Why can’t our employees write better?

1. Why can’t our employeeswrite better? Jack E. Appleman, CBC Oct. 19, 2004 www.sgwriting.com

2. About me… • 25-year communications pro • Written/supervised many types of writing • Writing workshops to different audiences • One-on-one writing coach • Professor of bus. writing/ communications: FDU & College of Mount St. Vincent

3. Today’s discussion... • Why employees can’t write/how it hurts • Planning a writing training • Conducting a training—with you • Determining ROI

4. Johnny & Judy employee fall short… Associated Press, 9/19/04 Employers say workers need help “A majority of U.S. employers say about one third of workers do not meet the writing requirements of their position.”

5. Johnny & Judy fall short… …lack of training …wrong approach to writing

6. Little training/wrong approach • How many years since prior instruction? • High school/college English syndrome—1,000 words or bust! • Fear of being graded! • Viewed as a chore

7. Johnny & Judy’s biggest mistakes… • Don’t take “simple” approach • Don’t get to the point fast enough!

8. World with too much info… …and growing impatience!

9. Information overload • 4,000 ad messages a day • 100 e-mails a day • Constant interruptions Document better be compelling!

10. Bad writing hurts…. • Boss/client misses key points • Boss/client gets offended • Boss/client doesn’t read it • Inefficiencies galore—wasted time/money! • Writer loses chance to show leadership qualities

11. Bad writing clouds the company’s flow of information

12. Planning a writing training: identify who needs help • You may already know some • Survey employees—including managers/supervisors • Don’t forget executives

13. Planning a writing training: management buy-in • Report on level of interest • Explain scope of problem—globally & at your firm • Identify writing problems with decision-maker • Explain that program will be customized • Explain follow-up ROI analysis After buy-in: promote through newsletters, Intranet, emails, word of mouth, etc.

14. Planning the training • Review list of registrants • Determine number of workshops—max 20 people • Group by level/department if possible

15. Tailoring training to employees’ needs Choose instructor—involve in process • Review sample documents • Identify trouble spots/patterns • Speak to managers to uncover writing problems

16. Developing training content • Core writing skills • Registrants’ deficiencies • Commonly-written documents • New template—e.g. client letters or performance reviews

17. Developing training format Two phases • Three- to five-hour group workshop • One-on-one meetings

18. Sample training: explain objectives • Learn key techniques of business writing. • Learn how to apply these techniques to commonly written documents. • Identify personal areas of your writing that need to be improved and begin honing skills in these areas.

19. Sample training: explain format • Group workshop • In-class writing exercises • Totally interactive • One-on-one consultation

20. Sample training: explain content Core skills • Be clear • Be concise • Use proper grammar • Be compelling Participants’ specific needs • Use the right tone • Use email properly

21. Be clear Unclear Attorney Sue Jones has been heavily involved with many of the top real estate developers in Morris County. Clear Attorney Sue Jones has represented many of the top real estate developers in Morris County.

22. Be clear Unclear The deadline for getting your mailing out at a lower rate is nearing, toward the end of November, so it would be appreciated if you could provide me with the necessary data well in advance, at least two weeks or so before. e1

23. Be clear Clear To qualify for the lower mailing rates, you need to provide me with the data by Nov. 15, two weeks before the Nov. 30 deadline.

24. Be clear Unclear The claims manager told the vendor last week the terms were changed. Did the claims manager talk to the vendor last week? Or, were the terms changed last week?

25. Be clear Clear: 2 options Last week, the claims manager told the vendor that the terms were changed. The claims manager told the vendor that last week the terms were changed.

26. Be clear: group items consistently Inconsistent grouping I suggest the following: • Scheduling a meeting once a week • Conference calls every month • We need to write reports that provide the status of claims each quarter e2

27. Be clear: group items consistently Consistent I suggest the following: • Weekly meetings • Monthly conference calls • Quarterly claims reports

28. Be concise: replace phrases with one word in the event that prior to the start of at this point in time due to the fact that in view of the fact that have the capability of

29. Be concise Wordy The account manager’s report was carefully illustrated. The document was five pages long. Concise The account manager’s five-page report was carefully illustrated.

30. Be concise Wordy You will be advised of our determination of the claim payment as soon as we receive the report on the claimant’s medical condition. Concise After we receive the claimant’s medical report, we’ll let you know if the claim will be paid.

31. Be concise Wordy Following my review of the Web marketing contract, it is not one that I can approve of at this time, since the terms are not satisfactory. Specifically, we need to ensure that the email database is part of the contract, after which I’ll gladly give my approval to it. e3

32. Be concise Concise I’ll approve the Web marketing contract once the e-mail database is incorporated.

33. Use proper grammar • it’s vs. its • principal vs. principle The principal/principle reason I’m here is to help improve your writing.

34. Use proper grammar • complement vs. compliment • i.e. vs. e.g. The region manager has several responsibilities (i.e./e.g. management, customer service and liaison with the sales force).

35. Use proper grammar effect vs. affect Bad weather affects/effects his mood. Bad weather has a negative affect/effect on his mood.

36. Use proper grammar INCORRECT As a huge baseball fan, it was easy for Ron to memorize the players’ batting averages. CORRECT As a huge baseball fan, Ron could easily memorize the players’ batting averages.

37. Find thegrammar/usage errors • ABC Company has expanded its line of products, which now include three grades of ink. • Everyone on your team needs to understand XYZ Company and their mission. • She received less votes than her opponent. • Due to the heavy snow, the meeting scheduled for December 6 was canceled and rescheduled for December 13.

38. Be compelling: active verbs Passive It is our recommendation that John Smith, the account manager, be promoted. Active We recommend that John Smith, the account manager, be promoted.

39. Be compelling: replace with active verbs I need to make a proposal for changes. All Board members were in agreement.

40. Be compelling: active verbs Passive A decision was reached by the supervisor to deny the claim. Active The supervisor decided to deny the claim.

41. Be compelling:replace with active verbs • We will perform an analysis of workers’ compensation claims. • I need to call your attention to the fact that the report is due Oct. 27. • We are of the opinion that the Internet will reduce costs. • Last year’s results should be taken into consideration.

42. Are we in agreement that you need to have an understanding of what it takes to write clear and concise copy?

43. Be compelling: dynamic words Okay The latest innovations will help our company achieve a new level of excellence. Compelling The latest innovations will propel our company to new heights.

44. Be compelling Dull We’re meeting on Nov. 1 to discuss the positive results from the third quarter, including record-high revenues, and to recognize those who contributed. We’ll see how we could improve on these results for next year. e4

45. Be compelling If it’s good news, convey excitement! Exciting/compelling Great news! Thanks to your hard work, we earned record-high revenues in the third quarter. We’re meeting on Nov. 1 to acknowledge everyone who made this happen, and see how we can do even better next year!

46. Be compelling: write like a journalist Given the recent decline in revenues, I suggest e-mailing $20 coupons to all stores—a move that could boost sales by 10% in the third quarter.

47. “Catching plane in 1 minute,tell me plan in a nutshell”

48. It’s what’s upfront that counts!

49. Use the right tone Negative tone I can’t believe the number of screw-ups you’ve all had on the ABC account! This account is critical to us, and we will not tolerate your cavalier attitude. Each of you MUST attend a meeting this Thursday, Oct. 21 at 9 a.m. to review procedures! No exceptions! e5

50. Use the right tone Productive tone Several serious errors have been made on the ABC account. We must do a better job servicing this client. Let’s meet this Thursday, Oct. 21 at 9 a.m. to review procedures.