1 / 25

Excerpts from

Excerpts from. University Counseling Center. COLLEGE!. Pride. Relief. Panic. Sadness. Awe. Excitement. Peace. Gratitude. Fear. The college years are a time for:. furthering healthy development --social, emotional, & professional development of the entire family exploring new roles

Download Presentation

Excerpts from

An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author. Content is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use only. Download presentation by click this link. While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server. During download, if you can't get a presentation, the file might be deleted by the publisher.

E N D

Presentation Transcript


  1. Excerpts from University Counseling Center

  2. COLLEGE! Pride Relief Panic Sadness Awe Excitement Peace Gratitude Fear

  3. The college years are a time for: • furthering healthy development--social, emotional, & professional development of the entire family • exploring new roles • enhancing self-confidence • learning additional coping skills • solidifying one’s identity and purpose • learning from successes & mistakes--within the security of our unconditional love and acceptance

  4. and, for some, the college years may also mean: • separation anxiety and depression • power struggles • visits home driven by guilt and obligation • family crises as distractions to development • solidification of unhealthy patterns • financial challenges • confusion about new roles

  5. What type of life do you want for your adult children?

  6. What “Letting Grow” looks like • We have a sense of personal security about the job we did as parents. • We act as role models/mentors of positive self-esteem, health, wellness, & maturity. • We demonstrate unconditional love for our children and ourselves. • We are honest about our own imperfections and open to lifelong learning and growth. • We allow our adult children to learn in the ways they learn best.

  7. Respect & Trust Encouragement Safe relationships Respect for boundaries & privacy Fun & play Appropriate affection Invitations (not mandates) to be involved in family activities ROLE MODELS: healthy choices & relationships self-respect and self-discipline coping skills personal accountability for mistakes healthy lifestyles healthy communication Parenting needs of adult children

  8. Support & Empowerment •  Empowerment: guide vs. taking action •  Time management •  Difference between high school/college • Money Management, Budgets, & Credit Cards

  9. When To Step In • repeated, tearful phone calls • significant, rapid change in weight • frequent illness or fatigue • marked changes in behavior or mood • social withdrawal or poor class attendance • compulsive behaviors • difficulty coping with a trauma or family crisis • prolonged, recurrent, or severe sadness or anxiety • threats of suicide or signs of substance abuse

  10. Who’re you gonna call? Life threatening emergencies: University Police (361) 825-4444 General concerns: Student Affairs Office (361) 825-2612 Concerns about emotional well-being, handling crisis, referrals, etc.: University Counseling Center (361) 825-2703 or Dr. Chenaux Ms. DeGaish Dr. Harper-Ray

  11. What if my adult child asks to quit school? • Suggest that she/he talk with an advisor, professor, or counselor. • Discuss the pros and cons. • Help her/him articulate options (vs lecturing or threatening). • Be empathic & listen.

  12. What if my adult child has special needs? • Suggest that she/he contact Services for Students with Disabilities Ms. Suzanne Grant at (361) 825-5816. • Encourage self-advocacy. • Suggest that she or he contact the University Counseling Center (361-825-2703), if needed.

  13. What about roommate problems? • Encourage open, respectful communication. • Encourage a talk with the resident advisor or apartment manager. • For serious problems, contact the Director of Housing (361) 825-2835, Dr. Amanda Chesser • Suggest they meet jointly w/a counselor.

  14. Avoiding the “empty nest” syndrome: Don’t take things personally. It’s your new beginning too! Keep busy. Keep in touch. Take care of yourself.

  15. Exercising Healthy Eating Talking to Yourself--positively Writing, Journaling Being Creative Cultivating Healthy Relationships Counseling Use of Healthy Relaxation Methods Practice Optimism Cultivating Humor & Play Reaching Out to Others--Besides our Children SELF-HELP STRATEGIES

  16. $$$ worries Physical health concerns Being “caught in the middle” Competing expectations Too little communication Too much information Deaths Overprotectiveness/ over-control or abandonment Parental divorce Untreated emotional health concerns Top 10Stressorsfrom home:

  17. Positive communication “I love you” Care packages including community updates A forgiven past Family stability Happy, healthy parents/role models Peacefulvisits home Relating adult-to-adult Ability to laugh and play together Modeling & encouraging help-seeking Top 10Success Enhancersfrom home:

  18. Letting Grow is a win-win situation for everyone!

  19. www.collegeparents.org • Advancing Personal Financial Knowledge • Combating Alcohol Abuse on Campushow to talk about binge drinking • Fighting Scholarship Scams • Making Spring Break Safer • Campus Fire Safety • Avoiding Financial Losses Newsletter: The College Parent Advisor 1-888-256-4627

  20. When in doubt aboutwho to call, call Student Affairs 361.825.2612 Dr. Eliot Chenaux Ms. Ann DeGaish

  21. For Further Reading Letting Go: A Parents' Guide to Understanding the College Years by Karen Levin Coburn Mothers and Daughters: Loving and Letting Go by Evelyn S. Bassoff

  22. Empty Nest… Full Heart: The Journey from Home to College by Andrea Van Steenhouse Becoming a Wise Parent for Your Grown Child: How to Give Love and Support Without Meddlingby Ph.D. Betty Frain &Eileen M. Clegg

  23. Give Them Wingsby Carol Kuykendall Grown-Up Children Who Won't Grow UpbyLarry V., Stockman &Cynthia S. Graves

  24. Don’t Tell Me What to Do, Just Send Money: The Essential Parenting Guide to the College Years (Johnson & Schelhas-Miller) http://www.powells.com/subsection/CareersCollegeAdmissionandSurvival.html

  25. University Counseling Center • For appointments, have the student: • Call (361) 825-2703 or • Stop by the Driftwood Building • For after hours emergencies (threat of danger to self or others): • Call University Police at 825.4444

More Related