Developing Leaders: Understanding Children Effectively

1. Developing Leaders IEmphasis: Get to know your child Monday, October 6, 6-9 p.m., Forest Hills Media Center

2. Contact Information: Jeff Thelen Address:Forest Hills Elementary School13708 Holly RdEden Prairie, MN 55346 Phone: 952-975-8683 E-mail: jthelen@edenpr.org Website: http://teachers.edenpr.org/~jthelen/

3. Organizational tip… • Notebook • Table of Contents: • Topic (on left) • Page (on right) • Leave a few pages blank for adding topics • Number remaining pages

4. Information Age: • We live in an information age…fads, advice, books, experts, travel, change, distance • Principle I follow: if the concept helps me in all of life, hold onto it…if it doesn’t, let it go. • People know a lot, but knowledge doesn’t always help what truly counts… • Biggest complaint of businesses to schools: “Smart kids don’t know how to work well with others.”

5. Myth of Environment • Explicit instruction: • Assume nothing; teach everything • Myth of Environment = teaching is an art form • "Teaching should not be an art; it is a practice. Suggesting it is an art allows teachers their 'own personal touch and creativity' which results in further inconsistencies for students.“ National Urban Alliance, July, 2008 • Medical field mostly aligns with this

6. The Five Love Languages Gary Chapman http://fivelovelanguages.com/

7. Words of Affirmation • reinforcing a difficult decision • calling attention to progress made on a current project • acknowledging a person’s unique perspective on an important topic

8. Quality Time • Involves sharing experiences, thoughts, feelings and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted context

9. Receiving Gifts • any visible sign of your love will leave them feeling happy and secure in your relationship

10. Acts of Service • It is important to do these acts of service out of love and not obligation

11. Physical Touch • They can be big acts, such as back massages • They can be little acts such as touches on the cheek or a hand on the shoulder

12. Making It Right

13. The Five Languages of Apology Gary Chapman http://fivelovelanguages.com/

14. Expressing Regret • I’m SO sorry.

15. Accept Responsibility • I was wrong.

16. Make Restitution • Do something nice… • Broke it? Fix it…

17. Genuinely Repent • I will change.

18. Request Forgiveness • Will you forgive me?

19. Personality Traits

20. Proverb: • Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is older he will not depart from it. • Train up a child in the way he should go… • Train up a child in the way he should go… • Focus on the natural bent(s)…honors uniqueness

21. 4 Personality Traits: • Lion • Otter • Golden Retriever • Beaver From The Treasure Tree (Tommy Nelson, Inc. 1992)

22. When balanced (strengths): Leader Good ideas Focused Determined Articulate When out of balance (weaknesses): Too demanding May forget the feelings of others Need to more softly communicate wants/needs (think of Drive-Thru) Can learn much from all others but especially golden retrievers Lion

23. When balanced (strengths): Energetic Fun to be around Life of the party Positive….”Anything’s possible!” Many friends Verbal When out of balance (weaknesses): Failure to see potential consequences of actions Prioritization Need to concisely communicate wants/needs (think of Drive-Thru) “Good is the enemy of the best” Shallow relationships Can learn much from all others but especially beavers. Otter

24. When balanced (strengths): Sensitive Caring Gets along with others When out of balance (weaknesses): Often a “doormat”…this may lead to outbursts of anger Remember 24-3-7 (Angeles Arrien) Need to become more assertive Need to more clearly communicate wants/needs (think of Drive-Thru) Can learn much from all others but especially lions Golden Retriever

25. When balanced (strengths): Does quality work Organized Efficient Pays attention to detail Pursues what’s best When out of balance (weaknesses): Critical of other people’s imperfections Majors on the minors Can learn much from all others but especially otters “If I had My Life To Live Over Again” Beaver

26. Bottom line: • We need each other • Do We Have As Much Sense As A Goose?

27. Multiple Intelligences and Learning Styles

28. Multiple Intelligences (Howard Gardner): • Linguistic: Gifted in the language areas of reading, writing, listening, speaking • Logical-mathematical: An unusual ability for problem solving and mathematical concepts • Spatial: An ability to see mental images or pictures • Bodily-Kinesthetic: A keen sense of body movement and activity • Musical: Gifted at processing rhythmically • Intrapersonal: An extraordinary sense of one's own affect • Interpersonal: An extraordinary sense of others' affects • Naturalist: A keen sense of the natural world of plants and animals

32. Multiple Intelligences: • Translation is the key to MI

33. Learning Styles: • Learning Styles: Auditory…learn through hearing Visual…learn through seeing Kinesthetic…learn through touch, movement, and/or doing

36. Developing Leaders IIEmphasis: Get to know how to motivate your child. Monday, November 3, 6-9 p.m., Forest Hills Media Center