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  1. In our fast paced society, waiting has become a lost art. Our society underestimates the benefits of waiting or developing self-regulation and self-control. We live in a time of instant messaging and instant response, this sets up an expectation for immediate gratification. This learned behavior makes it difficult for parents to teach children to develop self-regulation and impulse control. The developmental benefits and skills learned through self-regulation set a child up for a lifetime of success. The facilitator identified practical strategies a parent or caregiver can use to support the development of self-regulation skills. Abstract Objectives The facilitator engaged in a thorough review of literature that focused on self-regulation and impulse control. In addition, the facilitator completed doctorate course work in this area. The combination of these two activities helped shape the video presentation. Materials and Methods Results This video is intended to be watched by the parents and caregivers of infants and toddlers, so they can reflect upon how they helping their child to develop self-regulation skills. Raising the awareness in this area could play an important role in the future of our society. Barratt, E.S. (1994). Impulsiveness and Aggression. In Monahan, J. and H. J. Steadman (Eds.), Violence and Mental Disorder: Developments in Risk Assessment (pp. 61-79). University of Chicago Press, Chicago, IL. Brazleton, B., & Sparrow, J. (2006). Touchpoints birth to 3 - your child's emotional and behavioral development. (2nd ed). Cambridge, Mass: Da Capo Press. Chan, R. (2008). What is executive function? Manuscript submitted for publication, Department of Psychiatry, The University of Hong Kong, Beijing, China. Retrieved from http://www.psychiatry.hku.hk/rck_chan.html Chapman, G. (1995). The five love languages: How to express heartfelt commitment to your mate. (6th ed.). Chicago: Northfield Publishing. Covey, S. (1989). The 7 habits of highly effective people. (1st ed.). New York, NY: Simon & Schuster. Duckworth, A., Tsukayama, E., & Kirby, T. (2013). Is it really self-control? Examining the predictive power of the delay of gratification task. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, doi: 10.1177/0146167213482589. Epub 2013 Apr 12. Erikson, E. (1980). Identity and the relief cycle (Vol. 1). WW Norton & Company; London, England. Kidd, C. (2012). rational snacking: Young children's decision-making on the marshmallow task is moderated by beliefs about environmental reliability . Cognition, Retrieved from http://www.bcs.rochester.edu/people/ckidd/papers/KiddPalmeriAslin2012_Cognit ion. pdf Kohn, A. (2008). Why self-discipline is overrated. Phi Delta Kappan, Retrieved from http://www.alfiekohn.org/teaching/selfdiscipline.htm (Kohn, 2008) Lavoie, R. (2007). The motivation breakthrough: 6 secrets to turning on the tuned-out child. New York, NY: Touchstone. Retrieved from http://www.ricklavoie.com/gateindex.html Levine, M. (2003). The myth of laziness. New York: Simon and Schuster Publishing. Maslow, A. H. (1970). Religions, values, and peak experiences. New York: Penguin. (Original work published 1964) McLeod, S. A. (2007). Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs - Simply Psychology. Retrieved from http://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html Perry, B. (2002). Childhood experiences and the expression of genetic potential: What childhood neglect tells us about nature and nurture. Retrieved from http://www.childtrauma.org/images/stories/Articles/mindbrain.pdf Perry, B. (2004) Maltreated Children: Experience, Brain Development, and the next Generation. New York: W.W. Norton. Piaget, J. (1983). Piaget's theory. In P. Mussen (ed). Handbook of Child Psychology. 4th edition. Vol. 1. New York: Wiley. Ryan, R., & Deci, E. (2000). Intrinsic and extrinsic motivation - classic definition and new direction. (University of Rochester) Retrieved from http://www.selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2000_RyanDeci_IntExtDefs.pdf Scholl, R. (2002). Sources of motivation. Retrieved from http://www.uri.edu/research/lrc/scholl/webnotes/Motivation_Sources.htm Schore, A. (2001). The effects of early relational trauma on right brain development, affect regulation, and mental health. Infant medical health Journal, 22(1 - 2), 201-269. doi: DOI: 10.1002/1097-0355(200101/04)22:1<201:AID IMHJ8>3.0.CO;2 Sears, W., & Sears, M. (1994). The birth book - everything you need to now about having a safe and satisfying birth. Boston, Mass: Little Brown and Company Somerville, J. Gotlib, J. Ayduk H, Franklin T. Askren, K. Shoda, Y. (2011). Behavioral and neural correlates of delay of gratification 40 years later. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 108(36), 14998-15003. Spraragen, S. (2005). Human factors everywhere- an observation about instant gratification. Ergonomics in Design: The Quarterly of Human Factors Applications , 13(132), doi: 10.1177/106480460501300112 Szalavitz, M. (2011, 09 06). The secret of control - the marshmallow test 40 years later. Time.com, Retrieved from http://healthland.time.com/2011/09/06/the-secrets-of-self-control-themarshmallow- test-40-years-later/ Vansteenkiste, M., Simons, J., Lens, W., Soenens, B., Matos, L. (2005). Examining the motivational impact of intrinsic versus extrinsic goal framing and autonomy-supportive versus internally controlling communication style on early adolescents' academic achievement. Child Development, 2, 483-501. Watts, R. H., Jr., Cashwell, C. S., & Schweiger, W. K. (2004). Fostering intrinsic motivation in children: A humanistic counseling process. Journal of Humanistic Counseling, Education and Development, 43, 16-24. Made available courtesy of The American Counseling Association: Retrieved from http://www.counseling.org This objective of this video is to help people working with children from zero to three learn more about the importance of the development of self-regulation skills. The facilitator examined the important aspects of self-regulation and delayed gratification. The information obtained was integrated into a video presentation dealing with the “how, what, when , where and why” of self-regulation. It is hope that caregivers watching this video will gain positive strategies that can be used on a daily basis to help children learn to: teach children through play become aware of temperaments delay gratification set limits share and take turns Santa Barbara City College Judy Osterhage Self-Regulation – Is it Really That Important to Wait? Contact Conclusions Through the process of creating this video, the facilitator identified the paramount importance of self-regulation skills. Developing self-regulation skills can predict school success, social success, less anger, less tantrums, and less engagement in risky behavior. This video provides parents and caregivers with the tools to help their children learn to calm themselves, take turns, wait and develop self-control. An unexpected result of this research showed there is a downside to self-regulation if all influences are external. If self-regulation is based on manipulation or fear it could lead to a development of false self and create anxiety. Some specialists believe when self-regulation is heavily external it is from fear instead of internal control. Experts caution that too much obedience may stifle the spirit and the spontaneous nature of children. More research in this area is needed to clarify these concerns. Judy Osterhage: josterhage@cox.net References