Download
1 / 33
330 likes | 334 Views
Learn how to assess the needs of aging family members, identify resources, and develop plans for meeting those needs. Discover strategies for engaging natural supports and balancing caregiving responsibilities. Understand the challenges and responsibilities of long distance caregiving and develop healthy boundaries with family members.
E N D
Learning Objectives: Participants will be able to • Assess what’s working and needs of aging family members • Identify and use resources to access needs and develop plans to meet those needs • Engage natural supports including siblings, other family members, friends, neighbors and others who live close in the community of aging family members • Develop a plan to balance responsibilities and taking care of yourself
Growth of Long Distance Caregiving • Changing demographics • Mobile families spread out across the country • Two career families • The demands of the “Sandwich Generation” • Daunting and complex responsibilities of long distance care Caregivers frequently report feeling guilty that they are not doing enough, and yet feel overwhelmed by what they are doing
Be Realistic! • You will not be able to do everything, but you will be able to do enough • Caregivers need help. Give yourself permission to ask for it! • Don’t define successful caregiving as “doing it all” • You will not be able to satisfy everyone’s expectations, but you will be able to help meet crucial needs • Develop healthy boundaries with family members
Other Caregivers Who Live Closer • If there is a caregiver who lives closer, communicate and coordinate with that person • Define who the ‘primary’ caregiver is who is making the majority of the decisions. • What does she or he think? • What can you do to support her or him? • Is this arrangement working? What steps can you take to improve it? • What do you do if the other caregiver does not want your help?
The most important factor in long distance care is assessment - clearly, objectively, and accurately identifying what is working and what the needs are. Assessment
Assessing From A Distance • Determine if your loved one needs help, a change, or improvement • To the fullest extent possible, plan with rather than for older adults, considering their interests and preferences as well as their needs Choice - Dignity - Respect
Handout: Long Distance Caregiver Assessment Phone Assessment • The telephone may be the most important tool in long distance caregiving • It may be over the phone that caregivers get the first hint that an older family member may be having health and other problems • Possible Communication Barriers • Exaggerating • Deny or minimize • How people see things differs • Remember, an objective third party can be an invaluable resource in long distance assessment
Handout: Family Caregiver Assessment Face-to-Face Assessment • Plan ahead: Schedule a non-emergency visit to observe and assess the situation • Look for changes in behavior, energy, & overall health • Depending on the older adult’s history, she/he may exaggerate, deny or underestimate problems. • Educate yourself about normal aging and notice changes in behavior and health. • For example, early signs of dementia can easily be dismissed as a “normal” part of aging, preventing early intervention.
What is the general health status? Is the person going to doctor appointments as needed? Is the older adult taking medications as prescribed? Is the older adult eating nutritious meals? Does the person have social contact outside home? Can the person still drive? If not, do they take a taxi or bus or ask for help? Is the environment safe and free of hazards? How well has the person adjusted to deaths, especially those of spouse and close friends or relatives? How well has the person adjusted to changes in living arrangement? Legal matters: wills and advance directives? Are they easy to obtain? Who knows about them? Are insurance policies up to date? Where are the copies or information about them? What seems to be working well and what are the needs? Pay particular attention to these factors:
Assessment: Activities of Daily Living (ADLs) • Is the person able to • Take care of daily grooming and hygiene? • Move around with little or no assistance? • Prepare meals? • Able to pay bills? • Able to do housekeeping?
Prepare for Possible Reactions • Your visit will involve a lot of personal questions and possible life style changes • How might he or she respond? • Consider having siblings, friends, other family members, or anyone else who might be involved to be present and participate -Caution: Don’t “gang up” on the older adult. How would YOU feel?
Tips for Making Visits Successful • Check-in with yourself. Bring a positive attitude! • Manage stress: set aside enough time to include pleasure as well as business in your trip, if possible • Realize that you may need more than one visit • Use the time to prioritize needs and start connecting with resources. Some activities will likely be required after returning home • Future visits to implement action plans may be required • Use the resources in this handout to prepare as much as possible before you leave
Assessing Risk • Is there an emergency? • Is health or safety at risk? • Is there any one else who can intervene on your behalf? • Can a temporary plan be developed until you are available to go? • Is there anyone in the area who can provide objective, reliable information about the situation?
The Big Decision: Should I Stay or Should I Go? Should I stay or should I go? or I don’t want the guilt trip, but should I make the road trip? Use your assessment and other tools and information in this training program to help you make this decision easier and make it necessary less often.
Planning and Action • Begin developing action plans right away! • Even if you have not thoroughly assessed the situation, it is not too early to start planning and taking action to meet needs • Action plans should consider your loved one’s preferences, and involve them in doing as much for themselves as possible • Action plans should be flexible, implemented on a trial basis, and changed as needed
It Takes a Community • Engage natural supports, especially within the family itself • Talk to family members • Have a family conference by telephone or in person • Clearly define what the needs are and ask for specific help • Ask siblings for help • What needs most closely match the skills of you and individual family member?s • Who makes decisions in the family? Is that working? • What adjustments need to be made to how caregiver responsibilities are shared? • Communicate, communicate, communicate!
Engaging Your Older Family Member • Ask your family member to be honest about how they feel about receiving help • Talk about the consequences of what will happen if you do not get help now • Explore concerns about how much that the service will cost and what is financial assistance is available • Talk about the facts and explain what happens with the service • Listen to his/her fear. Don’t argue; it is real to them. • Be positive • Offer support Successfully engaging your loved one is the key to making your long distance caring count!
Engaging Your Older Family Member If Resistant • Investigate services and service providers until you have a confident level of trust in them. Your confidence and trust will transfer to your loved ones. • Ensure that he/she understands the service and how it will contribute to independence • Accompany the person to facilities, such as a senior center, to provide support in the beginning, or be present for in-home services • Explain what the service or activity means to you • Ask the person to try it on a trial basis, if possible • Offer the service as a gift if there are financial concerns • Ask a person that he or she respects to talk about it
Social Network -Local, ‘Natural’ Supports • Who will be there when you cannot be? • Look for natural relationships in your loved one's social network • Friends, family members, neighbors, ministers, or other members of your loved one's religious or social affiliations • Identify these persons early, ask for help, and engage them in the planning process • Exchange contact information and communicate regularly • Use these allies as your eyes and ears to get objective view points on your loved one's health and safety • Use them as your arms, hands, legs, and feet and voice for providing support in your absence
Social NetworkSupport for the Family Caregiver For many caregivers, asking for help is the most difficult part of caregiving
Social Network -Other Family Members • Perhaps a sibling or other family member that you believe has a responsibility to help is not doing so • Ask them to help! But, do it tactfully • Stay away from statements that typically begin with “you” and sound like you are accusing someone of doing something wrong • "You are not being responsible!" • "You obviously don't care about me or our parents!” • Use “I” statements that are your own thoughts, opinions, and emotions and communicate them calmly • See next slide for a list of possible “I” statements that may be useful
What to Say to Other Family Members • “I need your help.” • “I cannot manage this alone.” • “I feel overwhelmed.” • “I have a list of things that I need your help with. Which of these can you do?” • “I am concerned that (Mom's)(Dad’s)(?’s) care requires more than I can provide myself.” • “I feel that the responsibility for Mom's care has been left to me and I don't think that's fair to either one of us”
What to Say to Other Family Members • “I do not mean to complain or criticize, and I very much appreciate you listening to me” • “I would like to let you know what I have found out about what (he)(she) needs and what we can do about it.” • “I need you to call (Mom)(Dad)(other family member) at least once a (week)(month) to help me out.” • “When are you able to come see about (????) and do some things around the house?”
Telephone • Use the telephone to maintain contact with: • Parents, siblings and other relatives • Health care providers • Community service providers • Friend, Family, and Faith support providers • Much of the service coordination and problem solving involved in caring from a distance can be done over the phone • Use of the phone frees up time for more pleasure and less business during visits! • Partnerships can be built with service providers through regular phone contact • Partnerships improve the quality of care your loved one receives and prevent or help resolve crisis situations more effectively!
Geriatric Case Manager or Care Manager • Conduct care planning assessments to identify problems, provide solutions • Screen, arrange and monitor in-home help or other services • Review financial, legal, or medical issues and offer referrals to geriatric specialists to avoid future problems while conserving financial resources • Provide crisis intervention • Act as a liaison to families at a distance, overseeing care and quickly alerting families to problems • Assist with moving an older person to or from a retirement complex, assistedcare home, or nursing home • Provide consumer education and advocacy • Offer counseling and support • May provide family or individual therapy, finance management, and conservatorship or guardianship assistance and/or caregiving services
Making Your Caring Count Means Taking Care of Yourself! • Survey Highlights of People Who 'Self-Identify' as Family Caregivers, National Family Caregivers Association, 2000 • 91% believe "preserving your health" is a message that should be told to all family caregivers • 30% exercise regularly since becoming caregivers, compared with 61% who exercised before becoming caregivers • 47% seek prompt medical attention for themselves compared to 70% who did so before becoming caregivers
Taking Care of Yourself! • Learn!- the more you know, the more you get from your efforts, the better you feel about yourself! • Grow!- respect your own limitations and abilities, develop boundaries around them, enjoy successes within them! • Give!- freely, respectfully, and lovingly, without giving yourself away! • Rest!- you're not a super hero, but if you want to be, better get some rest! • Recreate!- physical exertion as well as mindless activities have their place and healing qualities! • Laugh!- research has shown that even the anticipation of laughing positively stimulates body chemistry! • Love!- spend time with people who energize you mentally, emotionally, and spiritually Limit relationships that drain you! • Let go!- of regrets, guilt, and perfectionism
Resources For Caregivers Call 2-1-1 throughout Texas. Provides information and access to health and human service information for all ages Local Aging & Disability Resource Centers (ADRC) ADRC of Tarrant County 1-888-730-2372 1-800-252-9240 to find local Texas Area Agency on Aging 1-800-677-1116 - Elder Care Locator to find help throughout the U.S. Online www.benefitscheckup.org for an online way to determine benefits for which someone qualifies. To find this and other information quickly Go online to: www.familycaregiversonline.net online education, resources, links, FAQs To schedule a caregiver session in your community at your church, business, library, civic group or other location, call your local area agency on aging or send an email from www.familycaregiversonline.net
www.familycaregiversonline.net • Area Agency on Aging
What Assistance is Available through the Area Agency on Aging (AAA)? Information and Referral Caregiver Education and Training Counseling may be available Caregiver Respite Help with finding resources and navigating the system Benefits Counseling Ombudsman Home Delivered Meals Congregate Meals Other services Services for persons age 60 and older Caregiver Services (Services funded by local area agencies on aging and vary by county.)
Written by Zanda Hilger, M. Ed., LPC, Family Caregiver Education, Area Agency on Aging, Revised, 2009 by Zanda Hilger and Betty Purkey. John A Myers, MMFT, LPC, LMFT, JTrain Consulting, wwwJohnAMyerscom Curriculum editing, Power Point Show layout Provided by Romie J Myers, RN, Web Developer, www.familycaregiversonline.org Permission is granted to duplicate any and all parts of this program to use in education programs supporting family members caring for elders. This program is one module of a comprehensive caregiver education program. Go to www.familycaregiversonline.net for more information about this and other training programs internet links frequently asked caregiver questions legal forms phone numbers and more Program Description Administration on Aging website wwwaoadhhsgov/ Long- Distance Care Giving, ARRP website wwwaarporg/
