redundant Modifiers

Redundant: A farmer growing pumpkins must be aware of these things. Pumpkins are orange in color, must have a smooth surface in touch, and must weigh about 10-20 pounds in weight.

Concise: A farmer growing pumpkins must be aware of these things. Pumpkins are orange, must have a smooth surface, and must weigh about 10-20 pounds.

Redundancy examples
common redundancy
Common redundancy

Double Words

Advice and counsel

Agreeable and satisfactory

Any and all

Assist and help

Basic and fundamental

Due and payable

Each and every

Fair and equitable

Fair and reasonable

Full and complete

Help and benefit

Hope and trust

Null and void

Opinion and belief

True and accurate

Redundant modifiers

Use these concise alternatives

Instead of these words……

Absolutely essential

Absolutely free

Circle around

Continue on

Decrease down

End result

Free gift

Future plans

Mail out

Past history

Past memories

Repeat again

Essential

Free

Circle

Continue

Decrease

Result

Gift

Plans

Mail

History

Memories

repeat

eliminating unnecessary words

Readers want to read technical documents as quickly as possible.

    • So eliminate any words not necessary to convey your message.
  • For instance, instead of stating “have the ability to,” “have the capability to,” “has the capacity for,” or “has the opportunity to,” state “can.”
Eliminating Unnecessary Words
eliminating examples

Sample:

    • Wordy:It should be pointed out that there are three candidates whom our organization without further delay will endorse, despite the fact that we are not in a position to contribute any money to their campaigns.
    • Concise: Our organization will now endorse three candidates although we cannot contribute any money to their campaigns.
Eliminating examples
commonly used phrases that you can usually delete

as a matter of fact

I believe

I hope

in my opinion

in other words

I should point out that

I think

it is essential

it is evident

Commonly Used Phrases that You Can Usually Delete
  • It is interesting to note that
  • It should be noted that
  • Thanking you in advance
  • The fact that
  • There are
  • There is
  • To the extent that
use simple words

When you want to impress your reader, resist the temptation to use words that you don’t normally use.

    • Words that you rarely use when talking
  • Your readers will prefer words that are more familiar.
Use simple words
simple words examples

Less-familiar words

    • Pursuant to our conversation on December 15.
    • Your firm’s response purports to explain why you deviated from the grant guidelines.
    • The accounting office will endeavor to procure our compensationchecks.
  • Simple, familiar words
    • As we discussed on December 15.
    • Your firm attempts to explain why you deviated from the grant guidelines.
    • The accounting office willtrytofindour paychecks.
Simple words examples
commonly used fancy words

“Fancy” words

    • Accumulate
    • Apparent
    • Ascertain
    • Cognizant
    • Commence
    • Commitment
    • Deem
    • Endeavor
    • Facilitate
    • Herewith is
    • Indebtedness
    • Initiate
    • Locality
    • Optimum
    • Proceed
    • Procure
    • Pursuant to
    • Subsequent to
    • Sufficient
    • Terminate
    • utilize
Commonly used “fancy” words
  • Simple Words
    • Gather
    • Clear
    • Learn, find out
    • Know
    • Begin, start
    • Promise
    • Consider
    • Try
    • Help, ease
    • Here is
    • Debt
    • Begin
    • Place
    • Best, most
    • Go
    • Buy, get
    • As
    • After, next, later
    • Enough
    • End
    • Use
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Although the average egg looks innocent enough, it can harbor dangerous food borne bacteria. Salmonella enteritis is the bacteria that can invade eggs in several ways. It is not passed hen to hen but usually from rodent droppings to chickens. Egg shells can be contaminated by fecal matter. It comes from the intestines and feces of infected animals including chickens. It can be passed to the egg shell when the chickens sit on the eggs. Salmonellosis (an infection caused by salmonella bacteria) can also be passed to eggs when the ovaries of chickens silently harbor the salmonella bacteria. Then, the eggs are contaminated while inside the chicken, before the shells are even formed. Because of the recent alarm about egg recalls, the public has learned that USDA inspectors don’t check hen houses or look into farms’ salmonella prevention programs, such as inoculation. Recent inspections of egg farms have brought attention to the numerous rodent holes in the chicken farms. Rodent holes are a sign that mice have entered the buildings and infecting hens with salmonella. Eggs are washed and disinfected to deal with the dirt and germs on the shells. Many farmers inoculate the hens, but salmonella contamination in eggs is not prevented entirely by this method.

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Eggs can harbor dangerous food borne bacteria such as salmonella. Salmonella forms in the intestines and feces of infected animals including chickens. Salmonellosis (an infection caused by salmonella) can contaminate eggs when the egg shell comes in contact with the fecal matter of rodents and chickens. It can also be passed to eggs inside the ovaries of an infected chicken before the shell is formed. The public has been made aware of inspections by the USDA due to recent egg recalls. USDA inspectors do not check hen houses, or the farms’ salmonella prevention programs such as inoculations. Egg inspections have brought attention to numerous rodent holes on the farms. Farmers prevent most contamination by washing and disinfecting eggs, as well as inoculating the hens.

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