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Private Victory. Before you’ll ever win in the public arenas of life, you must first win private battles within yourself. All change begins with you. Private victory helps you become independent. Public Victory.

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Private victory
Private Victory

  • Before you’ll ever win in the public arenas of life, you must first win private battles within yourself.

  • All change begins with you.

  • Private victory helps you become independent.

Public victory
Public Victory

  • Life’s most urgent question is:What are you doing for others? Martin Luther King Jr.

  • Public victory helps you become interdependent. It helps you learn to work cooperatively with others.

At the deathbed
At the deathbed

What do you wish you had spent more time doing?

  • In the office?

  • Making more money?

  • Or you want to spent more time with the people you love?

Rba similar to a bank account
RBA similar to a bank account

  • You can make deposits

  • You can take withdrawals

  • It can be a healthy account or an unhealthy account

Rba different from a bank account
RBA different from a bank account

  • You have opened an RBA with everyone you meet

  • Once you open an RBA with a person, you can never close it

  • The deposit of your RBA tends to evaporate


  • Share with your classmate (sitting next to you) the most powerful deposit someone has made into your RBA

Here are some examples
Here are some examples

  • When a friend, teacher, or loved one takes the time to say ‘You look nice’ or ‘Great job’.

  • My friends made me a banner on my birthday.

  • When I have made mistakes, they forgive, forget, and help and love.

Keeping promises
Keeping Promises

Dad, can I play computer game tonight? I have finished all my work.


Okay, I promise.


I have to complete the game!

Hint to you
Hint to you

If your RBA with your parents is low, try building it by keeping your commitments, because when your parents trust you, everything goes so much better.

Do small acts of kindness
Do Small Acts of Kindness

One kind word can warm three winter months! Japanese Saying

A hello, A kind note, A smile, A compliment, A hug – can make a big difference.

Do small acts of kindness1
Do Small Acts of Kindness

Don’t wait until people are dead to give them flowers!

Be loyal
Be Loyal

One of the biggest RBA deposits you can make is to be loyal to other people.

Loyal people keep secrets

Loyal people avoid gossip

Loyal people stand for relationship

Be loyal1
Be Loyal

People need to feel safe and secure in relationships


Listening to someone can be one of the simple but great deposits into another’s RBA; … because people don’t listen usually.

You have knowledge of this, dear brothers. But let every man be quick in hearing, slow in words, slow to get angry. James 1:19

Say you are sorry
Say You are Sorry

A yell, A bang to the door, Overreact, Make stupid mistake – will make a RBA overdrawn

But by saying ‘I was wrong’, ‘I apologize’, ‘I am sorry’ – can restore the overdrawn bank account

Why is it so difficult
Why is it so difficult?


A lack of courage

Defense mechanism

Over again
Over Again

I know that I have hurt youand wish I could take it back.I wish I could turn back the hoursand do it all over again.But we know that can’t happenthat it just isn’t possible.But I can say that I’m sorryand ask for your forgiveness.

Set clear expectations
Set Clear Expectations

To develop trust we need to avoid sending vague messages or implying something that is not true or not likely to happen


Think of a relationship that is damaged; propose the way to rebuild it.