Mentoring: the art of guidance and support. Dorthe Flauer, BA, Dip. SW, RSW Executive Director, SAFFRON: Strathcona Sexual Assault Centre Karen M. Nielsen, Ph.D, RSW (Clinical) Valerian Consulting Ann Marie Dewhurst, M.A., Reg. Psychologist (AB & NWT) Valerian Consulting
definition • a supporter • someone who believes in you, who roots for you, and who you can trust • an advisor, counselor, coach • someone who will give you advice and information when you ask for it • a sponsor • someone who will clear a path for you and actively make contacts or solve problems on your behalf • a role model • someone who shows what paths have already been forged and what can be achieved • a protector • someone who actively shields another from harm during a learning or growing process
Exercise 1 Identify a mentor in your life • Growing up • Parenting • Community • Professional • Academic • Other
How Mentoring Happens • Being mentored (direct or vicarious) • Finding yourself in the role • Setting out to find the role • Deliberately inviting the role Other experiences?....
Dual Relationships Dual relationship means having more than one role with another person. • Client to peer coordinator • Student to peer staff member Professional ethics and dual relationships. • Don’t have them? • Power analysis needed – e.g., small towns or communities
Power • Mutual v. hierarchical process • A two way street of learning • Happens for both mentee and mentor • What is learned is different for mentee and mentor • Role is not that of teacher • Enhancing Competence • Transferring skills from one environment to another • Growing knowledge (focus on mentee’s knowledge) • Shared analysis of process
Boundaries • Mutual respect • Explicit roles • Defined but flexible • Allows for change over time for both • Explicit limits • Deliberate problem solving • This is a real relationship
Mentoring • Is a deliberate practice. • Is mindful. Otherwise it is simply being a role model.
Good Question? How does mentoring as described here differ from the traditional roles of: • Parent-child • Siblings • Friendship • Employer-employee
Good Question? How do the following impact mentoring: • Age • Gender • Visible Minority • Culture/Ethnicity • Religion
Choice • Not everyone can mentor anyone. • There needs to be a shared vision of the world at some level. • Mentors and mentees may have different processes at different times.
Hope & Resiliency • A mentor is someone who has hope. • Hopeful people prefer happy outcomes but don’t need them in order to continue. • Both mentee and mentor need to have the ability to bounce back from adversity. • Life happens to both mentor and mentee.
Benefits • Enhances sense of self in both • Mentors relates to the student within and shares and gains confidence • Mentees find the teacher within and shares and gains confidence • Builds community • Building networks • Including other mentors or mentees in process
Problems • Being overly protective • Not allowing needed risks • Owning the mentee’s growth or failures • A wolf in sheep’s clothing • Pretending mutuality but believing in hierarchy • Potential for exploitation • Hidden agenda’s (preconceived or emerging) • Reproduction of “right” or narrow thinking. • Mentor’s view is only right view
Reflection • What have you taken from this discussion that is helpful to you in your role as: • A mentor • A mentee
References • Belenky, Mary Field, Blythe McVicker Clinchy, Nancy Rule Goldberger, & Jill Mattuck Tarule (1986). Women’s Ways of Knowing: The Development of Self Voice, and Mind. New York: Basic. • Emig, Janet (1983). Interview.. In Dixie Goswami and Maureen Butler (Eds). The Web of Meaning Upper Montclair, NJ: Boynton. • McDonald, Marci, (2003). The Mentor Gap. U.S. News & World Report, 135, (15)