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Dealing With Anger. What is Anger?. Anger is “an emotional state that that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage.”* Out of control anger can be dangerous. Physiological and biological changes occur. *Charles Spielberger, PhD. What Causes Anger?. External events

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what is anger
What is Anger?
  • Anger is “an emotional state that that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage.”*
  • Out of control anger can be dangerous.
  • Physiological and biological changes occur.

*Charles Spielberger, PhD

what causes anger
What Causes Anger?
  • External events

specific person

an event (traffic)

  • Internal events

worry

brooding

traumatic memories

enraging memories

some people are more angry than others
Some People are More Angry Than Others
  • “hotheaded”
  • chronically irritable
  • sulking
  • physical symptoms
  • low frustration tolerance
why are some more angry
Why are Some More Angry?
  • genetics
  • physiology
  • Socio-cultural factors
  • family background
  • lack of communication skills
four main approaches
Four Main Approaches

1. expressing

2. suppressing

3. calming

4. “tending and

befriending”

1 expressing anger
1. Expressing Anger
  • Anger helps us to fight and defend ourselves when we are attacked.
  • However, when a physical reaction is not appropriate, we need other ways to react.
  • There are limits to socially acceptable expressions of anger.
but is it really good for us to let it all hang out
But, is it Really Good for us to “Let it All Hang Out?”
  • myth of getting it out
  • actually can escalate anger
  • overlooks “triggers”
  • can be aggressive
2 suppressing
2. Suppressing
  • Anger can be suppressed, then converted or redirected.
  • Often suppressed anger comes out in unexpected (and unwanted) ways.
the unexpressed anger can create problems
The Unexpressed Anger Can Create Problems
  • passive-aggressive behavior
  • critical behavior that sabotages relationships
  • physical problems:

high blood pressure

hypertension

depression

3 calming
3. Calming
  • reduce emotional feelings
  • reduce physiological arousal
  • learn to control your reactions
  • try to replace anger-provoking thoughts with rational thoughts
4 tending and befriending women s unique anger management technique
4. Tending and Befriending: Women’s Unique Anger Management Technique
  • Women often react to anger by going into a “tend and befriend” mode.
  • Relationships help women overcome their negative feelings.
using anger strategies
Using Anger Strategies
  • You can’t get rid of the people or things that enrage you, but you can learn to control your reactions.
  • If you find yourself acting in ways that seem out of control and frightening, you might need some help to find better ways to deal with this emotion.