Sentence Expanding

1. Sentence Expanding Objective: As they begin Unit 2 (Reading Informational Text/Writing Argument) swbat evaluate the basis of sentence writing strategies and rhetorical devices, ultimately utilizing select concepts to help strengthen their own writing. Swbat to score a 5 or 6 on an argumentative writing based on the NJ Holistic scoring rubric. Do-Now: On the “Haves and the Have Nots”/On Classism

2. Sentence Expanding is a process for changing your sentences into like those of professional writers. It transforms reduced sentences into fully developed sentences. Reduced Sentence: • There stood two squat old-fashioned decanters of cut glass.

3. Reduced Sentence: • There stood two squat old-fashioned decanters of cut glass. • In the center of the table there stood, as sentries to a fruit-stand which upheld a pyramid of oranges and American apples, two squat old-fashioned decanters of cut glass, one containing port and the other dark sherry. • James Joyce, “The Dead”

4. We could rewrite Joyce’s sentence: • Two squat old-fashioned decanters stood there. They were in the center of the table. They were like sentries to a fruit-stand near them. The fruit-stand upheld a pyramid of oranges and American apples. One of the decanters contained port. The other one contained sherry. What are your thoughts on this rewrite?

5. The rewrite is uneconomical, using six sentences to express what Joyce did in just one sentence; it uses 44 words to Joyce’s 37. It’s poorly organized, failing to show as clearly as Joyce’s the interrelationships among the various objects described. It’s uninteresting, beginning each of the sentences in the same monotonous way.

6. Can an expanded sentence, like a balloon filled to over capacity, “burst”? • As long as a sentence is clear in meaning, it’s no over-expanded, regardless of how many words are in the sentence, regardless of how many different structures are present, regardless of how many ideas are packed into it.

7. Among American writers, William Faulkner is famous for the ultralong sentences that characterize his style. • The French writer Victor Hugo is often cited as having written one of the longest sentences ever, one that has hundreds of words, in Les Miserables. • The Irish wrier James Joyce went even further ending his novel Ulysses with a sentence that runs over twenty pages!

8. Even among professional writers, however, such ultralong sentences are rare. Still, on the average, sentences by professional writers are longer than those by students.

9. To practice adding expansions, substitute new ones for those in boldface. Original Expansions • In the center of the table there stood, as sentries to a fruit-stand which upheld a pyramid of oranges and American apples, two squat old-fashioned decanters of cut glass, one containing port and the other dark sherry. New Expansions On a shelf in the china closet there stood, like fragile sculptures which boasted an old age and genteel birth, two squat old-fashioned decanters of cut glass, one opened, the other unopened.

10. Now, in the morning air, her face was still before him. • Edith Wharton, Ethan Frome • Al was out already, unscrewing the steaming radiator cap with the tips of his fingers, jerking his hand away to escape the spurt when the cap should come loose. • John Steinbeck,The Grapes of Wrath • With them, carrying a gnarled walking stick, was Elmo Goodhue Pipgrass, the littlest, oldest man I had ever seen. • Max Shulman, “The Unlucky Winner”

11. Guided Practice: Expand the sentence at the slash marks. • She sprang dynamically to her feet, /(3), then swiftly and noiselessly crossed over to her bed, /(3), dragged out her suitcase. • F. Scott Fitzgerald, “Bernice Bobs Her Hair”

12. Original Sentence • She sprang dynamically to her feet, clinching her hands, then swiftly and noiselessly crossed over to her bed and, from underneath it, dragged out her suitcase. • F. Scott Fitzgerald, “Bernice Bobs Her Hair”

13. Guided Practice: Expand the sentence at the slash marks. • He stood there, /(4), and Rainsford, /(6), heard the general’s mocking laugh ring through the jungle. • Richard Connell, “The Most Dangerous Game”

14. Original Sentence • He stood there, rubbing his injured shoulder, and Rainsford, with fear again gripping his heart, heard the general’s mocking laugh ring through the jungle. • Richard Connell, “The Most Dangerous Game”