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Gender Identity and Roles. Sex chromosomes—XX, XY Y is smaller—carries less information Occasionally some other combination occurs XXY—Klinefelter’s—a male will have an extra female chromosome Abnormal testes, no sperm, low testosterone, breast enlargement, mild retardation 1/500 males

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gender identity and roles
Gender Identity and Roles
  • Sex chromosomes—XX, XY
  • Y is smaller—carries less information
  • Occasionally some other combination occurs
    • XXY—Klinefelter’s—a male will have an extra female chromosome
      • Abnormal testes, no sperm, low testosterone, breast enlargement, mild retardation
      • 1/500 males
    • XYY—Supermale—tall, large ears, lower IQ
      • Originally thought to be more violent due to testosterone
      • Actually just more likely to get caught
    • XO—Turner Syndrome—1/2000 to 1/5000 girls
      • Short in stature
      • Infertile due to ovaries not developing correctly
prenatal sexual differentiation
Prenatal sexual differentiation
  • Single cell divides and divides and divides
    • By 28 days after conception, embryo is 1 cm long
    • But male/female identical except for chromosome
    • By 7th week, begin to see structures that will someday be male or female
      • Embryo has gonads, two sets of ducts (Mullerian and Wolffian) and external genitals (genital tubercle, folds, swelling)
    • Gonads—in 7th week after conception, begin differentiating
      • Male 1st, female somewhat later with ovaries at 10 or 11 weeks
      • On Y chromosome, find testis determining factor (TDF)
      • Wolffian ducts—in men, TDF encodes anti-Mullerian hormone
        • Woffian ducts turn into epididymus, vas deferens, and ejaculatory duct
        • Tubercle—glans penis
        • Folds—shaft of penis
        • Swelling—scrotum
      • Mullerian ducts—in males degenerate
        • In women, turn into fallopian tubes, uterus, upper part of vagina
        • Tubercle—clitoris
        • Folds—inner lips
        • Swelling—outer lips
      • By 4 mos, gender of child is apparent by appearance of genitals
errors in prenatal gender differentiation
Errors in prenatal gender differentiation
  • Money (1987) noted 8 variables of gender
    • Chromosomal
    • Gonadal (testes vs. ovaries)
    • Prenatal hormonal gender
    • Prenatal and neonatal brain hormonalization
    • Internal accessory organs
    • External genital appearance
    • Pubertal hormonal gender
    • Assigned gender/gender identity
  • In most cases, all 8 agree. However, any one of many accidents can cause this to go astray
  • An individual who has a mix of male and female reproductive structures so that gender at birth isn’t clear
    • Androgenital syndrome—internal sexual structures, but masculinized external genitals—clitoris resembles a small penis
      • Almost always have a female gender role
    • Androgen-insensitivity syndrome—XY males with less than normal prenatal sensitivity to androgens.
      • Feminized external genitals but no uterus or fallopian tubes
      • Also no male duct system—epididymus, vas, seminal vesicles, ejaculatory duct, etc
    • Dominican Republic Syndrome—genetic endocrine problem.
      • Dihydrotestosterone deficiency
      • Appear at birth to be females—have vaginal pouch and clitoris-sized penis
        • <.9 cm clitoris, >2.5 cm penis
      • At puberty, penis develops and psychological orientation changes. Most are heterosexual males
  • Gender role?
      • More recent research suggests that gender-reassigned kids (re-assigned before 18 months) aren’t happy about it
      • Reiner (2000)—brain has already by masculinized (Legato, 2000)
  • Gender identity disorder—person is distressed with gender and believes he or she is trapped in the body of the wrong gender
  • Gender dysphoria
  • Male to female—3x as common as female to male.
  • Don’t consider selves to be homosexual
  • Found throughout history
  • Typically show cross-gender preferences in play and dress early in childhood
  • There is no clear causes or understanding of this disorder
    • Psychotherapy typically fails
    • May be influenced by prenatal hormonal imbalances
    • Also possible that some are treated inappropriately or ambiguously by parents
sex reassignment surgery
Sex reassignment surgery
  • Counseling to assure adjustment (not someone who is lonely or schizophrenic)
  • Hormone tx—estrogen or androgen
  • Real life test—live 1-2 years as new gender
  • Surgery
      • Male—remove genitalia without severing nerves, then artificial vagina is created with skin of penis. Use device to dilate it for next 6 mos so it doesn’t close
      • Female—penis and scrotum constructed from tissues in genital area. Need implants to stiffen penis
  • Hormones for life
  • Outcome—Lundstrom et al (1984) international literature—90% happy with surgery, + results
    • Better looking resultsmore + outcome
gender roles and stereotypes
Gender roles and stereotypes
  • Gender roles: set of norms or culturally defined expectations that define how people of one gender ought to behave
  • Stereotypes: A fixed, oversimplified, conventional idea about a group of people
  • Generally, people believe that men and women differ psychologically.
  • 1993 Gallup poll—56 % men, 73% women believe that men and women are basically different.
  • Stereotypes haven’t changed much over last 25 years
  • Fairly constant across cultures
    • Williams and Best (1994)—survey of 30 countries. Same adjectives kept coming up to describe men and women
cognitive abilities
Cognitive abilities
  • Verbal
    • Girls are superior, even in infancy
    • But difference is small—1% due to gender
  • Visuo-spatial
    • Boys superior after age 10
    • Consistent differences found only for ability to mentally rotate objects
    • Perhaps women are people-oriented and men are object-oriented
  • Math
    • After age 12, boys excel, but evidence isn’t very consistent
    • Women do better in math class and some standardized tests
    • Among the gifted, men outperform women by a lot
    • Computational vs. abstract skills
  • Keys
    • Differences are small—1% due to gender
    • Educational factors are much stronger
    • Role of cultural expectations
    • Boys are more likely to have school problems, reading disabilities, speech delays
  • Showed people a video of a baby. ½ told it was a girl. ½ told a boy.
  • Similar study with toddlers showed similar effects.
  • Empathy
    • Women self-report more empathy and are described by others that way
    • Men- more likely to help in masculine appropriate situations
    • Women in more feminine appropriate situations.
    • Women are better at reading emotions—may account for differences in empathy
    • When observing others, no physio differences in response to emotions
  • Fear
    • In young kids, no observable differences
    • In older kids, girls report more fears
  • Aggression
    • Males in all cultures are more physically aggressive
    • Slight difference in verbal aggression
    • No difference in covert aggression
  • Communication
    • Women are more self-disclosing
    • Men talk more and interrupt more
    • Women are better at identifying non-verbals
  • Seeking health care
    • Men are less likely to seek routine and non-routine care
preferences for men and women
Preferences for men and women
  • Women are nearly 5x more likely to show an automatic preference for their own gender than men are to show favoritism for their own gender (Rudman& Goodwin, 2004)
  • Both males and females assoc positive words with women more than men
  • Men and women both prefer their mothers over fathers
gender differences in sexuality
Gender differences in sexuality
  • Largest difference in sexuality—masturbation
  • Attitudes about casual sex
    • Men more approving, women disapproving
    • “For you, is an emotional involvement a prerequisite for sex?”
      • Always—45 % women, 8 % men
  • Arousal to erotica
    • Little differences between genders
    • Julie Heiman—presented students with one of 4 tapes: erotic, romantic (no sex), erotic/romantic, and control
      • Explicit hetero sex most arousing for men and women
      • Both males and females found female-initiated, female-centered to be most arousing
      • Women were sometimes not aware of physio arousal, accuracy increased when instructed to focus on own bodies
  • Men more consistently have orgasms, during intercourse and masturbation
  • Male gender role more likely to have risky sex
  • Number of sexual partners
why are these differences here
Why are these differences here?
  • Bio factors
    • Anatomy—women’s genitals are not in plain view
    • Hormones—testosterone plays a big role in sexual beh and women have less
  • Cultural factors
  • Cognition—fear of pregnancy
  • Erotic dependency—women rely on men to learn about sex
  • Social desirability
    • Alexander & Fisher (2003)—bogus pipeline
      • Differences smaller in anonymous and even smaller in bogus pipeline
      • Women’s reports varied more than men’s as a result of testing condition
from where does gender typing come
From where does gender typing come?
  • Biological perspective
    • Evolution
    • Prenatal brain organization/hormone exposure
  • Socialization
    • The ways in which society conveys to the individual its norms or expectations for behavior
    • Parents
    • Schools
      • Less sexist than you might think, but some beh persists
      • Early years, spend more time on things girls are already good at
    • Media
      • Back in 1971, 89% of commercials were narrated by men. This has not appreciably changed.
    • Peers
cognitive developmental theory
Cognitive-developmental theory
  • Kohlberg—children are active participants
    • Form schemas about gender
    • To be gender-typed, kids need to learn 3 things
      • Gender identity—usually acquired by age 3
      • Gender stability—that people stay one gender for a lifetime—dev by age 4 or 5
      • Gender constancy—age 7 or 8—recognition that gender doesn’t change even if people change clothes or behavior
    • Once kids learn these things, they are motivated to learn and behave in gender appropriate ways
  • Gender Schema Theory
    • Goes one step further to address why gender is important
    • Dev by Sandra Bem
    • Gender schema—a way to organize perceptions of the world
    • Gender gains prominence as an organizer for kids because of society’s emphasis on it
    • Research supports that kids process this way
      • Boys and girls make errors in remembering gender-inconsistent beh
  • Masculinity and femininity as independent constructs
  • Can possess high amounts of each and use traits of each as necessary
  • 1/3 of college students are androgynous
  • Feminine women—take a back seat in groups, laugh in conforming way
  • Masculine and androgynous—better mental well being, adolescents--more popular and higher self-esteem
  • Androgynous—more comfortable with sexuality
gender cross culturally
Gender cross-culturally
  • Masculine
    • Japan
    • Austria
    • Venezuela
    • Italy
    • Switzerland
    • Mexico
  • Feminine
    • Sweden
    • Norway
    • Netherlands
    • Denmark
    • Costa Rica
  • US #15 masculine
key differences
Key differences
  • Masculine
    • Big and fast—beautiful
    • Economic growth
    • Women’s lib—women move to be like men
    • Dominant values—success, progress
    • Boys and girls study different subjects
    • Equity
  • Femininity
    • Slow and small-beautiful
    • Environment
    • Women and men become like each other
    • Dominant values—caring for others, perseverance
    • Study same subjects
    • Equality
  • Chemical substances secreted externally that convey information/cause responses in other members of the same species
  • Detected by vomeronasal organ in nonhuman mammals and in humans
    • Specialized olfactory structure
    • Currently no studies specifically linking VNO activity and changes in beh in humans
  • What we do know
    • A woman’s sexual exposure to a man at least once a week is assoc with increased freq of regular menstrual cycles; increase of fertile-type basal temp and double the estrogen level in the luteal phase (Cutler et al, 1998)
    • Cutler, Friedman, & McCoy (1998) exposed men to male pheromones in double-blind study. Pheromone users increase in
      • Sexual intercourse
      • Petting/kissing
      • Informal dates
    • Women with pheromones also increase sexual behavior
  • Women who live together menstrual synchrony
  • Spanish Fly—extracted from a Spanish beetle—now nearly extinct
    • Now synthesized as a wart remover
    • No aphrodisiac properties
    • Can damage the urinary tract and cause severe tissue damage
  • Placebo effect
    • Foods thought to have aphrodisiac properties
      • Oysters, clams, bulls’ testicles, celery stalks, ground up reindeer antlers and rhino horns, potatoes
      • None have any effect
  • Yohimbine
    • From African yohimbe tree
    • Stimulates blood flow to genitals
    • Used before Viagra
    • Toxic
  • Viagra—causes body to react, but still need sexual arousal
  • Exercise—increases sexual drive in both genders
  • Tranquilizers, barbiturates—Decrease sexual desire and impair sexual functioning, but can increase sexual arousal by lowering inhibition
  • SSRIs—decrease sexual desire
  • Nicotine—constriction of blood vessels, decreases testosterone
  • Alcohol—expectancy effects, but is a depressant
    • At low levels, people behave as they think they should—lower inhibitions, increased risky behavior
masters and johnson
Masters and Johnson
  • 1966 Human Sexual Response
  • 382 women, 312 men
  • 10,000 cycles of arousal
  • 4 stages
  • Basic physio processes
    • Vasocongestion—large amt of blood flows into a region as a result of the dilation of blood vessels, particularly in the genitals, swelling or erection results
    • Myotonia—muscle contraction
  • Beginning of erotic arousal
  • Males—scrotum thickens, pulled closer to body, spermatic cords shorten
    • Erection occurs very rapidly (corpora cavernosa and corpus spongiosum fill with blood)
    • Age, alcohol, fatigue make it occur more slowly
  • Females-lubrication of the vagina (fluids seep through semi-permeable vaginal membrane)
    • Begins 10-30 sec after onset of arousing stimuli
    • Tip of clitoris swells
    • Nipples become erect due to contractions of surrounding muscles
    • Breasts may swell
    • Labia minora swell and open up
    • Vagina expands, cervix and uterus pull up to make a larger cervical opening
  • Both men and women—may have sex flush—looks like measles on upper abdomen and chest, increase in bp and pulse
  • Vasocongestion at peak
  • Males
      • Penis completely erect, may fluctuate some
      • Glans swells
      • Testes may be 50% larger than unaroused
      • Preejaculate—few drops from Cowper’s gland
  • Women
      • Orgasmic platform—swelling or thickening of tissues surrounding outer 1/3 of vagina so that vaginal entrance is actually smaller—increases gripping
      • Clitoris retracts into body
  • Men and women—further increase in breathing, bp and pulse
  • Male
    • Rhythmic contractions at .8 sec intervals
    • 2 stages
        • Vas, seminal vesicles and prostate contract to force ejaculate into a bulb at the base of urethra
        • Ejaculatory inevitability—ejaculation can’t be stopped
        • Urethral bulb and penis contract rhythmically forcing semen through urethra and out the opening
  • Female
    • Basically similar—series of rhythmic contractions of the orgasmic platform
        • About .8 sec interval
        • 3-4 in mild orgasm, 12 in intense
        • Uterus contracts top down in waves
    • Male and female—sharp increase in pulse, bp, breathing, muscles contract throughout body—in face, arms, legs, hands
  • Sensation is similar for males and females as judged by written responses
  • Body returns to unaroused state
  • Female
    • First—reduction in swelling of breasts, makes nipples seem more erect as they are now standing out more
    • Sex flush goes away
    • 5-10 sec post orgasm, clitoris goes back to normal position. Takes longer to go back to normal size
    • Orgasmic platform relaxes, shrinks, ballooning of vagina diminishes, uterus shrinks
  • Males
    • Detumescence—loss of erection—2 stages
    • 1st—rapid—penis still enlarged following emptying of corpora cavernosa
    • 2nd—glans and corpus spongiosum empty more slowly
    • Refractory period
      • Incapable of having an erection—length varies, longer with age
      • No such period in womenpossibility of multiple orgasms—some men also have this possibility. In some it is learned, others innate
criticisms of masters and johnson
Criticisms of Masters and Johnson
  • Ignores cognitive and subjective aspects
    • Doesn’t explain how
        • Men can have erections without arousal
        • People have high desire but no erection or lubrication
  • Only studied highly sexual people—what about those with low desire?
kaplan s three stages of sexual response
Kaplan’s three stages of sexual response
  • Desire—psychological
  • Excitement—physiological, primarily vasocongestion
  • Orgasm—physiological, primarily muscle contractions
  • Makes it convenient to describe sexual dysfunctions
  • Three stages are relatively independent
love and attraction
Love and attraction
  • Physical attractiveness
  • Major determinant of interpersonal and sexual attraction (Hensley, 1992)
  • Hatfield and Sprecher (1986)—the key factor in considering partners for dates, sex, marriage
  • Women who are attractive get asked on more dates
  • What is attractive?
barbie norton et al 1996
Barbie (Norton et al, 1996)
  • Probability for body shape less than 1/100,000
  • Mattel has said that they visualize Barbie as an aspirational role model

Model Avg Barbie Anorexics

Bust 87.4 90.3 82.3 79.9

Waist 65.7 69.8 40.7 66.2

Hips 93.1 97.9 72.7 93.1

Ankle 21.7 22.0 15.6 20.0

  • About 1/50

Footballers Real People Ken

Chest 92.3 91.2 75.0

Waist 75.1 80.9 56.5

Hips 91.2 93.7 72.0

Thigh 54.4 53.0 41.3

  • Taller men are considered more attractive, but not taller women.
    • Relative height is also important
  • Slender ideal—stronger for whites
  • Women’s belief that men prefer large breasts is exaggerated.
    • Women stated ideal breast is larger than average.
    • Men preferred women with still larger breasts, but not as big as women believe they preferred.
    • Men also thought their peers would pick bustier women.
  • Men prefer women to be heavier than women think they would.
  • Women prefer men to be leaner than men think.
  • Men think their present shape is close to ideal.
    • Women see themselves as too heavy
attractiveness is affected by other things
Attractiveness is affected by other things
  • Both genders rate attractiveness higher when people are smiling
  • Gender role expectations
  • Names affect perceptions of physical appeal
  • Mere exposure affect
    • Tendency to like a person more if we have been exposed to him/her repeatedly.
    • >50% meet at school, work, church, party with friends
    • NHSLS---meet spouse through mutual friends (35 %), self-introduction (32 %)
  • Matching sounding names (Jones et al 2005)—
  • Selectively hard to get
  • Menpower, money—looks are less important
  • Good mood heightens attraction
long vs short term relationships
Long vs. short-term relationships
  • Want in a meaningful relationship

Women Men

Honesty 1 1

Fidelity 2 3

Personality 3 2

Warmth 4 5

Kindness 5 6

Tenderness 6 8

Sensitivity 7 4

Gentleness 8 10

Character 9 7

Patience 10 9

sexual relationship wish list
Sexual relationship wish list
  • Women
    • Attractiveness
    • Sexuality
    • Warmth
    • Personality
    • Tenderness
    • Gentleness
    • Sensitivity
    • Kindness
    • Build/figure
    • Character
  • Men
    • Build/figure
    • Sexuality
    • Attractiveness
    • Facial
    • Buttocks
    • Weight
    • Legs
    • Breath
    • Skin
    • Breasts
other studies of long term relationships
Other studies of long term relationships
  • Men—youth, physical attractiveness, cooking, frugality
  • Women—vocational status, earning potential, dependability, expressiveness, kindness, consideration, fondness for children
personal ad research wiederman
Personal Ad Research (Wiederman)
  • More men than women request attractive mate
  • More men than women request attractive body shape
  • More women than men request financial security
  • More women than men request earning capacity, education, IQ, ambition
  • Women were more likely than men to describe own physical attractiveness
  • Men were more likely than women to describe themselves as financially stable
  • Men were somewhat more likely to describe own earning potential
  • Men more likely to seek erotic relationships
  • Women generally sought someone their own age or older
  • Men generally sought someone their own age or younger
becker et al 2000
Becker et al (2000)
  • Replicated
    • Men more likely to seek physical attractiveness and attractive body shape and to offer status/financial resources and height and to request younger partners
    • Women were more likely than men to stipulate height, status/financial resources and employment.
  • Then looked at which ads were accessed to respond
    • Men seeking women--# of responses was related to whether advertisers offered height and weight, to advertisers’ ages and negatively assoc with whether advertisers stipulated attractive body shape
    • Women seeking men—number of accesses was related to whether advertisers offered attractive body shape and to whether advertisers stipulated attractive body shape and status/financial resources.
from where do our standards come
From where do our standards come?
  • Evolutionary forces
    • Youth and health more important for womenreproductive potential
    • Man’s reproductive value—financial/support/resources
  • But…
    • We marry/seek people similar to ourselves in attractiveness—not the most attractive person. Same with SES
    • Matching hypothesis
      • Similar in attractiveness, wealth, weight, attitudes, education, ethnicity (94% of white men are partnered with white women), religion, age (within 5 years)
      • We assume people we find attractive share similar attitudes
    • Reciprocity—we like people who like us
  • Janus survey: 96% of men, 98% of women say love is important.
  • Jankowiak and Fisher, 1992—HRAF study—147/166 cultures—romantic love was present. In the remaining cultures, probably absent due to study methods, according to the authors.
  • Are you in love?
greek heritage
Greek heritage
  • We use the same word to describe all types of love, but Greeks separated it out.
  • Storge—loving attachment or deep friendship or nonsexual affection (friends/parents)
  • Agape—selfless love—generosity and charity, epitomized by anonymous donations of money or giving
  • Philia—friendship love, liking and respect, not desire
  • Eros—closest to modern day passion
  • Majority believe romantic love is a prerequisite to marriage
    • Young people say it is the single most important reason
  • Who is more romantic?
    • Men
      • Fall in love earlier in a relationship
      • Cling longer to a dying affair
      • 3x as many men as women commit suicide after disastrous love affair
      • Among singles, 82 % of men and 77 % of women describe themselves as romantic
      • Among marrieds, 72 % of men, 79 % of women describe themselves as romantic
      • But---men are also more likely to feel lucid
        • That is, view relationship as playful enjoyment of a game
        • View sex as a pleasant pastime
what qualities do you want in a mate
What qualities do you want in a mate?
  • If someone had all of them, but you didn’t love them, would you marry anyway?
      • 1960s—70% women said yes, 40 % men
      • By mid-1980s, <20 % said yes
  • Both men and women value “dyadic attachment” which is essentially nest building or coupling—an emphasis on being together and sharing
  • Women value egalitarianism and autonomy in relationships more than men do
    • Speculation is that men assume they’ll have autonomy and women don’t
  • Women are more pragmatic about love
    • Have a shopping list of criteria
theories of love
Theories of love
  • Equity Theory—Hatfield
  • Two-component Theory of Love—Berscheid and Hatfield
    • Physiological arousal
    • Attribution
    • Bridge studies—more sexual imagery in questionnaires filled out by men on high bridge.
      • Also more likely to call with follow-up questions
styles of love hendrick and hendrick 1986
Styles of Love (Hendrick and Hendrick, 1986)
  • Questionnaire id’d 6 kinds of love among college students
  • Romantic love
  • Game-playing love
  • Friendship
  • Logical love
  • Possessive, excited love
  • Selfless love
  • Men—more likely to have romantic or game-playing love
  • Women—friendly, logical, or possessive styles
  • Couples with romantic and selfless styles—more likely to stay together
    • One study of 101 college student couples over 4 years (Sprecher et al)
      • 59 ended relationship by end of study
      • People did not end because of disappearance of love (still felt love for the other)
      • Rather, dissatisfaction or unhappiness that developed over time
      • For those who stayed together, commitment, love and satisfaction grew over time
sternberg s triangular theory of love
Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love
  • 3 fundamental components
  • Intimacy—emotional component—sense of sharing one’s self
  • Passion—motivational component—physical attraction and drive for sexual expression
  • Commitment—both short and long term
  • Represented in triangle
    • When all three are balance in importance—equilateral
    • Want your triangle to match your partner’s triangle
  • Types of love
    • Nonlove
    • Liking-i
    • Infatuation-p
    • Empty love-c
    • Romantic love-i and p
    • Companionate love-i and c
    • Fatuous love-p and c (foolish)
    • Consummate love—all 3
attachment theory of love
Attachment Theory of Love
  • Quality of early attachment affects how we will be able to form relationships in the future
  • Styles
    • Secure—53% of adults
    • Avoidant—26%
    • Anxious-ambivalent—20%
building relationships
Building relationships
  • Begin with surface contact—look for overlapping interests and attitudes
    • Small talk—helps us determine if relationship is worth pursuing
    • This is not insincere—tests ground
    • Opening lines—again—not insincere
    • Self-disclosure
      • Early disclosers are rated as less mature, less genuine than late disclosers
      • People are more likely to want to pursue future relationship with late disclosers
      • Gender differences in self-disclosure
social exchange theory
Social-Exchange Theory
  • Development of a relationship reflects the rewards and costs of maintaining the relationship vs. ending it
  • Communication problems—another common cause
  • Availability of alternatives also affects likelihood of continuing relationship
  • One of the most commonly mentioned reasons why relationships fail
  • Can lead to loss of feelings of affection, insecurity, anxiety, low self-esteem
  • Gender difference
    • Men—sexual infidelity
    • Women—emotional infidelity
relationship attitudes
Relationship attitudes
  • Mismatched couples on gender-role attitudes are less satisfied with relationship
    • More likely to break up
  • Among college students, men’s self-esteem—but not sat with relationship—is related to women’s sat with rel.
    • This is not true in reverse
  • Married men have greater life satisfaction than unmarried men
  • Men talk more than women—more often, longer, interrupt more, control topic more
    • Hold the floor if they don’t know what to say—um, ah
    • Men are more successful at interrupting women than other women
    • Women interrupt largely to express agreement—encourages men to talk more
  • Women’s speech is more tentative
    • More likely to use correct grammar and to articulate correctly
  • Men have 3 pitches to speech, women have 4
  • In relationships—women create intimacy through speech and self-disclosure
    • Men create intimacy through sex
  • Lonely people
    • Few social activities
    • Shallow relationships
    • Loneliness peaks in adolescence
    • Decreased marital satisfaction
    • More depression
    • Lower self-esteem
  • Causes
    • Lack of social skills
    • Lack of interest in other people
    • Lack of empathy
    • Fear of rejection
    • Failure to disclose personal info to potential friends
    • Cynicism about human nature
    • Demanding too much too soon
    • General pessimism
    • External LOC
  • Emotional closeness and connectedness that are marked by the sharing of inmost thoughts and feelings
  • People trust their partners when they make sincere investments in the relationship
  • Mutual cyclical growth
    • Feeling you need your partner and the relationship increases commitment to and dependence on the relationship
    • This causes pro-relationship acts
    • When the partner sees these acts, they increase trust
    • This increase in trust causes partner to feel they need you and the relationship and increases commitment to and dependence on relationship
keys to intimacy
Keys to intimacy
  • Honesty (but not too!)
  • Commitment
    • Resolve to continue relationship
    • Relationships do best when partners have similar level of commitment
  • Maintaining individuality
  • Communication
    • Potential problems
      • Misunderstanding words or phrases
      • Words don’t match nonverbal
      • Not able/willing to say what they truly feel
communication skills
Communication skills
  • Agree on the language to use
  • Be aware that there may be an irrational belief about the relationship
  • When getting started, talk about talking—request permission to talk
  • Listening skills
    • Active listening
    • Paraphrasing
    • Ask questions to clarify and draw other person out
    • Reinforce partner’s communication
    • Show that you value partner, even when you disagree
    • Use self-disclosure to learn about partner
  • Providing information
    • Accentuate the positive
    • Use verbal cues
    • Use non-verbals
    • Be specific in your requests
    • Use “I “
  • Delivering criticism
    • Evaluate your motives
    • Right time and place
    • Be specific
    • Avoid always and never
    • Use “I”
    • Stay in the present
    • Be constructive
    • Be positive
  • Receiving criticism
    • Clarify what you heard, what you want to know
    • Acknowledge criticism, even if you disagree
    • If you disagree, use “I” statements and be specific
    • Negotiate
interpersonal sexual behaviors
Interpersonal sexual behaviors
  • Erotophobia vs erotophilia
    • Negative vs positive views and emotional responses to sex
    • Related to difficulty talking about sex, less likely to acquire or use contraception
    • Men tend to be more erotophiliac
  • Virginity
    • Sprecher & Regan (1996)
      • Reasons given by undergrads
        • Relationship concerns (not in love or in relationship long enough)
        • Fear (STD or pregnancy)
        • Personal values/beliefs
        • Self-concept issues—feeling shy/undesirable
    • Thomsen & Chang (2000)
      • 292 undergrads
      • Most frequent comments about 1st intercourse
        • Wished they had waited longer
        • Wished they had been in a committed relationship
    • Involuntary abstinence
how many people are homosexual or bisexual
How many people are homosexual or bisexual
  • Kinsey continuum
    • Scale from 0 to 6 where 0 is exclusively hetero
  • Kinsey reported that 37 % had experienced male-male sex and 13% men, 7% women were predominantly homosexual
  • 10% is too high. How to define?
  • Self-identified—3% men, 2% women
  • Sexual behavior in past 5 years—5-11% of men, 2-4% of women
  • Sexually attracted, but no sexual interaction—8-9% men, 8-12% women
  • May be easier to look at who is exclusively heterosexual
    • 92% men, 95% women
  • Bisexual—1-4%, about 1% have bisexual identity
cross cultural perspective
Cross-cultural perspective
  • Ford and Beach (1951)—76 preliterate societies
    • Found homosexual behavior in all
    • Viewed as normal in 49
  • Never predominant
  • Never greater than 5%
  • Always more common in males
  • 52% say homosexuality should be legal, 51% say it is an acceptable lifestyle
  • Support for legal rights and non-discrimination is very high (85%), but support for homosexuality as lifestyle choice or sanctioned behavior is much lower overall
  • Age is a major differentiator—younger much more liberal
  • Republicans and conservatives are less accepting than Democrats and liberals
  • Majority are opposed to gay marriage, about half are opposed to civil unions
  • 4/10 think that homosexuals should not be allowed to work as clergy or elementary school teachers
  • 70% or so think that homosexuals should be allowed in the armed services
  • 46% support adoption rights, 44% do not
  • Those with strong gender role identity are more likely to be homophobic
  • Also…
    • Fundamentalist religion
    • Politically conservative
    • Men>women
  • Sources of homonegativity
    • Religion varies
    • Marital and procreative bias
    • Fear of HIV and AIDS
    • Rigid gender roles
    • Psychiatric labeling
  • Latent homosexual impulses—Adams et al 1996
      • Homophobic men, but not non-homophobic hetero men, were aroused by male-male videos. Denied feeling aroused
hate crimes and laws against homosexuals
Hate crimes and laws against homosexuals
  • As of October 2007, consensual sexual acts between adults of the same sex were punishable by death in seven countries:
    • Iran--Since 1979, executed more than 4,000 people
    • Mauritania
    • Nigeria
    • Saudi Arabia
    • Sudan
    • United Arab Emirates
    • Yemen
  • In 1999, the FBI reported that there were 1,317 incidents of violence based on sexual orientation. Of those, anti-male homosexuality violence characterized sixty-nine percent of the incidents (Federal Bureau of Investigation, 2000).
causes biological theory
Causes—Biological theory
  • MZ concordance for sexuality
    • 52% men
    • 48% women (Pillard)
    • 66 % (Whitam et al 1993)
  • DZ concordance
    • 22% men, 16% women
  • Adoptive
    • 11% men, 6 % women
  • Also, a chromosomal marker has been noted on the X chromosome
  • Prenatal hormonal influences
    • Women exposed to DES (estrogen)—more likely to be bi or lesbian
    • Stress on mothers during pregnancy increases likelihood of homosexuality
    • Theory—critical period during 2nd month and middle of 5th month
  • Brain
    • Simon LeVay (1991)—hypothalamic section of gay men were similar to women
      • Flaws—
      • Four attempts at replication—results remain unclear
psychoanalytic theory
Psychoanalytic theory
  • Freud
    • Infants are polymorphously perverse—that is, sexuality is indiscriminate and undifferentiated
    • As child grows, sexuality becomes directed at more appropriate objects (opposite gender), while same gender becomes repressed
    • Also comes from negative Oedipus complex—child loves parent of same gender and comes to identify with parent of opposite gender. Heterosexual kids repress this, but homosexual ones become fixated on it.
    • Latent homosexuality—repressed homosexual part of personality.
  • Irving Bieber—compared 100 homosexual and 100 heterosexuals
    • All in analysis
    • Found dominant mother and weak, passive father
      • Homoseductive mother—man fears heterosexuality because of possessive, jealous, overly intimate relationship with mother
      • Hated fathers, but wanted fatherly love
      • Research on this—Pillard et al
learning theories
Learning theories
  • Humans are born undifferentiated sexually and this becomes channeled (ie., punished heterosexuality (rape) or rewarded homosexuality
    • However—few rewards in our society for being homosexual
    • Children of gay parents are no more likely to be homosexual
two theories of adjustment
Two theories of adjustment
  • Sophie 1985/1986
  • First awareness that one is different
  • Test and exploration—often in teen years
  • Identity acceptance—typically early for boys
  • Identity integration—pride and commitment to orientation
  • Cass, 1979
  • Identity confusion
  • Identity comparison
  • Identity tolerance
  • Identity acceptance
  • Identity pride
  • Identity synthesis
coming out
Coming out
  • Deane, 2005
    • 86% of 800 teens had friend who was openly gay or lesbian
  • Flowers and Busten, 2001
    • Interviews with 21 gay menfeelings of being different, alienated, living a lie
  • Robinson, Walters, Skein, 1989
    • Telling parents
      • 402 parents of gay/lesbian
      • 26% suspected before they were told
  • Telling a spouse?
    • 20-40% of gay men are married
gender nonconformity
Gender nonconformity
  • On average, gay males are more feminine, lesbian women are more masculine
    • Homosexuals also tend to report more behavior like other gender in childhood
  • Daewood et al 2000
    • Males—homosexual as adults remembering being children
      • Report feeling different as kids, avoiding competitive sports, fearing physical injury, avoiding physical fights
  • Isay, 1990
    • Gay males report feeling more sensitivity during childhood and crying more easily
  • Bailey & Zucker, 1995
    • Lesbians are more likely to report being tomboys, rough and tumble games, no dresses
psychological adjustment
Psychological adjustment
  • Declassified as a psychological disorder in 1973
    • Other countries at a different pace (China in 2000, for example)
  • More likely to be depressed, anxious, commit suicide
  • More disturbed family relationships
  • Gay males—more likely to have eating disorders
  • Why?
    • Social oppression
      • See higher rates of problems following victimization
    • Lifestyle differences (gays in committed relationships are about as well adjusted as heterosexual married couples)
can therapy change sexual orientation
Can therapy change sexual orientation?
  • Few are interested in changing
  • Bell and Wienberg, 1978

White men AA me White women AA women

Magic pill at birth?28 23 16 11

Magic pill now? 14 13 5 6

  • Masters and Johnson
    • Failure rates of 20% for men, 23% for women
      • At 5 year follow up, 70% were still practicing heterosexual beh
      • Most were bisexual?
      • More than half were married
      • All were motivated to switch