TAKS ESSAY

1. TAKS ESSAY Discussion & Retest Information

2. Areas Done Well • Some good choices for topics • Most of you write clearly, correctly & smoothly enough to score well

3. Areas that Need Work • PLEASE write a story • If you write about a specific event that is connected to the topic, you will get at least a 2 • Plus it’s easier to get a 3 or higher with a specific story

4. Areas that Need Work • Hypothetical discussions aren’t as effective as REAL examples (What if…) • Generalities hurt you (“Friends,” “people”…NAME specific people, places and events. Test – if you don’t have capitalized names, you’ve been WAY too general!) • Avoid “you” – it gets preachy (“Have you ever thought…” or “You should…”) No sermons please

5. Areas that Need Work • Conclusion – explain the change in feelings from before and after the event • Organize into paragraphs • Dialogue format • Keep verb tense consistent – usually past tense (story has already happened) • Run-ons are a problem for a lot of you

6. Areas that Need Work • Edit for mechanical problems • there, their & they’re (lots of errors) • to vs. too • past vs. passed

7. Grade for 1st Writing 4 = 98 ___________________________ 3 = 85 ___________________________ 2 = 75 ___________________________ 1 = 65 Grade for Retest N/A ______________________ 3 to a 4 = 95 3 to a 3 = 89 ______________________ 2 to a 4 = 95 2 to a 3 = 85 2 to a 2 = 79 ______________________ 1 to a 4 = 95 1 to a 3 = 85 1 to a 2 = 75 1 to a 1 = 69 Retest InformationNot available for 4s, Optional for 3s, Required for 2s & 1s Grade will not go down even if you score lower on rewrite

8. “It’s dark in that awful way that allows you to make out objects but not the black spaces behind them. My breathing comes ragged from exertion and fear. The only person I trust in the world lies on the floor beside me. I lean into him and hear that he’s still breathing but it’s shallow and hard won. He’s hurt, I know. But I can’t see how badly. I whisper his name in his ear but he doesn’t respond. I feel his body but there’s no blood that I can tell. The sound of his body hitting the floor minutes before was the worst thing I’ve ever heard”. Lisa Unger – Beautiful Lies Action Lead

9. “Doodle was born when I was seven and was, from the start a disappointment. He seemed all head, with a tiny body that was read and shriveled like an old man’s. Everybody thought he was going to die. Daddy had the carpenter build a little coffin, and when he was three months old, Mama and Daddy named him William Armstrong. Such a name sounds good only on a tombstone. When he crawled on the rug, he crawled backward, as if he were in reverse and couldn't change gears. This made him look like a doodlebug, so I began calling him 'Doodle.' Renaming my brother was probably the kindest thing I ever did for him, because nobody expects much from someone called Doodle”. James Hurst – “The Scarlet Ibis” Character Lead

10. "Never shall I forget that night, the first night in camp, which has turned my life into one long night, seven times cursed and seven times sealed. Never shall I forget that smoke. Never shall I forget the little faces of the children, whose bodies I saw turned into wreaths of smoke beneath a silent blue sky. Never shall I forget those flames which consumed my faith forever. Never shall I forget that nocturnal silence which deprived me, for all eternity, of the desire to live. Never shall I forget those moments which murdered my God and my soul and turned my dreams to dust. Never shall I forget these things, even if I am condemned to live as long as God Himself. Never." Elie Wiesel - Night Reaction Lead

11. “Now the sunlight had lifted clear of the open space and withdrawn from the sky. Darkness poured out, submerging the ways between the trees till they were dim and strange as the bottom of the sea. The candle-buds opened their wide white flowers glimmering under the light that pricked down from the first stars. Their scent spilled out into the air and took possession of the island”. William Golding – The Lord of the Flies Setting Lead

12. Dialogue Lead “ANDY, YOU’RE NOT GOING to believe this.” This is the type of sentence that, when said in a vacuum, doesn’t reveal much. Whatever it is that I am not going to believe might be very positive or very negative, and there would be no way to know until I see it. Unfortunately, this particular sentence is not said in a vacuum; it’s said in the Passaic County Animal Shelter. Which means that “positive” is no longer one of the possibilities. David Rosenfelt – Play Dead

13. Dialogue format

14. Depth Charging • 1. Find a telling sentence – it just makes a statement. • 2. Write the sentence on another sheet of paper. • 3. Circle an interesting word (avoid articles and • prepositions) in the sentence • 4. Write a sentence, on topic, about the circled word. • 5. Repeat steps 3 & 4. • 6. Write one more sentence that connects back to the • first sentence. • 7. Do it 3-4 times per paper.

15. “The Voice of the Spurs” My heart was beating wildly as I rode up the rickety old elevator. When I reached the second floor, the door opened to reveal a most peculiar sight. Instead of a state-of-the-art radio facility, the place was gutted and full of construction workers. Taken aback by the surprising surroundings, I walked up to the secretary and told her that I was scheduled to meet with Jay Howard for a job interview. She replied that he was not in yet and to take a seat.

16. Conclusions • Callback – when something at the onset is referenced at the end – ties the piece w/a bow • Dialogue – character says something meaningful, a lesson, that contributes to the essay • Contemplative – thinking, reflective, tells the reader what insights/lessons learned • Quotation – not given by character but outside source.