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2-Cows…. and

2-Cows…. and. Capitalism. Traditional Capitalism. You have 2 Cows You sell one and buy a bull Your heard multiplies, & the economy grows You sell them and retire on the income. French Capitalism. You have 2-Cows You go on strike because you want 3 Cows.

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2-Cows…. and

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  1. 2-Cows….and Capitalism

  2. Traditional Capitalism • You have 2 Cows • You sell one and buy a bull • Your heard multiplies, & the economy grows • You sell them and retire on the income

  3. French Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You go on strike because you want 3 Cows

  4. British Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • Both are Mad!

  5. American Capitalism • You have 2-Cows. • You sell 3 of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your friend at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for 5-Cows. • The milk rights of the 6-Cows are transferred via an intermediary to a company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all 7-Cows back to your listed company. • The annual report says the company owns 8-Cows, with an option on 1 more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with 9-Cows. • No balance sheet available for release • The public buys your Bull.

  6. Japanese Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. • You then create clever cow cartoon images called CowkiMon and market them worldwide.

  7. Australian Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of 4-Cows • You are confused when the cow drops dead.

  8. German Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat only once a month, and milk themselves.

  9. Canadian Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • One speaks French, one speaks English. • One fights to create a new country, the other won't let it. • They both play ice hockey & life goes-on.

  10. Italian Capitalism • You have 2-Cows, but you don't know where they are. • You break for lunch.

  11. Swiss Capitalism • You have 5000-Cows, none of which belong to you. • You charge an outrageous fee to others for storing them.

  12. Chinese Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You have 300 people milking them • You claim full employment, high bovine productivity • You arrest & detain without trial the journalist who reported the number of cows.

  13. Russian Capitalism • You have 2-Cows • You count them & learn you have 5-Cows • You count them again and learn you have 42-Cows • You count them again and learn you have 12-Cows • You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

  14. Lebanese Capitalism • You have no cows • The Syrians have one cow • You convince them to sell the cow to the Kuwaitis with a 50% profit • The Syrians are satisfied with the 50% they made • The Kuwaitis are happy because you arranged a good deal for them • Your commission is worth TEN cows

  15. Saudi Capitalism • You buy 1000-Cows • There is no grass, just sand • You buy European grass for them • You hire one foreigner to milk them and 100 Saudis to watch him • The milk cost you 500% more • You call it "WATANI" and sell it in the local market

  16. Egyptian Capitalism • You have One-Cow • You keep telling people you have Ten

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