Interpersonal conflict management
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Interpersonal Conflict Management. Conflict Management Center Program on the Advancement of Research on Conflict and Collaboration (PARCC). Agenda. Introduction Conflict Exercise: Shuffle the Deck Definition of Conflict Conflict Escalation and De-Escalation Reflective Listening Exercises

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Interpersonal Conflict Management

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Interpersonal conflict management

Interpersonal Conflict Management

Conflict Management Center

Program on the Advancement of Research on Conflict and Collaboration (PARCC)


Agenda

Agenda

  • Introduction

  • Conflict Exercise: Shuffle the Deck

  • Definition of Conflict

  • Conflict Escalation and De-Escalation

  • Reflective Listening Exercises

  • Position vs. Interests

  • Wrap up


Ground rules

Ground Rules

  • Confidentiality

  • Suspend judgment

  • All responsible for learning

  • Real life issues

  • Safe to make mistakes

  • Cell phones silent


Shuffle the deck

Shuffle the Deck

  • Write a brief interpersonal conflict situation you are willing to share on an index card. Cards are then gathered, shuffled, and re-distributed within the group.

  • Make sure not to write your names on cards

  • Each person in the group introduces themselves then reads aloud from the card they is dealt and the group talk about the possible outcomes of the conflict.


Interpersonal conflict

Interpersonal Conflict...

  • … is an expressed struggle,

  • between two or more parties,

  • that are interdependent,

  • involving strong emotion,

  • and a perceived blockage to needs and/or values.

    (N. Katz)


Escalation role play

Escalation Role Play

  • Be a ‘fly on the wall’ for the conflict that’s about to be portrayed.

  • Take note of how the conflict escalates- both verbally and nonverbally- what happens?


Skills for de escalating conflict

Skills for De-escalating conflict

  • Reflective Listening*

    • Based on work of Carl Rogers (1951) and Thomas Gordon (1970) who coined term ‘active listening’

      *Source: Rautalinko and Lisper, 2005


Reflective listening

Reflective Listening:

  • A special type of listening that involves paying respectful attention to the content and feelings of another’s communication, hearing and understanding, and then letting the other know that he/she is being heard and understood

  • It is a process of “checking in” to ensure understanding

    Source: Neil Katz


De escalating role play

De-escalating role play

  • Let’s revisit our initial escalating conflict. . . what’s different this time?


Reflective listening requires two steps

Reflective Listening requires two steps:

1)Hear and understand what the other is saying through his/her words and body language.

2)Reflect (express) the thoughts and feelings heard through your own words, tone of voice, posture, and gestures so that the other knows that he/she is heard and understood.

Example: You’re feeling ________ about/when/because _______


Reflective listening exercises

Reflective Listening Exercises

  • Roommate problems

  • Pass the Pen


The challenge of identifying interests

The Challenge of Identifying Interests

Positions

“Why?”

Interests


Positions versus interests

Positions versus Interests

  • Position

    - What you decided you want in a particular situation

    - A specific solution

  • Interests (often rooted in human needs)

    - What caused you to decide

    - The specific needs in a situation which caused you to take a particular position or come to a particular position.


Interest inquiry

Interest Inquiry

  • to identify interests

    - What will having that (the position) do for you ?

    - How will things change if you get your position?

  • to brainstorm options

    - What are the possible options that will meet the interests?

  • to evaluate options

    - What is a good way of doing that?

    - Will that option identify all of the needs/interests?


Thank you for your participation and attention

Thank you for your participation and attention!


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