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November 19 th is. International Men’s Day. A good man, we are told,. …puts women and children first. …protects and provides. …promotes women’s empowerment at the expense of his own rights and those of fellow men . …offers his shoulder to cry on when women are in distress.

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November 19 th is

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November 19th is

International Men’s Day


A good man, we are told,

…puts women and children first

…protects and provides

…promotes women’s empowerment at the expense of

his own rights and those of fellow men

…offers his shoulder to cry on when women are in distress

…stifles emotion and endures pain without complaining


A good man, we must realize,

…is also more often

at the receiving end of abuse


A male victim of abuse

…is often met with disbelief .

…is often told,

"You must have done something terrible

to her to deserve this. "

…is often ridiculed,

"Look at your size! You are a man!

What do you mean she abuses you?"

The consequence

…several thousands of

abused and battered men

suffer in silent isolation

for the fear of being stigmatized

as weak and inept.


Media finds no incentive in highlighting

the truth about abused men

Netas and baaboos find

no financial or political mileage

to be gained from helping battered men


No one notices their silent tears

Nobody hears their muffled cries

…and hence

no laws have been passed

to protect men

from any form of domestic abuse


On the other hand, men are

…always projected as perpetrators of violence

…subjected to severe gender bias under law

…prevented from being a parent to their own children

when a marriage breaks down

… often falsely accused of domestic abuse,

rape and sexual harassment

…treated as guilty until proven innocent and

punished based on mere allegations

…threatened and subjected to “legal terrorism”

using laws like Indian Penal Code Section 498A

and Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act


Male victims of “legal terrorism”

…endure arrest and imprisonment for crimes

they have not committed

…witness their dear ones being jailed

for no fault of theirs

…often end up losing their jobs and

everything else they spent their life building

…suffer enormous pain due to separation

from their children

… often have to helplessly watch their

old parents wither away in humiliation and grief


The consequence…

Every year, twice as many married and separated men,

compared to women,

take their lives, unable to endure

verbal, emotional, economic and physical abuse


“legal terrorism”.


On the occasion of International Men’s Day, 2007,

let us remind ourselves that MEN

…who care, protect and provide for families

…who perform some of the most risky

and challenging jobs in the society

…who are our fathers, brothers, partners, sons,

male friends and colleagues

are human;

experience pain, emotions and tears;

deserve love, care and support

and NOT further abuse

from family, society, police and legal system