slide1 l.
Download
Skip this Video
Loading SlideShow in 5 Seconds..
The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups PowerPoint Presentation
Download Presentation
The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups

Loading in 2 Seconds...

play fullscreen
1 / 11

The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups - PowerPoint PPT Presentation


  • 744 Views
  • Uploaded on

ToP Secret. Technical Clearance. The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups. David Wisniewski. Confidential. Classified. Top secret. Grown-up rule #31: Eat your vegetables. official reason: They’re good for you. The truth:

loader
I am the owner, or an agent authorized to act on behalf of the owner, of the copyrighted work described.
capcha
Download Presentation

PowerPoint Slideshow about 'The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups' - aquene


An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation

Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author.While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server.


- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Presentation Transcript
slide1

ToP Secret

Technical Clearance

The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups

David Wisniewski

Confidential

Classified

slide2

Top secret

Grown-up rule #31:

Eat your vegetables.

official reason:

They’re good for you.

The truth:

You don’t eat your vegetables because they are good for you. You eat vegetables to...

slide3

to keep them under control!

Millions of years ago, vegetables ruled the earth. What were they looking for? People! Yes, these were meat-eating vegetables. To prevent vegetables from ever regaining power, grown-ups eat them.

slide4

Besides, which would you rather do:

eat vegetable or be eaten by vegetables?

slide5

Top secret

Grown-up rule #42:

Comb your hair.

official reason:

It keeps it neat.

The truth:

You don’t comb your hair to keep it neat. You comb your hair...

slide6

to stop it from going back into those little holes in your head!!

Hair doesn’t grow out. Hair grows in! Why else would we pull it around with a comb? After all, you only pull things when they want to go the other way.

slide7

Because most girls comb their hair a lot, they don’t have to worry much about Reverse Hair Growth (RHG). Boys do, not only because they don’t comb much, but also because many a flattop or crew cut can grow back into a guy’s head in one night!

slide8

Top secret

Grown-up rule #62:

Don’t jump on your bed.

official reason:

You’ll break it or you might get hurt.

The truth:

Yes, it’s possible to break your bed if you jump on it. And it’s possible you might get hurt if you fall off. But you’ll definitely get hurt...

slide9

If you wake up the mattress!

Mattresses aren’t just big lifeless rectangles crammed with stuffing. They are active wooly creatures raised on farms in Scotland. After growing into adulthood, mattresses start a long period of hibernation. They are rounded up and sold in stores where they end up in your bedroom.

slide11

ToP Secret

Technical Clearance

The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups

was written by David Wisniewski. You can learn more about him by visiting his website at

http://www.carr.lib.md.us/authco/wisn.htm