HUNGARY : Ignorant state, cooperative civil sector

1. HUNGARY:Ignorant state, cooperative civil sector Bea Sándor & Ráhel K. Turai Háttér Society

2. Háttér Society Since 1995 Helpline since 1996 Legal aid service, HIV/AIDS program, Archives, Community organizing

3. LGBTQ Rights in Hungary: homophobic attitudes & relatively progressive legislation • the institution of registered partnership; • Act CXXV of 2003 on equal treatment and the promotion of equal opportunities prohibits discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity, but very few victims turn to either a court or the Equal Treatment Authority for legal remedies; • LGBTQI people have to cope with a homophobic and transphobic atmosphere in the workplace on a daily basis (research by Háttér in progress);

4. • adoption:same-sex couples not entitled; individuals are entitled to adopt children regardless of their sexual orientation / gender identity (the children adopted will have only one legally recognized parent); • access to artificial insemination: regulated by discriminatory measures: only spouses, heterosexual partners, or single women (who are infertile or may soon become infertile because of their age) can apply;

5. • discrimination based on SOGI as well as denying services from HIV-positive patients is prohibitedin health care (Act CXXV of 2003 on equal treatment and the promotion of equal opportunities); still, a recent research conducted by Háttér reveals that coming out is risky in the sector; • trans people’s experiences: many avoid seeing doctors because of their fear of discrimination (special needs ignored, unnecessary intimate inquiries); Despite thelegal acknowledgement of gender transition.

6. Domestic and dating violence in law • “Partnership violence” penalized in the Penal Code; • Partners include: present or former spouses / cohabiting partners / registered partners who lived or had lived together with the perpetrator. • 2009 Act: “preventive restraining order” – does not specify gendereither. • Restraining order in case a penal procedure is under way (1998); this regulation is also gender-neutral. • Police: very careful to hand out preventive restraining orders. • Courts: an even more serious problem. • High latency • Very few shelters

7. The existing legal regulations and especially their actual application seem inadequate to offer victims of domestic violence a real chance to leave an abusive relationship and get help from institutions.

8. Dating violence: Covered by the regulations penalizing sexual violence in its various forms. The regulations pertaining to sexual assault and abuse in the Penal Code are gender neutral: both the perpetrator and the victim can be of any gender. Amnesty International Hungary report (2007): a key barrier to women in trying to obtain justice for rape and other crimes of sexual violence is the high rate of attrition in such cases. Victim or other witnesses may decide to withdraw their statements or not to press charges. Police may not identify the attacker. Police, prosecutors or judges may decide there is not enough evidence. Case may be labeled a “false report.”

9. Fieldwork received openness and interest Consulting with: NANE– NGO working against gender-based violence; guides, helpline, cooperation with Háttér helpline – good practices State-run services for survivors (ignorant and not sensitized) Transvanilla and Transzpont transgender organizations Experts: social workers, police officers, psychological counsellors, activists for sex workers (good practices on the individual level)

10. Distribution Workshop at annual Budapest Pride Festival on abusive same-sex relationships Round table about LGBTQ support services at the Sziget Festival Radio interviews in feminist and LGBTQ programs of Tilos Rádió Distribution of flyers at LIFT Lesbian Identities Festival

11. Questionnaires 2 online questionnaires: partnership violence between women partnership violence against trans women distributed through LGBTQ groups and in the workshop (not representative) items of forms of abuse listed + space for stories + contacts for interview 61 fully completed responses from women in same-sex relationships (2% transgender) (started: 108) 10 fully completed responses from trans women (started: 27)

12. Questionnaires Betweenwomen: • Identities:56% lesbian or gay, 10% bisexual, 10% other non-heterosexual (queer, pansexual), 6% heterosexual, (18% did not identify) • Items: • alltypesidentified (humiliation, suicidethreats, battering, sexualassault (12%)); • most widespread: fear and anxiety; signs of extreme jealousy in their partner (more than a thirdexperienced): • 1/4 knows more than 1 womanlivinginabusivesame-sexrelationship

13. Questionnaires Transwomen: • Identities: 7 heterosexual (a quarter of the 20 responding), 6 lesbian or gay, 5 bisexual, queer, or unlabelled, 2 asexual • Genderof abusers: 6 men, 4 women, 2 both (out of 12 responding) • Items: • more abuse in each category than women in same-sex relationships • esp. physicalviolence, economicviolence (partner of 42% controlled access to a shared bank account) • trans-specific forms:referred to as male; their bodies shamefully mocked (1/3)

14. Interviews: Lesbian relationships 5 face-to-face interviews, 23-49 (youngest at abuse 16) 4 shorter telephone/Skype interviews with older lesbians Forms of violence: controlling behavior : checking phone-, email- and Facebook messages, isolation from friends, family and community; verbal forms of violence: scenes of jealousy, outbursts of anger, humiliation.

15. InterviewsLesbian relationships „She wouldn’t let me call my parents or ask for help from anyone. …Once she found out that I had called my dad – because I had planned to send my kids there … so that they stay there and then I can also go somehow. And she found out that I had called my dad. We were in the street, it was already dark, there was no one there but us, and she pushed me against the wall. I wanted to leave but she didn’t let me go. And she was holding me tight, pushed me against the wall of the store, and completely scared me, grabbed my body parts, and I didn’t know how to escape. She was holding me in such a fear (...) that I pissed myself, for the first and last time in my life.” (Adél, 42)

16. InterviewsLesbian relationships specificities connected to the social attitudes towards homosexuality: limit one’s opportunities when looking for help among family, friends and institutions (homophobia as a resource for the controlling abuser) coming out/outing as a means of control norm of having a partner & being newly out: vulnerabilities. majority of our respondentsentering their first (lesbian) relationship a forum about violence against women, 2014: a lesbian group onlyabout homophobia, ignoring the phenomenon even after being called on

17. InterviewsLesbian relationships homo- and biphobia inside the relationship: „She had been telling me that she wouldn’t believe I was a lesbian and asked how I could know that if I hadn’t kissed a guy. She said she was worried I would leave her if I eventually realized I was interested in guys. She forced me to kiss with a guy at a party. It was horrible. And then she flipped out and said she wasn’t serious and why I had done that and what a whore I was. (…) After about one and a half years she made me sleep with her. She bought a lot of shots and it happened. And immediately afterwards she said she hadn’t thought I would let myself be seduced, I am a bitch, I am a whore, and what a cripple I was to have my first experience with a girl.” (Lizi, 23)

18. InterviewsLesbian relationships What helped: awareness-raising materials and the events of NANE in particular support services (of Háttér) friends as reflective and supportive

19. InterviewsTrans women’s relationships difficult access to respondents • 1 survivor in longer, semi-structured, face-to-faceinterview • 1 survivor interviewed via phone and wrote her story in the questionnaire • 1 trans activist via Skype • 1 bisexual and 1 heterosexual woman who did not suffer violence • 3 sex workers contacted via phone (+ others :) stories about others • 2 drag queens from the older generation, online and via phone

20. InterviewsTrans women’s relationships trans-specific forms of violence: • obstruction of transition (hiding hormones) • disrespect of certain body parts (forcing oral stimulation) • Vulnerabilities: • dating and at the beginning of a relationship when they reveal their trans status to a cis man • isolation from friends, family, LGBTQ communities, institutional help

21. InterviewsTrans women’s relationships Trans sex workerwomen: some more independentthanciswomen, (perceived) physicalstrength and mimicri • of disadvataged Roma minority • formerdragqueens: economicnecessityafterthegoldenage of dragshowstillthe 2000’s • collectingfor sex reassignmentsurgeries Violenceattributedtogender and/or sexual performance (to maintain a feminine look and a potent penis) Szabina, 35 (psychiatry and police): • Client: took the phone and other valuables, threatening her at knife-point. • Male partner: took the money she earned in bars and from sex work, and wanted to build his own business from it.

22. Recommendations Results show victims need to break out from abusive relationship: emotional support from their confidants awareness of the phenomenon •LGBTQI NGOs should train their members and the public about same-sex intimate partner violence and define this issue as a focus when outlining the tasks of their support services; •Women’s rights NGOs working on the issue of domestic violence should explicitly include lesbian and trans women in their constituency and clients;

23. •State authorities and the justice system should treat all victims of violence (be it domestic or other violence) as equal, respecting their reality and fulfilling and protecting their rights; to this end, LGBTQI-sensitive training and data-treatment is necessary; •Social workers should be trained to deal with victims of domestic violence regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity.

24. Thankyouforyourattention! Feel free to contact us: Háttér Society: en.hatter.hu hatter@hatter.hu Bea Sándor, legal expert: sandor.bea@hatter.hu Katalin Ráhel Turai, Gender Studies PhD candidate: turai.katalin@hatter.hu