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Overcoming Bitterness

Kids’ dispute makes obit of mom, Josie Anello of Land O’Lakes, famous on internet… (Andrew Meacham, Tampa Bay Times, 2/22/12) LAND O'LAKES — Her sweetly smiling face appeared Feb. 14 in the obituaries of a local newspaper.

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Overcoming Bitterness

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  1. Kids’ dispute makes obit of mom, Josie Anello of Land O’Lakes, famous on internet… (Andrew Meacham, Tampa Bay Times, 2/22/12) LAND O'LAKES — Her sweetly smiling face appeared Feb. 14 in the obituaries of a local newspaper. In most ways, the accompanying obituary for Josie Anello, who died Feb. 11 at 93, was worded like many other death notices. She had been supportive and compassionate, she had lived for friends and family and would be missed. Then there is the stunner in the third line:

  2. Kids’ dispute makes obit of mom, Josie Anello of Land O’Lakes, famous on internet… (Andrew Meacham, Tampa Bay Times, 2/22/12) LAND O'LAKES — Her sweetly smiling face appeared Feb. 14 in the obituaries of a local newspaper. In most ways, the accompanying obituary for Josie Anello, who died Feb. 11 at 93, was worded like many other death notices. She had been supportive and compassionate, she had lived for friends and family and would be missed. Then there is the stunner in the third line: The condemning language reveals a long-standing rift between "A.J." Anello, who wrote and placed the obituary, and his two siblings — particularly his sister. So what happened here? As with many a family quarrel, it comes down to money. Basically, Angelo Anello, 63, and his sister, Ninfa Simpson, 65, accuse each other of stealing from their mother.

  3. Overcoming Bitterness • Bitterness defined. • “Bitter hatred” (Strong) - “Bitter frame of mind” (Vincent) • “a state of sharp, intense resentment or hate—‘bitter resentment, spite, bitterness.’ (Louw/Nida) • “The height of settled anger, opposite to kindness” (Wesley’s Notes) • “Subtle hostility that poisons the whole man” (unknown source) • “It is the spite that harbors resentment and keeps a score of wrongs” (Expositors Bible Commentary” • “that fretted and irritable state of mind that keeps a man in perpetual animosity, that inclines him to harsh and uncharitable opinions of men and things, that makes him sour, crabby, repulsive in his general demeanor, that brings a scowl over his face and infuses the words of his tongue with venom.” (Ephesians 4 Commentary Online)

  4. Overcoming Bitterness • Christians are not immune to bitterness. • “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.” (Eph 4:31) • “Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.” (Col 3:19) • “looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled.” (Heb 12:15) • “if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth.” (Jas 3:14)

  5. Overcoming Bitterness • The life of Joseph is a great challenge if we struggle with bitterness. • Joseph’s brothers hated Joseph and wanted to kill him but instead sold him into slavery (Gen. 37:18-28). • In Egypt, Joseph was imprisoned for refusing the advancements of Potiphar’s wife (Gen. 39) • His opportunity for early release is lost because of the butler’s forgetfulness (Gen. 40). • Eventually, Joseph is raised to a position of great authority and prosperity for interpreting Pharaoh’s dreams (Gen. 41). • Because of a famine, the brothers who sold Joseph into slavery and brought so much hardship into his life are dependant upon him for life (Gen. 42-44)

  6. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s wounds. • Bitterness causes us to lose our perspective – we think we are justified in our bitterness because others have hurt us so deeply. • How do our wounds compare to Josephs’? His brothers wanted to kill him, they sold him into slavery, and their actions brought great suffering and hardship into his life.

  7. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s wounds. • Bitterness causes us to lose our perspective – we think we are justified in our bitterness because others have hurt us so deeply • How do our wounds compare to Josephs’? His brothers wanted to kill him, they sold him into slavery, and their actions brought great suffering and hardship into his life. • How do we respond when others have hurt us deeply? Mt. 18:21-35

  8. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s initiative. • Joseph was clearly the offended party but he is the one who desires reconciliation (Gen. 45:4-5).

  9. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s initiative. • Joseph was clearly the offended party but he is the one who desires reconciliation (Gen. 45:4-5). • Too many times, we wait with an attitude that says “until they come to me and seek my forgiveness, there will be no reconciliation”.

  10. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s initiative. • Joseph was clearly the offended party but he is the one who desires reconciliation (Gen. 45:4-5). • Too many times, we wait with an attitude that says “until they come to me and seek my forgiveness, there will be no reconciliation”. • When this is our attitude, bitterness and sin are winning the battle over righteousness (Mt. 5:23-26; Mt. 18:15)

  11. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s kindness. • Joseph was proactive in his love toward his offenders (Gen. 45:9-11).

  12. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s kindness. • Joseph was proactive in his love toward his offenders (Gen. 45:9-11). • It is impossible to be proactive in love and bitter at the same time (1 Cor. 13:4-8; James 3:14)

  13. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s kindness. • Joseph was proactive in his love toward his offenders (Gen. 45:9-11). • It is impossible to be proactive in love and bitter at the same time (1 Cor. 13:4-8; James 3:13-18)

  14. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s kindness. • Joseph was proactive in his love toward his offenders (Gen. 45:9-11). • It is impossible to be proactive in love and bitter at the same time (1 Cor. 13:4-8; James 3:13-18)

  15. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s perspective. • Joseph focused on God’s providence and the good God intended to accomplish rather than the pain (Gen. 45:5; 50:15-21)

  16. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s perspective. • Joseph focused on God’s providence and the good God intended to accomplish rather than the pain (Gen. 45:5; 50:15-21) • A recognition of God’s providence and the good that can be accomplished will help us be more forgiving and put away bitterness (Rom. 5:3-4).

  17. Overcoming Bitterness • We are challenged by Joseph’s perspective. • Joseph focused on God’s providence and the good God intended to accomplish rather than the pain (Gen. 45:5; 50:15-21) • A recognition of God’s providence and the good that can be accomplished will help us be more forgiving and put away bitterness (Rom. 5:3-4).

  18. Overcoming Bitterness • How do you measure up the challenges of Joseph concerning overcoming bitterness? • What about our wounds? Are we as willing to reconcile and forgive as Joseph even though others may have hurt us deeply? • What about our initiative? Are we as quick as Joseph to seek peace and reconciliation when we are sinned against? • What about our attitude? Are we proactive in loving actions or do we desire to hold on to our bitterness? • What is our perspective? Joseph focused on God’s providence and the good God intended to accomplish rather than the pain.

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