NEGOTIATION TACTICS. SILENCE and THINKING TIME Prepared by; Muhammed VURAL M.Mahmut YILMAZ Ozan ÜNLÜ Erkan MURATHAN Hilal KOCAMAZ. What is Silence?. “ Have more than you showest, s peak less than you knowest. ” ~ Shakespeare Definition of silence:
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SILENCE and THINKING TIME
“Have more than you showest, speak less than you knowest.”
Definition of silence:
The condition of being or keeping still and silent.
The absence of sound; stillness.
A period of time without speech or noise.
Refusal or failure to speak out.
Silence is the absence of mention. In other words, a negotiator using
this tactic does not say anything about a negotiation point. When
used as a tactic in a negotiation, silence can keep the you or the
other party off-balance.
1) Silence is generally used when negotiators do not want to disclose weaknesses in their position.
“If I listen, I have the advantage; if I speak, others have it.” ~ From The Arabic
2) When negotiators want to obtain information by letting the other party do the talking. Silence gives you the powerful opportunity to observe and learn.We have two ears and one tongue in order that we may hear more and speak less.~ Diogenes
3) When the other party is talking:If you interrupt, it irritates the speaker.To every thing there is a season...a time to keep silence, a time to speak.~ Ecclesiastes
4)When we want to make the other party uncertain and impulsive 5) When other party’s message does not include any mean or importance for you.
The ambiguity of silence can cause different reactions:the parties involved might change the subject,previously hidden positions/goals might be revealed or new options might be discussed. Within such a context, the consideration of cultural differences is crucial; experience has shown that people from various cultural backgrounds react very differently to silence:
For example: If there is silence
Silence is a natural part of anycommunicationprocess.
Silence comes in three forms.
1-Pausing:The tricky thing about a silence contest initiated by the other side is that they don’t announce, "OK, I'm going to start a silence contest." It's just that they say something or ask a question and then there is silence.
2-Slowing Down: Go slowly and leave lots of gaps for the other side to rush into.
Being patient, talking less, and waiting are often the keys to a miracle. Your silence allows the other party to express their ideas which will not only make them feel as though they are being taken seriously, but will also give you time to get an overall grasp on the situation. When negotiating, stamina and endurance usually count the most
3-Waiting To Speak Last:Concentrate on the other party's body language. Always listen until the other party has finished their last word rather than starting to think about your own counter argument as soon as they begin talking.
1. Allowing silence in a conversation puts pressure on the other person.
2. Silence can indicate profoundness, such as awe or horror.
3. Silence can indicate respect.
4. Silence can indicate contemplation.
5. Silence can be the creation of a listening space.
6. Silence can be an indication of empathy.
7.Silence provides time to consider the actual situation.
8. Once somebody knows you’re hot to trot, he’ll exploit it.
9. Silence promotes anxiety and uncertainty in your counterparts, and that’s good for you.
10. Silence says you have other options, you don’t NEED this deal, or else. Always, a person with options is more attractive and powerful to a suitor.
11. Silence will determine just how serious they are. Will they communicate again, and how long will it take? If they can wait, they’re smart, and they’ll be turning the tables on you.
1.Silence can indicate hostility. Withdrawing, “stonewalling,” and pouting in silence are ways some people handle anger. Such a silence can be pulsating with bad feelings and elicit anger on the part of the other person.
2. Silence can indicate disagreement.While it’s almost never an indication of indifference, silence can indicate that the other person is having negative emotions.
3. Silence can be intentional rudeness.Because of the nature of normal conversation allowing an extended silence can be perceived as rudeness.
Use silence but also plan what you will do if it isused on you! We can:
1.) Accept Silence: It's just that they say something or ask a question and then there is silence. When the other side has started a silence contest, we usually go into denial. We might say something like, "now that I've had a chance to think about that", or "well, that's an interesting idea and here is what I propose," or something like that. It sends the message that we just had a thoughtful moment rather than a silence
We can fill a void by:
This tactic has taken
Once you have named the game and forestalled your immediate reaction, the next step is to buy yourself time to think – time to go the balcony.
There are several ways to taking time to think:
When dealing with adversarial people it is important therefore not to react to their behavior.In order not to react it may be necessary to distance yourself from your emotions. Ury popularized this concept by describing it as " going to the balcony."
In going to the balcony it is necessary to be able to identify or name unfair tactics that you are likely to confront in dealing with adversarial people.
People can use the following three tactics to sway the negotiations in their favor:
Inflexibility: They refuse to negotiate further becoming inflexible. They want you to feel trapped and to believe there is no other way but their way.
It is possible to misunderstand others’ behavior. It becomes critical, therefore, not jump to conclusions when observing behavior but to keep a mental record of what is being said
and done. Adversarial people tend to use more than one tactic.
Advantages of going to balcony.
To review written or an oral proposal
To devolope or formulate response
To regain your composure
One way to refrain from reacting is to ‘’take a time out’’.
Especially If the parties become angry, they should take a break. They should make their dissatisfaction known and openly discuss the reasons for it.
Negotiations are more productive when they are broken up by frequent time-outs
Simply take a break or tell a story to reduce the tension. Finally, never make decisions in the heat of the moment. Instead, make it a point to go the balcony and make your decisions there.
The simplest way to buy time to think in the middle of a tense negotiation is to pause and say nothing. It does you little good to respond when you are feeling angry or frustrated
Pausing will not only give you a chance to step up to the balcony seconds, but it may also help the other side cool down.
Means:Slowing down the conversation by planning it back.
It use to buy more time to think.
By rewinding the tape-which interrupts the routine slows it down-you give yourself time to recognize the tricks and neutralize its impact.
An easy way to slow down the negotiation is to take careful notes.
Writing down what your counterpart says gives you a good excuse:”I’m sorry, I missed that. Could you repeat it?”
Recess should always be taken when:
Some complicated calculations have to be done
The emotional temprature is rising
You are negotiating as a member of a group
Negotiator’s equivalent of atime-out. You agree to terminate the current negotiating session
You need a break to:
Think about what has been said
Reconsider your position
Regroup your team
Consult with your advisers more senior decision makers
Rest and recuperate.
The suggestions that follow are effective.
1. Get the other party to present their position before breaking for the day.
2. Arrange to get an important surprise visitor or phone call at some crucial point.
3. Take a restroom break.
4. Get thirsty or hungry.
5. Change a member of the negotiating team.
6.Don't have the back-up evidence available.
7. Plead ignorance. Ask for time to learn more about it.
8. Have your expert unavailable.
9. Load down the other party with documents, data, or drawings.
10. Use an interpreter or third party.Interpreters can be technical people, lawyers, your boss, or translators. In any case, they can slow things down.
11. If you are on a team, develop rules among your people on how questions will be fielded. Sometimes it is best to have all questions directed only to one person, to give others time to think about the answers.
12. Recess and caucus frequently.
It is remarkable what we humans see in hindsight. Giving yourself time to thinkchanges hindsight to foresight and it will make you a better negotiator.
13. Have a good dancer
14. Go to the toilet
15. Check list of verbal devices for gaining time
16. Arrange a code with your secretary so that s(he) can break into the conversation an “urgent request for you to go.
* “Sorry the chairman has just walked into the office, I’ll get back you”
* I’ll call you back in a few minutes
* This is an interesting point and I must give it some quiet thought.
* Catch your breath and start coughing and gasp out that you need the get a drink of water and will come straight back
Forbearance: When both parties want to reach a win/win solution, they give time to each other to think. This strategy is called forbearance