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BEST PRACTICES

A CHAPLAIN’S CALLING - Caring For THE GRIEVING heart Thursday, October 16, 2015 South Carolina Society of Chaplains Session #3 Speaker: Rev. Dr. Terry Irish, D. Min., BCC City of Hope National Medical Center Duarte, California. BEST PRACTICES. Blessing of the Hands. Tea for the Soul.

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BEST PRACTICES

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  1. A CHAPLAIN’S CALLING -Caring For THE GRIEVING heartThursday, October 16, 2015South Carolina Society of ChaplainsSession #3Speaker: Rev. Dr. Terry Irish, D. Min., BCCCity of Hope National Medical CenterDuarte, California

  2. BEST PRACTICES

  3. Blessing of the Hands

  4. Tea for the Soul

  5. BEHAVIORAL ADJUSTMENT

  6. BEHAVIORAL ADJUSTMENT

  7. BEHAVIORAL ADJUSTMENT

  8. RELAXATION EXERCISES

  9. ADDRESSINGSUICIDE

  10. September is National Suicide Prevention Month Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph. D. Center for Loss and Life Transition373 Broken Bow Road Fort Collins, Colorado 80526 (970) 226-6050 books@centerforloss.com

  11. Suicide Quiz Key • 1. According to national statistics, nearly how many Americans committed suicide in 2011? c. 40,000 • TRUE OR FALSE: More people died from suicide than homicide in the United States in 2011? a. TRUE • TRUE OR FALSE: Based on the number of suicides in the United States in 2011, it is among the top 10 causes of death? a. TRUE • According to national statistics, a death due to suicide occurs approximately every ____ minutes in the United States? a. 13  • 5. TRUE OR FALSE: Based on the number of suicides in the United States in 2011, it is #10, falling well-short of the top 2, #1 heart disease and #2 cancer among the top 10 causes of death? (#1 Heart disease - 596,577; #2 Cancer - 576,691; #10 Suicide - 39,518) a. TRUE

  12. Suicide Quiz Key • 6. TRUE OR FALSE: Based on gender, males are more than three times more likely to commit suicide than females in the United States in 2011. a. TRUE (Males – 78.5%; Females – 21.5%) • 7. TRUE OR FALSE: The state with the highest suicide rate in 2011 was Wyoming at 23.2, followed closely by Alaska at 23.1. South Carolina is a distant 28th at 13.8, while California is 44th at 10.5 and the District of Columbia is 51st at 6.8. a. TRUE • TRUE OR FALSE: At 12.8, 1987 was the year with the highest suicide rate since records started being kept in 1981, and 2000 had the lowest rate with 10.4. • a. TRUE • 9. Rank the following Top Three methods of suicide according to 2010 statistics: • a. Poisoning – 3rd (17.3%) b. Suffocation (including hanging) – 2nd (24.8%) c. Firearms – 1st (50.6%) • 10. Rank the following Age Groups for suicide according to 2011 statistics: • >14 – 6th (0.5%) b. 15-24 – 5th (11%) c. 25-44 – 3rd (15.5%) • d. 45-64 – 1st (18.8%) e. 65-84 – 4th (15.1%) f. 85+ – 2nd (16.9%)

  13. Suicide Quiz Key 11.TRUE OR FALSE: The ethnic group with the highest suicide rate in 2011 was white, at 14.5, followed by the American Indians/Alaskan native population at 10.6. However, it should be noted that despite representing about 2% of the overall population, Native Americans have the 2nd highest suicide rate. a. TRUE 12. TRUE OR FALSE: The estimated annual cost of suicide deaths in the U.S., taking into account lost wages and productivity, is $34 billion. Another $8 billion is the estimated cost for non-fatal self-harm injuries, including medical care and economic costs. a. TRUE 13. TRUE OR FALSE: In 2010, emergency departments had 713,000 visits for self-inflicted injuries. a. TRUE 14. TRUE OR FALSE: In suicide rates by countries per 100,000 people for the most recent years available, South Korea was #1 with 24.7, the U.S. was #18 with 10.1, and Greece was 26th (lowest of countries surveyed) with 2.9. a. TRUE

  14. Suicide Warning Signs When should you worry about yourself or a loved one? Look out for these signs: • Talking about wanting to die • Researching methods of suicide • Talk of hopelessness • Referring to self as a burden on others • Increased alcohol or drug use • Reckless behavior

  15. Suicide Warning Signs When should you worry about yourself or a loved one? Look out for these signs: (Continued) • Change in sleeping patterns (too much or too little) • Extreme mood swings • Self-isolation • Loss of interest in hobbies or activities • Sudden sense of calm in absence of therapeutic or medical intervention http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.orghttp://www.save.org

  16. Misunderstood Suicide Warning Signs The Puzzle Pieces… • Each family member/friend has puzzle piece, doesn’t understand how to interpret or add signs together • “Bequeathing “ – giving away entire CD collection to little sister • “Bequeathing “ – giving away other precious personal possessions • Telling Mom & Dad he finally had everything together • New cheerfulness following bad break-up with long time boy/girlfriend after weeks/months of deep depression • Quitting team in mid-season without explanation • Post-suicide: Everyone mourning – putting their puzzle pieces together "Suicide is a permanent response to a temporary problem.”

  17. Suicide: How Can You Help? • Call 911. • Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. • Speak to a local crisis agency. • Check yourself into the ER, or convince loved one to go to the hospital. • Keep person in crises away from weapons or other things they could use to harm themselves. http://www.save.org National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 800.273.8255 {24/7/365} www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org English & Spanish

  18. Suicide: What Can You Do?*P.L.A.I.D. P.A.L.S.

  19. Suicide: What Can You Do?*P.L.A.I.D. P.A.L.S.

  20. GRIEFSUPPORT

  21. “The Six Needs of Mourning” • Accept the reality of the death. “It’s as if the realness of what has happened waits around a corner. I don’t want to make the turn, yet I know I must. Slowly, I gather the courage to approach.” • Let yourself feel the pain of the loss. “I may try to protect myself from my sadness by not talking about my loss. I may even secretly hope that the person who died will come back if I don’t talk about it. Yet, as difficult as it is, I must feel it to heal it.” Wolfelt, 2003

  22. “The Six Needs of Mourning” • Remember the person who died. “The essence of finding meaning in the future is not to forget my past, as I have been told, but instead to embrace my past. For it is in listening to the music of the past that I can sing in the present and dance into the future.” • Develop a new self-identity. “Now I realize: I knew myself so little. This death has forced me to become reacquainted with myself. I must slow down and listen.” Wolfelt, 2003

  23. “The Six Needs of Mourning” • Search for meaning. “I must encounter my questions, my doubts, my fears. There is richness in these domains. As I explore them I don’t reinforce my tensions but instead release them. In this way I transcend my grief and discover new life beyond anything my heart could ever have comprehended. Oh, the gentleness of new life.” • Let others help you – now and always. “I heal, in part, by allowing others to express their love for me. By choosing to invite others into my journey, I move toward health and healing. If I hide from others, I hide from healing.” Wolfelt, 2003

  24. Other Grief Support Resources • Bereavement Support Groups • Grieving Rounds – “Hope Rounds” • C.A.R.E.S. Tool • Bereavement booklet, “When Someone You Love Dies … A Guide to Bereavement”

  25. QUESTIONS?

  26. THANK YOU Chaplain Terry Irish tirish@coh.org 626.256.4673 Ext. 85781 Pager 626.423.0023

  27. BIBLIOGRAPHY Bright, R. (1996) Grief and Powerlessness: Helping People Regain Control of Their Lives, (165-167). London: Kingsley. Ferrell, B. R., & Coyle, N. (Eds.). (2010). Textbook of palliative nursing (3rd ed.). New York, NY: Oxford University Press. Fitchett, G., & Canada, A. L. (2010). The Role of Religion/Spirituality in Coping with Cancer: Evidence, Assessment, and Intervention. In J. C. Holland (Ed.). Psycho-oncology, 2nd Edition. New York: Oxford University Press. Hooyman, N. R., & Kramer, B. J. (2006). Living Through Loss: Interventions Across the Life Span, (347-360). New York: Columbia University Press. Nichols, S.W. Mitigating Care Fatigue in Palliative Care Providers: Developing Self-Awareness and Self-Care. Archstone Foundation Grant Teleconference, March 4, 2012. Puchalski, CM, Ferrell, B, Virani, R, Otis-Green, S, Baird, P, Bull, J, Chochinov, H, Handzo, G, Nelson-Becker, H, Prince-Paul, M, Pugliese, K, Salmasy, D. Improving the Quality of Spiritual Care as a Dimension of Palliative Care: The Report of the Consensus Conference. J Palliat Med 2009; 12:885-904.

  28. BIBLIOGRAPHY Puchalski, CM, Ferrell, B. (2010). Making Healthcare Whole – Integrating Spirituality into Health Care. West Conshohocken, PA: Templeton Press. Puchalski, CM, Handzo, G, Prince-Paul, M, Otis-Green, S. Improving the Spiritual Domain of Palliative Care. American Academy of Hospice and Palliative Medicine, Preconference workshop, San Diego, March, 2014. Spiritual Care of the Nurse, CH (MAJ) Robin W. Pizanti, RN. Wolfelt, A. (1997). The Journey through Grief: Reflections on Healing. Fort Collins, CO, Companion Press. Wolfelt, A. (2002). Healing A Parent’s Grieving Heart. Fort Collins, CO, Companion Press. Wolfelt, A. (2003). Understanding Your Grief. Fort Collins, CO, Companion Press.

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