COUNSELING

1. COUNSELING 17 November 2012

2. What is counseling? Is a process that psychologically empowers individuals to seize back control of their lives, while working through issues and problems that cause them to lose self-esteem, as well as confidence in their own abilities. Counseling increases self awareness and a sense of well-being, and is often the first step individuals take on their path to a more positive life

3. PROCESS ISSUES AND PROBLEMS REGAIN SELF-CONTROL INDIVIDUAL(s) empowerment LOSS OF CONFIDENCE LOSS OF SELF-ESTEEM LOSS OF SELF CONTROL

4. What is counseling? Professional guidance of the individual through psychological methods; collecting case-history data, using various techniques of personal interview, testing interests and interviews Generally orients the individual to towards opportunities to guarantee achievement of goals and aspirations Usually attempts to clarify individual’s own thinking rather than solve his problems

5. What is counseling? THERAPY ANALYSIS TREATMENT ADVISING ADVOCATING DIRECTING ENCOURAGING RECOMMENDING

6. What counseling is NOT Not a filling-in time activity for people perceived to be crazy because of their difficulty to cope with possible extreme emotional situations It is not the magic answer to all of life’s problems; rather a mechanism to help individuals cope with difficult, personal situations It is not an emotional crutch; nor a stand-alone solution. Time and effort still have to exercised by the individual toward creating emotional improvements Counseling is not advising. It is a supportive advice in which the individual (client) is allowed to gain better understanding of self by self-exploration of issues

7. COUNSELING vs. ADVISING

8. COUNSELING vs. COACHING • Coaching is primarily task-oriented; of counseling is person-oriented. • Counseling may include goals for both performance and growth as a person, coaching is basically data-oriented. • Coaching is generally directed to work performance while counseling is both cognitive (thinking) and affective (feeling). Strong involvement of the coach in coaching; involvement of the counselor is oftentimes limited to asking process questions. The session is usually initiated by the coach; in counseling wherein the session may be initiated by the counselor or the counselee.

9. “COUNSELOR” Isaiah 9:6 For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor1, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace. yaw-ats' A primitive root; to advise; reflexively to deliberate or resolve: - advertise, take advice, advise (well), consult, (give take) counsel (-lor), determine, devise, guide, purpose.

10. ROLES OF THE COUNSELOR • PARA-PROFESSIONALS AS PEER SUPPORT • OFFERS CHALLENGING IDEAS • HELPS BUILD CONFIDENCE • OFFERS FRIENDSHIP • LISTENS TO PERSONAL PROBLEMS • STANDS BY THEIR MENTORS IN CRITICAL SITUATIONS • OFFERS WISE CHOICES • TRIGGERS SELF-AWARENESS • INSPIRE THEIR MENTORS • SHARES CRITICAL KNOWLEDGE IF SOLICITED • OFFER ENCOURAGEMENT

11. ETHICS OF COUNSELING • Obligation to extend help • “Ears only”, “Eyes only” of disclosed information • Referrals of cases to other helping professionals COMPETENCY & COMMITMENT CONFIDENTIALITY RESPONSIBILITY CLIENT-COUNSELOR RELATIONSHIP

12. Counseling Hazard OR IS IT “COUNSELOR’S HAZARD? OVERINVOLVEMENT

13. OVERINVOLVEMENT (signs) Too much pre-occupation/concern with the counselee – his/her problems and needs Identifying closely by carrying the problem as if it is the counselor’s own problem Losing sleep wondering about the counselee’s decision or response to problems Going out of the ordinary ways to help the client

14. OVERINVOLVEMENT (dangers) Objectivity is lost; and counselor becomes an ineffective agent Facilitator assumes responsibility and deprives the counselee of learning and growing on his/her own May even pose a danger to the counselor’s well being

15. OVERINVOLVEMENT(How does one handle it?) Self assessment – ego, motives A more detached and objective stand towards the counselee and the problem Always assess your facilitation goals and objectives Encourage counselee to assume his/her roles and responsibilities outside the facilitating sessions Be emphatic but do not lose the “AS IF” attitude Be honest, if you can’t help make a referral

16. 5 ESSENTIALS OF COUNSELING relationship setting techniques adjustments feedback

17. RELATIONSHIP 1 THE HEART OF COUNSELING IS THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THE COUNSELEE AND THE COUNSELOR

18. THE ATMOSPHERE 2 PSYCHOLOGICAL SETTING Acceptance Empathy Respect Positive Regard Permissiveness Genuiness PHYSICAL SETTING Privacy Quiet

19. COUNSELLING TECHNIQUES 3 • LISTEN – ACTIVELY • SUGGEST – DON’T IMPOSE • ENCOURAGE – DON’T PUSH • REINFORCING OR REWARDING • MODELING AND ROLE-PLAYING • OBSERVING & DESCRIBING BEHAVIOR • SUMMARIZE/INTEGRAGE – DO NOT CONCLUDE

20. ACTUAL ADJUSTMENTS 4 • SUPPORT • COACHING (RE-ORIENTATION, NEW SKILLS) • PSYCHOTHERAPY

21. THE FOLLOW-UP 5 DID THE COUNSELING SESSION OR THE TECHNIQUE APPLIED REALLY WORKED? NEED FOR FOLLOW-UP SESSIONS? PERHAPS A NEW SETTING? ANOTHER COUNSELOR? REFERRAL?

22. WHO SAID THAT? THE POWER OF COUNSELING IS IN THE KIND OF RELATIONSHIP EXPERIENCED BY THE CLIENT. THIS KIND OF RELATIONSHIP NATURALLY FLOWS FROM THE PERSONALITY OF THE COUNSELOR. COUNSELING IS NOT A BAG OF TECHNIQUES. COUNSELING IS A HUMAN ENCOUNTER, A HUMAN RELATIONSHIP Adrian Van Kaam SUCCESSFUL COUNSELORS ARE NEVER TECHNICIANS, THEY ARE FUNDAMENTALLY REASONABLE PEOPLE. Rev. Jaime Bulatao THE SUCCESS OF COUNSELING DEPENDS NOT SO MUCH ON THE COUNSELOR’S ORIENTATION OR TECHNIQUE, BUT ON HIS OR HER MATURITY.” Maureen McCarthy

23. THE EFFECTIVE COUNSELOR • Psychological maturity & moral integrity • High level of common sense & good judgment • Genuine interest and being for people • Respect for the worth of an individual and faith in him/her • Sensitivity to thoughts, feelings of people & situations they’re in • Open-minded, tolerant and flexible • Sincerity in attitudes and actions • Friendly, warm, accepting and emphatic • Objectivity in judgment and interpretation • Sense of humor

24. Something to keep in MIND T O R A S TRUSTWORTHY OPEN-MINDED RESPECT FOR THE WORTH OF THE PERSON ACCEPTANCE SENSITIVITY/SINCERITY

25. LISTENING – why can’t WE Not truly concerned with the needs of others Pre-occupied with own problems and concerns Insecure or just too lazy to be bothered Prejudiced/biased Selective listening, we hear only what we want to hear

26. How to be the EFFECTIVE LISTENER Sit closely to the person in an accepting and respectful manner Lean towards the person Nod head occasionally to indicate affirmation Smile at times Look bright and alive Talk in moderation

27. How to be the EFFECTIVE LISTENER PRACTICE “SOLER” S - SIT O - OPEN (eyes and mind) L - LEAN (but not too much) E - EMPATHIZE R - RESPECT

28. EMPATHY and SYMPATHY

29. HELPING BEHAVIORS NON-VERBAL PLEASANT TONE OF VOICE EYE CONTACT OCCASIONAL NODING OF HEAD FACIAL ANIMATION CLOSE PHYSICAL PROXIMITY MODERAT RATE OF SPEECH ACTIVE LISTENING VERBAL • USE SIMPLE WORDS • REFLECT AND CLARIFY • ENCOURAGE • USE VERBAL REINFORCERS • GIVE INFORMATION • SENSE OF HUMOR • NON-JUDGEMENTAL • ACCEPTING • RESPECTFUL • SHARING/CARING

30. DON’T’s • SNEER • FROWN • YAWN • POINT FINGER • SIT FAR APART • JUDGE • ARGUE • CRITICIZE • INTERPRET • CONDEMN • MAKE PUT-DOWN AND RUDE REMARKS

31. CONDUCTING INTERVIEWS AN INTERVIEW IS A CONVERSATION WITH A PURPOSE BE NATURAL, BE YOURSELF MEET THE COUNSELEE AS PLEASANTLY AS POSSIBLE but without too much EMOTION TAKE TIME AT THE BEGINNING OF THE INTERVIEW TO PUT YOUR CLIENT AT EASE BE A GOOD LISTENER. TALK ONLY WHEN NECESSARY END AN INTERVIEW WITH A CONSTRUCTION NOTE

32. INTERVIEW TIPS (1/2)

33. INTERVIEW TIPS (2/2)