by connie saindon mft founder and director since 1998
Skip this Video
Download Presentation
By Connie Saindon, MFT Founder and Director Since-1998

Loading in 2 Seconds...

play fullscreen
1 / 54

By Connie Saindon, MFT Founder and Director Since-1998 - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

  • Uploaded on

By Connie Saindon, MFT Founder and Director Since-1998. Where does one go…?. When the worst has happened? When someone you love has been murdered or died in a violent way? When first responders leave? Who knows and understands?.

I am the owner, or an agent authorized to act on behalf of the owner, of the copyrighted work described.
Download Presentation

PowerPoint Slideshow about 'By Connie Saindon, MFT Founder and Director Since-1998' - Faraday

An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation

Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author.While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - E N D - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Presentation Transcript
by connie saindon mft founder and director since 1998
By Connie Saindon, MFT

Founder and Director


where does one go
Where does one go…?
  • When the worst has happened?
  • When someone you love has been murdered or died in a violent way?
  • When first responders leave?
  • Who knows and understands?
why our program
Why our program….?
  • We are there when others leave…
  • We are the only program in San Diego County, as well as one of the few in the Nation to provide specialized violent services after Violent Death.
  • We are trained in the kind of grief that does not go away

with time.

  • We offer opportunities for Survivors to be with each other.
  • We can provide information on other adjunct providers and agencies.
  • Our approach includes lessons from survivors.
our mission
Our Mission

“Your support is our mission”


“ Provide a Lifeline of Hope and Healing”


Build a community of support



50,000 violent deaths annually


10-12 additional “co-victims”

(doesn’t count DUI, terrorist fatalities and war)

co victims defined
Co-Victims Defined

The term “co-victim” was created due to a lack of recognition for the needs of survivors, and therefore were underserved.

Office of Victims of Crime Bulletin, August 1998

This department provided funds to train other cities in 1998.

You become a member of a club you never wanted to join.

You have paid the highest dues.

You have a lifetime membership.

C. S.

the need in san diego
  • 111 Homicides
  • 370 Suicides (SANDAG)
  • 115 Drunk Driving Fatalities (MADD)
  • Twelve people significantly impacted = 7,152 each year

Statistics provided by: San Diego County Sheriffs Department, 2007, San Diego Community Health Improvement Partners and MADD 2006.

survivor quote
Survivor quote…

“No one understands the magnitude of this. You end up a body with no life in it.”

Co-Victim of Homicide, 1998

multiple levels of complexity
Multiple Levels of Complexity
  • Murder
  • Suicide
  • DUI fatality
  • Shaken baby death
  • Gang killing
  • Terrorist fatality
  • Murder/suicide
  • No body
  • Multiple suspects/trials
  • First arrest-26 years after death
  • No suspect
  • Happened in another state
  • Killer found not guilty
  • More…
multiple players and roles
Multiple Players and Roles
  • Detectives
  • Paramedics/EMT’s
  • Medical Examiners
  • Media
  • Victim Advocates
  • Clean up Services
  • District Attorney
  • Employers/Schools
  • Religious/Spiritual
  • Morticians
  • Cemeteries
  • Security
unnatural death is different
Unnatural Death is Different
  • Violent
  • A Violation- a wrong doing
  • Volitional-on purpose
  • Voyeuristic- private becomes public
Three basic Assumptions may be shattered following trauma:
  • The World is Safe
  • Life has Meaning
  • I have worth

Shattered Assumptions by Ronnie Bulman-Janoff , 1992

impact of loss is incomprehensible
Impact of loss is incomprehensible!

The complexity and competing aspects of each loss can easily overwhelm the family, the community and service professionals who all work to regain a sense of safety,meaning and hope.

additional stressors
Additional Stressors
  • Reconciling how loved one died
  • Threat(s) may continue to exist
  • Media making public what was private
  • Crime Scene Demands
  • Victim Identification
  • Medical Exam requirements
  • Legal imperatives
  • Security
  • Probate
second wounds
Second Wounds….
  • When co-victims are blamed for not preventing what happened
  • When the legal system does not give them a role
  • Courts seem to treat criminals better than victims
  • When family members are treated and considered suspects

The pain of homicide bereavement (and other violent deaths) is described as intense, unprecedented, and inescapable.

The response of the community to survivors is often so inadequate that it has been called ‘‘secondary victimization’’.

Amick-McMullan, Kilpatrick, & Veronen, 1989. 1991; Getzel & Masters,

1984; Redmond, 1989; Rynearson, 1984; Sprang, McNeil, & Wright, 1989; Spungen, 1998

normal reactions
Normal reactions…

Can be:

  • Being possessed with what has happened
  • Compulsive care-giving
  • Compulsive inquiry

SVLP founder and sister “Tiny"

Research is recent in its finding that violent loss bereavement can be even more painful than other losses and often involves symptoms of unremittingdepression and PTSD (posttraumatic stress disorder)(Kaltman & Bonanno, 2003, Zisook, Chentsova-Dutton, & Shuchter, 1998)
Traditional ways of dealing with grief are inadequate and put unrealistic expectations on survivors because they don’t “get over it”. Lack of predictability and controllability are central issues for the development and maintenance of PTSD.
clinical picture may include
Clinical picture may include

PTSD; experiences of intrusive reenactment and avoidance.

Major Depression, DX not given until 2 mo. After loss.

Traumatic Grief/ Complicated Bereavement.

Victimization; rage and a sense of defilement .

Compulsive inquiry; a social and psychological need for investigation and punishment of the murderer.

9 11 study
9/11 Study

Sample size N=2,752

11% - PTSD

37% - mild-moderate PTSD symptoms

51% - evidenced resilient outcomes with 1-0 PTSD symptoms

Problem with the study: relied on phone interviews for diagnosis

(Galea, Ahearn, Resnick et. , al. 2002)

BEGS for further research

veterans with ptsd are more likely to have heart attacks years later
Veterans with PTSD are more likely to have heart attacks years later
  • Medical authorities first accepted PTSD as a psychiatric condition in 1980 at the urging of Vietnam Vets
  • This new study is the first to link PTSD with health problems 10-15 years later

Laura Kubzansky, Harvard, 2007

  • Separation distress occurs as a result of the loss of a loved one as understood by attachment theory
  • Trauma Distress which relates more to how someone died
the challenges
The Challenges
  • Help deal with the loss of your loved one and your longing for reunion.
  • Help you get past revenge and re-enactment imagery that is intrusive.
  • Foster your ability to self-soothe to help contain overwhelming emotions.
  • Navigate the many competing complexities
Survivors Club

Co-victim volunteers who have become Survivors and part of the team to help others

Open to all participants who are members of a club they never wanted to be a member of

Survivors Club

Activities include:

  • Candle Light vigil
  • Holiday Memorial,
  • 5K Walks/Light the Night Against Crime
  • Tree Planting/Crime Victims Oak Garden
  • Potlucks & Picnics
  • Fundraising
candlelight vigil crime victims week
Candlelight Vigil – Crime Victims Week

Victim Assistance Coordinating Council

community of supporth has included
Community of Supporth has included…
  • District Attorney, Bonnie Dumanis
  • Cynthia Charlebois, Director Victim/Assistance
  • Lt. Tom Bennett, SD Co. Sheriff
  • Michelle Del Conte, San Felipe Foundation
  • Joyce Knott, Cara Knott Foundation
  • Jim and Wilma Knott, Crime Victims Oak Garden
  • Victim Assistance Coordinating Council
  • Parents of Murdered Children
Community of Support continued:
  • Paula Myers, MADD
  • Survivors Club Members
  • Anna Knuth, SDPD-Crisis Intervention Team
  • Wendy Maurer, Ph.D, Red Cross, Disaster Mental Health
  • Carmela Caldera
  • Yolanda Boyd
  • Eric & Lisa Hoffacker, www.CarterDesignWorks
  • Elizabeth Munroe, webmaster
people say the darndest things
People say the darndest things…

Do say…

  • My regrets to you…
  • Their loved ones name
  • Just listen
  • Don’t say you know how they feel unless you too have lost someone in a violent way

More on our website under Support

Add yours to our list at [email protected]

The Journey Ten steps to learning to live with Violent Death: Adult Survivors Individual workbook kit & accompanying Calming Exercises CD Order yours [email protected]
upcoming events
Upcoming Events

Current Postings at

  • Website
  • Email [email protected]
  • Or Call 616-685-0005
“Tiny’s” Role

December 8, 1961 at age of 17, my sister, “Tiny”, the third child of eight, was murdered.”

Connie Saindon

Iris is her symbol

Represents HOPE