spousal abuse n.
Download
Skip this Video
Loading SlideShow in 5 Seconds..
SPOUSAL ABUSE PowerPoint Presentation
Download Presentation
SPOUSAL ABUSE

Loading in 2 Seconds...

play fullscreen
1 / 152

SPOUSAL ABUSE - PowerPoint PPT Presentation


  • 112 Views
  • Uploaded on

SPOUSAL ABUSE. Goals of Lecture: Assessment & Treatment. Goals of the Class. THE STRUCTURE OF ASSESSMENT THERAPEUTIC ALLIANCE RISK ASSEMENT NEUROBIOLOGY OF VIOLENCE SYSTEMIC THEORY OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE & ATTACHMENT THEORY UNRESOLVED TRAUMA. GOALS OF ASSESSMENT PROCESS.

loader
I am the owner, or an agent authorized to act on behalf of the owner, of the copyrighted work described.
capcha
Download Presentation

PowerPoint Slideshow about 'SPOUSAL ABUSE' - kemal


An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation

Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author.While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server.


- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Presentation Transcript
spousal abuse

SPOUSAL ABUSE

Goals of Lecture:

Assessment & Treatment

goals of the class
Goals of the Class

THE STRUCTURE OF ASSESSMENT

  • THERAPEUTIC ALLIANCE
  • RISK ASSEMENT
  • NEUROBIOLOGY OF VIOLENCE
  • SYSTEMIC THEORY OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE & ATTACHMENT THEORY
  • UNRESOLVED TRAUMA
goals of assessment process
GOALS OF ASSESSMENT PROCESS
  • WORKING TO DEVELOP THE THERAPEUTIC RELATIONSHIP
  • ASSESS CLIENT’S SUITABILLITY FOR TREATMENT
  • CLINCICAL DIAGNOSIS
  • ASSESS VIOLENCE & SOCIAL HISTORY
  • ASSESS RISK FOR FURTHER VIOLENCE
  • PROVIDE INTERVENTION FOR VIOLENCE CONTROL
  • DEVELOP ASSESSMENT-BASED TREATMENT PLAN
therapeutic alliance
THERAPEUTIC ALLIANCE
  • THE CHALLENGE…
  • TO BUILD A Therapeutic Alliance WITHOUT COLLUDING WITH DANGEROUS ACTING OUT BEHAVIORS
  • Because so many perpetrators and victims have experienced abuse by authority figures, the process is difficult.
obstacles
OBSTACLES

1. LOW MOTIVATION

  • INVOLUNTARY CONSUMER
  • SECONDARY MOTIVATION: IE. KEEP PARTNER FROM LEAVING OR TESTIFYING

MOST Perpetrators. AND Victims HAVE INSECURE ATTACHMENTS>AFFECTING THE WAY THEY REGULATE ATTACHMENT. BECAUSE OF THESE DEFENSE MECHANISMS>RESULTS IN CREATING MORE EMOTIONAL DISTANCE BETWEEN SELF AND OTHER.

  • Perpetrators MAY PULL FOR NEGATIVE REACTIONS IN THEIR THERAPISTS.
obstacles for the therapist
OBSTACLES FOR THE THERAPIST
  • Balancing client’s needs for privacy with criminal justices needs for information
  • Therapists anxiety about exposure to liability working with a high risk population may compromise comfort and availability
therapeutic alliance1
THERAPEUTIC ALLIANCE
  • Client , on the one hand, elevates the therapist to a position of authority
  • On the other hand, client believes power and authority is shared between them
  • A deep sense of collaboration and participation occurs in the process
  • A positive attachment develops, yet this is rarely true for the perpetrator due to maladaptive defenses
attachment
ATTACHMENT
  • Attachment is a tie or bond that binds two people and serves a psychological and biological function across a life span.
  • The biological function = both physical protection and the development of neurobiological capacities in the developing brain of the infant.
attachment1
Attachment
  • The psychological function = development of the self & an understanding of self in relationship to others.
  • For the adult, the biological function can be physical protection but also psychological protection. As emotional caretaking allows the adult the freedom to go out and explore their world.
attachment2
ATTACHMENT
  • For adult partners, each person can be the caregiver and the care receiver.
  • Balance of these roles varies from relationship to relationship.
characteristics of attachment relationships
CHARACTERISTICS OF ATTACHMENT RELATIONSHIPS
  • PROXIMITY MAINTENANCE
  • ONE WANTS TO BE CLOSE IN PROXIMITY
  • ONE FEELS LOSS WHEN ONE IS AWAY
  • THERE MAY BE ANGER AND FRUSTRATION AT REUNION
slide13

IRONIC SAFE HAVEN

  • ONE RETREATS TO ANGER AND FRUSTRATION WHEN FEELING ANXIOUS AND FEARFUL.
  • ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OFFER A SECURE BASE TO RETURN “HOME” TO.
attachment theory
ATTACHMENT THEORY
  • BOWLBY AND AINSWORTH BELIEVED THAT
  • SECURE ATTACHMENTS DEVELOP DUE TO
  • MATERNAL AND PATERNAL SENSITIVITY AND

COOPERATION.

sensitivity
SENSITIVITY
  • CAREGIVERS ability to accurately interpret the infants ever changing need. To accurately read the infant and to respond accordingly within a timeliness.
4 components of sensitivity
4 components of sensitivity
  • Awareness of signals
  • Accurate interpretations
  • Appropriate response
  • Prompt response
cooperation
COOPERATION
  • Do interventions break into, cut across, or interrupt the infants ongoing activity or are they geared in both timing & quality to the child’s state, mood, & current interests?
facilitating secure attachments
Facilitating secure attachments
  • Sensitivity & cooperation are the basis for healthy parent child/child interactions.
  • If this process breaks down the child experiences a break in the connection, or feels ignored, or intruded upon
  • When there is misattunement which occurs with frequency…the child becomes anxious (escalated) or cut-off (avoidant).
attachments
ATTACHMENTS
  • Understanding your client’s attachment status is critical to breaking long held beliefs about close relationships or what Bowlby described as the internal working models of self and other”.
daniel siegel process of emotion
DANIEL SIEGEL :PROCESS OF EMOTION
  • THE BODY KNOWS WHAT ITS FEELING BEFORE THE MIND KNOWS
  • THE MIND PICKS UP THE MESSAGE RELAYING: “PAY ATTENTION, THIS IS IMPORTANT!”
  • THE MIND MAKES A DECISION—THIS IS GOOD OR THIS IS BAD(MOOD)
  • THIS PROCESS OF AFFECT(MOOD) CAN BE ELABORATED INTO CATEGORIES OF AFFECT:
categories of affect
CATEGORIES OF AFFECT
  • ANGER
  • FEAR
  • SURPRIZE
  • DISGUST
  • JOY
  • EXCITEMENT
  • SHAME
  • SEE NOTES ON SHAME(CLASS SET)
slide23

MOST COMUNICATIONS BETWEEN INFANT and PARENTS OR ADULTS IS PRIMARY AFFECT AS OPPOSES TO CATEGORICAL AFFECT.

  • MUCH IS SAID WITHOUT SAYING IT.
positive parenting
POSITIVE PARENTING
  • THOSE who grew up in healthy families where primary emotions/positive affect was shared and negative emotions/ primary affects soothed constructively are more sensitive to themselves and others.
less positive parenting
LESS POSITIVE PARENTING
  • THOSE WITH LESS POSITIVE PARENTING ARE QUITE OUT OF TOUCH WITH OR UNABLE TO ARTICULATE THEIR PRIMARY AFFECTS AND THEIR CATEGORICAL EMOTIONS.
  • MUCH OF WHAT THEY ARE FEELING IS COMMUNICATED BEHAVIORALLY RATHER THAN WITH WORDS.
  • NOR ARE THEY SENSITIVE TO THE EMOTIONS OF OTHERS
in therapy
IN THERAPY
  • Many clients have not learned the language of primary affect nor the language of categorical emotion
  • Many cannot discern primary affect communicated via facial expression, eye gaze, tone of voice, body motion, and timing of responses.
in therapy1
IN THERAPY

THIS CAN BE:

  • TAUGHT
  • REFLECTED
  • PRACTICED
in therapy2
In therapy
  • Clients feel understood because their state of mind is being “felt” by another.
  • discussion & movie excerpt :IN THE BEDROOM
what constitutes motivation for change
WHAT CONSTITUTES MOTIVATION FOR CHANGE
  • PRECONTEMPATION
  • CONTEMPLATION
  • PREPARATION
  • ACTION
  • MAINTENANCE
  • RELAPSE PREVENTION AND RESPONSE
an incorrect mystique
AN INCORRECT MYSTIQUE
  • The idea that all individuals are in complete control of their behavior stems from the socio-political perspective that emphasizes
  • Power
  • Control
  • Self-will
  • Accountability
  • discussion
slide35

THE VAST MAJORITY OF BATTERERS NEED MORE THAN JUST THE MESSAGE: “ USE VIOLENCE…GO TO JAIL”.

slide37

Violence is a function of a complex interaction of biological, psychological, and social processes that require complex interventions.

  • Change takes time
  • New opportunities arise for deepening the work
  • Learning new coping skills
  • Refining and personalizing interventions
  • Securing safety
common psychological diagnoses
COMMON PSYCHOLOGICAL DIAGNOSES
  • Depression, anxiety or both
  • Psychoactive substance abuse and dependency
  • Posttraumatic stress disorder
  • Neurobiological disorders
  • Personality disorders
dutton s battery typology
DUTTON’S BATTERY TYPOLOGY
  • OVER-CONTROLLED: deny rage while experiencing chronic frustration an resentment
  • UNDERCONTROLLED: act out frequently
  • INSTRUMENTAL: use violence “coldly” to obtain specific objectives
  • IMPULSIVE:
  • act out in response to a buiding inner psychological tension
conditional model of violence prediction
Conditional model of violence prediction
  • Individual biological/psychological factors:
  • History of violence
  • Substance abuse
  • Need for medication
  • Psychiatric disorders
social environmental factors
SOCIAL/ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS
  • PEER support for violence(ie. Gangs)
  • Economic stressors
  • Occupational stressors
ratioanal for using attachment theory
RATIOANAL FOR USING ATTACHMENT THEORY
  • Violence occurs in the context of attachment relationships
  • Anger and loss associated with maintenance of proximity
  • Very high rates amongst batterers with insecure attachment
  • High rates of childhood trauma among perpetrators and victims of violence(30-50% among victims).
parents and children
PARENTS AND CHILDREN
  • Most parents, in their efforts to help their children, focus attention:
  • on decoding the child’s behavior yielding an expertise about the child
  • but also a blindness to their own contribution.
power
POWER
  • Violence is an ugly form of power in the face of which we all feel threatened.
  • 2 forms of violence
  • Violence to achieve a goal = coercive
  • Pleading violence in which the victimizer perceives himself/herself to be the victim
divorce
divorce
  • Children of divorce do scary things.
  • They have seen parents stop loving each other.
  • The possibility of abandonment terrifies them
  • Competition with new members ( step families) becomes very serious business, it’s survival of the fittest.
rollo may s levels of power
Rollo May’s levels of power

These levels of power are seen as potentialities within everyone:

The power to be-neither good nor evil, but NOT neutral.

Power is energy. This energy must be lived out or it results impotently in death, neurosis, psychosis, or violence

rollo m ay power
Rollo May:Power
  • Self affirmation: I am, I matter
  • Self –assertion: that which emerges against opposition to self-affirmation
  • Aggression- as opposed to asserting ones self, “this is me, this is mine”, moves into positions of power, prestige, the territory of another—a taking possession of some of it for one’s self.
  • Violence: ineffectual aggression can lead to a physical explosion with access to reasoning and persuasion being blocked off.
innocence
INNOCENCE
  • PARADOXICALLY, ONE WAY OF CONFRONTING ONES POWERLESSNESS,
  • is by making it a seeming virtue;
  • by consciously divesting one’s self of ones power and proclaiming that divestiture as a virtue.
  • This is known as pseudoinnocence
2 nd kind of innocence
2nd KIND OF INNOCENCE
  • A quality of imagination, a childlike clarity of freshness in adulthood often carried by the artist or the poet yielding a freshness, a newness, a wonder or a spirituality
  • WITHOUT

sacrificing the realism of one’s perception of evil, one’s complicity with evil. Rollo May call this authentic innocence.

barbara whitmer the violence mythos
BARBARA WHITMER: THE VIOLENCE MYTHOS
  • Western culture has a fundamental lack of understanding of trauma for the self, the other, the collective yielding:
  • The interpretation of violence as innate
  • A lack of resources to heal from trauma and to prevent trauma
2 ways of learning violence
2 ways of learning violence
  • Direct experience
  • Vicarious experience (observational).
behavior
Behavior
  • Behavior is conditioned by:
  • Cognitive appraisal
  • Modes of learned response
  • Effectiveness of behavior within a matrix of social relationships
  • Expectations of social acceptability, tolerance and cost.
slide59

Whitmer’s lenses is that of the “self” and relational rather than motivated by intrapsychic factors of instinct, brain centers, or aggressive energy.

  • She draws upon reports from the Viet Nam War where PTSD resulted from the fear of killing rather than the fear of being killed.
  • Whitmer believes that acquired aggression depends on biological factors, where as the habit of aggression depends on previous learning.
the violence mythos
THE VIOLENCE MYTHOS
  • THE MYTHOLOGICAL and symbolic tradition of violence includes beliefs in:
  • Necessary violence in times of famine and war
  • Necessary violence as innate in instincts
  • Salvivic violence
  • The hero archetype and attitudes of domination & subservience of women, others(non-white), animals and nature
  • Institutionalization of war as primary mode of social change i.e.. War on drugs, war on poverty, etc.
freud
Freud
  • Freud viewed the aggressive impulse differently from Ricoeur with respect to Western culture which describes life energy as belligerent and overpowering
  • How force is determined depends upon the values that have been placed upon the mysterious, the unknown, the uncontrollable by the society .
to look at violence one must first look at desire
To look at violence one must first look at desire
  • Desire is the strong longings or hopes for something. The achievement of which produces joy, satisfaction.
  • Degrees of desire:
  • Want: felt need or lack
  • Wish: vague or passing longing
  • Crave: force of physical appetite or emotional need
  • Covet: inordinate and envious desire for what belongs to another
freud2
FREUD
  • Equilibrium of unpleasure yields(>) tension yields(>) pleasure =lowering of tension
  • Repression=defense against connecting with a hostile memory image
  • For Whitmer, the hostile memory image, not the death instinct, yields the compulsion to repeat destructive acts to self and other.
freud3
FREUD
  • FOR FREUD: Desire lies within the organism of self undulating between expression and repression creating distortion of unrecognizable expressions of the unconscious
  • It (the psyche) lacks a mechanism for recognition of the relational , hence is deterministic.
for ricoeur
For Ricoeur
  • Because wishes are a demand on another person, they are psychosocial
  • The other is the aim of the demand.
  • The subject is also the recipient of the response of the other
  • The interpretation of the demand can be varied
  • The demand may or may not be recognized, fulfilled, accepted, returned with a counter demand
ricoeur cont
Ricoeur Cont.
  • In order for the subject to discern if the demand has been fulfilled, the subject must be able to discern the others response
  • The degree of success/failure depends on the degree of trust
freud ricoeur
Freud & Ricoeur
  • Both Feud & Ricouer agree that faulty desire determines human aggression.
  • Rollo may believe impotency determines aggression.
  • All agree that self-formation is motivated by and attained through conflict and struggle, with an unconscious impulse to aggress in the struggle for self-realization with another.
ericson
Ericson
  • In infancy, the orientation of trust/mistrust is forged via the relationship of infant/caregiver adequately or inadequately meeting the infants needs.
  • This early somatic, non-linguistic memory sis reverted to on the shattering of trauma
  • Early mistrust is accompanied by an experience of total rage, with fantasies of destruction and domination.
ericson cont
Ericson cont.
  • Early trust is accompanied by a sense of hope, faith, and inter-related goodness between inner and outer worlds.
  • Trauma shatters the mind’s ability to process new information and update the the inner schemata of self and world.
  • Unassimilated traumatic memories are stored in active memory creating an intrinsic tendency to repeat the representation of contents.
ericson1
Ericson
  • Reliving trauma carries the same emotional intensity as the original trauma
  • The compulsion to repeat represents spontaneous healing attempts to restore efficacy an power.
  • The shattering of the mind’s inner schema of linguistic signification shatters also the mind’s cognitive layer of organization.
language and trauma
LANGUAGE AND TRAUMA
  • Linguistic signification requires the literal,
  • Then the somatic to be signified symbolically
  • then applied to the new experience.
  • This creates a pattern of expectation and response.
  • This allows the self to learn vicariously and to cope.
language and trauma cont
LANGUAGE AND TRAUMA CONT.
  • Coping allows one to increase their chances of survival by NOT having to re-experience the life-threatening event Again or itself,
  • but to learn from the successful survival experience of another.
  • Ericson believes that the inner schema is language oriented.
  • However, Daniel Stearn does NOT agree.
  • He believes that language is but one line of the matrix within the schema. For him Schema pre-dates language.
ericson and language cont
Ericson and Language Cont.
  • Belief:
  • Until there is a means to signify the trauma event( name it, understand it) there is perpetual repetition
  • The act of telling the story to a witness in safety can change the abnormal processing of trauma.
  • Terror is reversed through words.
slide78

Freud couldn’t account for the stuck, repetition compulsion he called “the death instinct.

  • Eventually he looked to the biological working of neurons. His research is followed more closely here today than ever. Ever since the invention of the MRI.
  • Watch 1st. Movie Segment: In The Bedroom
sternberg s triangular theory of love
STERNBERG’S TRIANGULAR THEORY OF LOVE
  • 8 Types of Love dependant upon combinations of three elements:
  • INTIMACY
  • PASSION
  • COMMITMENT
sternberg
STERNBERG
  • INTIMACY: How much of your hopes, dreams,, fears, and secrets are shared
  • PASSION: level of sexual attraction felt
  • COMMITMENT: your willingness to commit to a life together
8 types of possible love
8 Types of Possible Love
  • Non-love: all 3 missing
  • Liking (intimacy only)
  • Infatuated Love (Passion only)
  • Empty Love ( Commitment only)
  • Romantic Love: (intimacy + passion)
  • Compassionate Love ( intimacy + commitment)
  • Fatuous Love (passion + commitment)
  • Consummate Love (intimacy + passion+commitment)
developmental tasks for generating a good marriage by judith wallerstein
DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS FOR GENERATING A GOOD MARRIAGE BY JUDITH WALLERSTEIN
  • The couple needs to separate from their family of origin( discuss cultural differences).
  • Couple must build togetherness through mutual identification and shared intimacy.
  • Couple must nurture a rich and pleasurable sex life.
  • Couples who choose to have kids must embrace parenthood yet protect the privacy of their lives.
  • The couple must confront and master the crises of life
  • Couple need to create a safe haven for the expression of differences, anger and conflict.
wallerstein cont
Wallerstein Cont.
  • They should use laughter and humor to keep things in perspective and avoid boredom by sharing fun, interests, and friends
  • They must provide nurturance, and comfort for each other
  • They must keep alive the early romantic, idealized images of falling in love while facing the sober realities of the change wrought over time.
in the bedroom
IN THE BEDROOM
  • THE FOLLOWING MOVIE WILL NEED TO BE WATCHED IN ITS ENTIRETY.
  • IF YOU MISS A SEGMENT IN CLASS PLEASE RENT TO VIEW FOR YUR PAPER.
in the bedroom1
IN THE BEDROOM
  • SEGMENT TWO:
  • CLASS DISCUSSION
  • LOOKING TO THE DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS OF MARRIAGE, CONSIDER THE MANIFESTATION OF THESE TASKS WITH REGARD TO THE MARRIED COUPLE (SPACEK AND WILKINSON)
doing couple s therapy by toby bobes barbara rothman
DOING COUPLE’S THERAPYby Toby Bobes & Barbara Rothman
  • Conviction: “ Healing and growth occur from understanding the health and strength of the relationship rather than examining its pathology
  • Discussion
the shift from linear to circular systemic
THE SHIFT FROM LINEAR TO CIRCULAR & SYSTEMIC
  • SEE NOTES FROM QUANTUM PHYSICS
  • SEE VIDEO: “SOUL”
bobes rothman assumptions
BOBES & ROTHMAN ASSUMPTIONS
  • The couple & family are the clients
  • Change in one family member affects entire system
  • Transgenerational patterns
  • Focus is on circular causality not linear
  • Interactional patterns focused on in here and now
bobes rothman cont
BOBES & ROTHMAN CONT.
  • Family is a system with:
  • Interdependent parts
  • Boundaries mark part distinctions
  • Its an organization that struggles to maintain equilibrium
bowen
Bowen
  • The differentiation of the self both intrapsychically and interpersonally is key:
  • Hold onto self while remaining in close proximity to significant other
  • Use of triangle to relieve anxiety when the dyad is too intense
bowen cont
BOWEN CONT
  • Partner with someone of similar level of differentiation and this causes:
  • Marital conflict
  • Spouse dysfunction
  • Child dysfunction
continued
CONTINUED
  • Projection causes undifferentiated parents to focus on the most vulnerable child. Triangulating him/her to stabilize the relationship
  • Multigenerational patterns
  • Cut-off
  • Birth order
  • Societal regression
object relations theory
OBJECT RELATIONS THEORY
  • All of us internalize our early relational experiences with our primary caretakers. This influences how we perceive objective reality in adulthood with regard to:
  • Soothing/accepting
  • Frustration/rejection
object relations cont
Object Relations Cont.
  • Painful experiences that are too much to bear create split-offs or denial
  • These elements are then stored in the unconscious until a relationship triggers or activates the old wound.
  • The past is alive in the present
case study
CASE STUDY
  • FRANK’S AUTOBIOGRAPHY
object relations continued
OBJECT RELATIONS CONTINUED
  • Internal family relationships strongly influence:
  • Perceptions
  • Behaviors
  • interactions
object relations
OBJECT RELATIONS
  • PEOPLE REPEAT PATTERNS AND BEHAVIORS LEARNED AS CHILDREN
  • INTERNAL images or disowned aspects of self are projected onto another person The other person unconsciously accepts the projection and behaves as if it were his/her own
  • The work of therapy is to separate individual internal worlds for actual relationships today
object relations cont1
OBJECT RELATIONS CONT.
  • Change occurs when unconscious processes become conscious & people become empowered to make new choices
  • discussion
postmodern costructivism
POSTMODERN COSTRUCTIVISM
  • The way we see the world is a personally peculiar way of looking that has been shaped by language
  • The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves, give meaning to our lives.
  • Therefore language creates meaning around events and thereby creates reality
postmodernism cont
POSTMODERNISM CONT
  • The focus of therapy need to be the stories the clients tell and the collaborative conversations NOT the interactive repetitive patterns
  • The spirit of therapy is collaborative NOT one of expertise
postmodernism cont1
POSTMODERNISM CONT.
  • The linguistic separation of the person from the problem creates a person’s story, which has become their problemed identity.
  • This can be rewritten, first by externalizing the problem
developmental family life stages
Developmental family life-stages
  • Developmental stages of the individual, couple& family must be viewed simultaneously
  • The navigation through developmental stages creates the opportunity to address issues of grief and loss re: endings and new beginnings
erikson s 8 stages of development
Erikson’s 8 stages of development
  • Infancy: trust vs. distrust
  • Early childhood: autonomy vs. shame/doubt
  • Play age: initiate vs. guilt
  • School age: industry vs. inferiority
  • Adolescence: identity vs. identity confusion
  • Young adulthood: intimacy vs. isolation
  • Middle adulthood: generativity vs. self-absorption
  • Senescence: integrity vs. despair
attachment theory meets systems theory
Attachment theory meets systems theory
  • The most robust predictors of a child’s attachment capabilities is the state of mind re: attachment of the caregiver vis a vis their own parents.
attachment3
ATTACHMENT
  • Attachment & the brain from birth to 2(and beyond)
  • Attachment relationships help the immature brain to develop important capacities related to interpersonal functioning
  • In the prefrontal cortex:
attachment the brain cont
Attachment & the Brain Cont.
  • In the prefrontal cortex:
  • Societal cognition
  • Response flexibility
  • Emotion regulation
  • Reflective functioning
  • Autonoetic functioning
attachment categories
Attachment categories
  • Secure
  • Anxious-avoidant
  • Anxious-ambivalent
  • Disorganized(afraid of caregiver) = fear without solution
bequeathed attachment styles
BEQUEATHED ATTACHMENT STYLES
  • Secure adults engender secure children
  • Dismissing adults engender avoidant relationships with their kids
  • Pre-occupied adults engender ambivalent attachment in their children
  • Adults with unresolved trauma or disorganized attachments may act frighteningly or chaotically with their kids engendering disorganized attachment in their kids
secure attachment patterns by hazan shaver
SECURE ATTACHMENT PATTERNSby Hazan & Shaver
  • Highly invested in relationships
  • Tend to have long, stable relationships
  • Characterized by trust and friendship
  • Seek support under stress and are responsive to support
  • Empathic & supportive to others
  • Flexible when in conflict
  • High-self esteem( not shame based)
pre occupied style of attachment
PRE-OCCUPIED STYLE OF ATTACHMENT
  • Attempts to keep track of and hold onto partners> backfire>hurt feelings, anger, insecurity
  • Obsessed with romantic partners
  • Extreme jealousy
  • Break up --reunite
  • Worry about rejection
  • Intrusive and controlling
  • Assert own needs
  • History of being victimized by bullies
dismissing attachment style
Dismissing attachment style
  • Grows out of a relationship with a caregiver who does not provide: contact, comfort, soothing> defensive self-reliance/ cool distant relationships with partners/ cool or hostile relationships with peers
dismissing cont
DISMISSING CONT.
  • UN-INVESTED IN ROMANTIC PARTNERS
  • HIGH BREAKUP RATE
  • LOW LEVEL OF GRIEVING
  • WITHDRAWS UNDER EMOTIONAL STRESS
  • IGNORES OR DENIES PROBLEMS
  • CRITICAL OF PARTNERS NEEDS
  • HISTORY OF BULLYING
disorganized style
DISORGANIZED STYLE
  • A result of conflicted, disorganized, disoriented behavior of a frightening caregiver > desperate, ineffective attempts to regulate attachment anxiety through approach and avoidance
disorganized patterns of behavior
Disorganized patterns of behavior
  • Introverted
  • Unassertive
  • Feels exploited
  • Lacks both self-confidence and is self-conscious
  • Feels negative about self
  • Anxious, depressed, hostile, violent
  • Self-defeating
  • Reports physical illness(somatic)
  • Fluctuates between neediness and withholding
the domestic violence dance
THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE DANCE
  • TENSION
  • EXPLOSION
  • HONEYMOON
  • THE DYSFUNCTIONAL MODULATION OF CLOSENESS AND DISTANCING
domestic violence
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
  • All of the energy tied up in the dance of violence interferes with the confrontation of the necessary realities of loss
  • Interferes with assimilation: the re-identifying of the self in the world which necessitates secondary losses in ones roles
  • Interferes with reinvesting the self in the world in a different way
domestic violence1
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
  • INETERFERES WITH TRANSFORMATION
  • Exposes children to the impact , trauma, and chaos of violence and interferes with their observation of “healthy loss” coping skills and modeling of transformation
domestic violence2
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
  • AMBIVALENT REPONSE TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE MINIMIZES THE VIOLENCE
  • DISCUSSION
behavioralist view
BEHAVIORALIST ‘ VIEW
  • Behavioralists view symptoms as learned responses
  • They concentrate on the symptoms themselves and look for responses that reinforce problem behavior
behavioral cont
Behavioral Cont
  • Intermittent reinforcement is the most resistant to change
  • discussion
behavioral cont1
Behavioral cont
  • Reciprocal reinforcement
  • Aversive control: nagging, crying, withdrawing
  • Poor problems solving skills
  • Lack of reinforcement for adaptive strivings
working behaviorally with domestic violence
Working behaviorally with domestic violence
  • Teaching how to communicate about a problem
  • Teaching how to change the topic, not to sidetrack
  • Teaching how to phrase wishes, complaints clearly, specifically, concretely
  • Teaching how not to respond to complains with counter complaints, i.e. : cross-complaining, name calling
  • Teaching breathing
  • Teaching listening( with out interior responding)
  • Teaching how to tolerate open space for energy of tension
  • Teaching how to hold reactivity
working behaviorally
Working behaviorally
  • Recognizing schemas:
  • Beliefs, myths, roles, “shoulds” are the basis of :
  • Self-fulfilling prophesies
  • Mind reading
  • Jealousy
  • bad faith
working behaviorally cont
Working behaviorally cont.
  • Cognitive distortions:
  • Arbitrary inference=Conclusions drawn with out supporting evidence
  • Selective abstraction= certain details are highlighted and others are not
  • Overgeneralizations+ isolated incident is taken , interpreted, felt as always, never.
  • Exaggeration or minimization
  • Personalization
  • Dichotonomous thinking—black and white
behavioralism continued
Behavioralism continued
  • Labeling
  • Mind reading
forgiveness
Forgiveness
  • To forgive is to will the well-being of victim and violator in the fullest knowledge of the violation
  • Forgiveness is the exercise of transcendence through memory, empathy, & imagination
forgiveness1
forgiveness
  • It is the hope of our humanity—since it wields the power to break the cycle of violence
  • The event off forgiveness is a lifetime investment in naming ourselves as we are
  • And as we can be in the continuing evolution of our humanity
  • see excerpt from film: Dead Man Walking
forgiveness2
Forgiveness
  • Well-being for the violator may include:
  • Coping with rage and hatred within
  • Learning how to forgive (which is a difficult process) her/his abusers
  • Learning how to name one’s guilt
  • Learning how to forgive the self and others
  • Learning how to reach out in caring
forgiveness3
Forgiveness
  • Recognizes:
  • That for good or ill, there is an intertwining of victim and violator
  • There is the well-being of one affecting the well-being of the other
forgiveness4
Forgiveness
  • Entwining:
  • Entwining occurs well-after the violation.
  • Violence does not end with the act of violation.
  • It insinuates itself into the ongoing experience of the victim.
  • Violation therefore robs time, the future by forcing new experiences to conform to the contours of the old.
forgiveness continued
Forgiveness Continued
  • The victim is joined to the violator thru the interior repetition of the violation.
  • From a process point of view: the psychic continuation of a violation of the past into the present involves the victim, who, in some small way, maintains THE VITALITY OF THE VIOLATION, UNWILLINGLY.
forgivness cont
FORGIVNESS CONT.
  • Hence the victim comes to loath the self insofar as it experiences itself as psychically joined to the violator.
  • This is NOT to blame the victim, but to grasp the process, the power by which violence ensnares the psyche of the victim.
  • DISCUSSION
forgiveness5
FORGIVENESS
  • VIOLENCE MAY HAPPEN IN AN INSTANT BUT IT SEEKS A LIFETIME LEASE
violence cont
VIOLENCE CONT.
  • To will ones own well-being is to:
  • 1. will that the violence be relegated to the past as objective memory.
  • 2. to no longer have the violence be continued in the subjective experience of the present.
difficulties cont
Difficulties cont.
  • Due to the sense of violation: insisting upon retribution or restitution based upon the point of view that there is a division of victims and violators.
  • To break the world into victims and violators ignores depth of each person’s participation in the cultural sin”.
  • discussion
difficulties cont1
Difficulties cont.
  • Remembrance of “sin” in the context of vengeance is NOT the same a remembrance in the context of forgiveness.
  • The difference is the WILL toward well-being as opposed to ill-being.
  • It involves transformation as opposed to ill-being
difficulties cont2
Difficulties cont
  • There simply are no innocents
  • discussion
difficulties cont3
Difficulties cont.
  • Transformation vs. destruction: one seeks a new future/the other perpetuates the past.
dilemma cont
Dilemma cont.
  • Accepting the will towards ones own well-being creates a loss of the “internalized” guilty self.
  • In the freeze frame of trauma, there is a stoppage of time ad a stoppage of ones own total development
dilemma cont1
Dilemma cont.
  • So, the refusal of forgiveness is not only:
  • The absolution of the past self
  • The distortion of each successive present to fit the constructed parameters of the past
  • But, the loss of the whole self vis a vis relationships
forgiveness6
forgiveness
  • Forgiveness promotes the release from guilt as a stuck place thus freeing the atrophied self
  • In an inter-dependant world, willing ones own well-being is simultaneously willing the well-being of others.
forgiveness cont
Forgiveness cont.
  • Thru the transcendence of memory, one differentiates one’s self from absorption into the past, allowing for the openness to claim a fuller past, one that contextualizes violence.
  • Thru empathy one gains the ability to separate self from other, to “see” the other as they are and as they are in relationship to one’s self.
forgiveness the imaginal
Forgiveness & the imaginal
  • It is thru the imagination that the will to well-being can move into visions of well-being thus creating the very empowerment to work on well-being.
religion forgiveness
Religion & forgiveness
  • For those patients who are religious the paradigm can be this:
  • EVERPRESENT truth, love and beauty form a criterion of well-being
  • They also form / inform memory, empathy and imagination
  • Divine character is forgiveness
religion forgiveness1
Religion & forgiveness
  • THE DIVINE does not have a past
  • THE DEVINE contains the past
  • Hence THE DEVINE has no memory, in that memory indicates a past.
  • But, THE DEVINE has truth, in that truth is the fullest knowledge of all that has ever been
  • Within THE DEVINE, beauty and imagination converge.
religion forgiveness2
RELIGION & forgiveness
  • The imagination of The Devine is an ever-changing vision of beauty wherein all manner of things shall be well
  • The human often cannot afford the vulnerability of acceptance and love due to the power of the violation/violator over us, interfering with the will toward well-being.
  • But The Devine has no such limitation hence all violators are invited into the great transformation that is God
  • The Devine IS the living activity of truth, love and beauty. Hence It is forgiveness and hence the lure towards our own modes of forgiveness. This is not a mandate it is a pull.
  • A pull to participate in the nature of The Devine.
religion forgivenss
RELIGION & FORGIVENSS
  • It is also a pull toward the beauty and reciprocal well-being and the hope of transformation mediated through memory, empathy& imagination luring us away from violence.
religion forgiveness3
Religion & forgiveness
  • Convergence of empathy and love:
  • For the human, empathy does not require law, in order to feel the otherness of the other.
  • For The Devine, who re-contextualizes and resurrects the world, empathy and love converge.
  • SEE FINAL SEGMENT OF IN THE BEDROOM