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Impact of Low Self-Esteem in Families of Individuals with Disabilities Presented by: James J. Messina, Ph.D Insecurity Closed to Others Poor Decision Maker Anxious Fear of Intimacy Not able to have fun Black and White Thinker Poor Anger Control High Need for Approval Lots of Guilt

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impact of low self esteem in families of individuals with disabilities

Impact of Low Self-Esteem in Families of Individuals with Disabilities

Presented by:

James J. Messina, Ph.D

what is low self esteem
Insecurity

Closed to Others

Poor Decision Maker

Anxious

Fear of Intimacy

Not able to have fun

Black and White Thinker

Poor Anger Control

High Need for Approval

Lots of Guilt

Lots of Depression

What is Low Self-Esteem?
what contributes to low self esteem
What Contributes to Low Self-Esteem
  • Dysfunctional Environments
  • Bad relationships
  • Codependent
  • Has Disability or Relative with Disability
  • Non -supportive school, work
  • Abused
  • Conditional acceptance and love
what causes dysfunction
What causes Dysfunction?
  • Things more important than people
  • Mental illness
  • Major Losses
  • Abuse
  • Rigid feelings
  • Ice Boxes
  • Addiction
  • Disability
  • Big Pay Off
looking good
Looking -Good
  • Hero
  • High Achiever
  • Over-responsible
  • Driven
  • Approval Seeker
  • Looks together
  • Goal: Denial of Problems
acting out
Acting Out
  • Scapegoat
  • Irresponsible
  • Trouble-Maker
  • Rebellious
  • Poor - Under Achiever
  • Anti-authority
  • Self-destructive
  • Caustic
  • Goal: Divert focus
pulling in
Pulling In
  • Invisible
  • Loner
  • Bookish
  • Quiet - Recluse
  • Hard to know
  • Aloof
  • Avoid problems
  • Protect self -overweight
  • Goal: withdraws to survive
entertainer
ENTERTAINER
  • Clown
  • Mascot
  • Comic Relief
  • Immature
  • Hyperactive
  • Not taken seriously
  • Distracter
  • Attention getting
  • Talks a lot
  • Goal: Divert attention
troubled person
Troubled Person
  • Irresponsible
  • Addict
  • Unstable
  • Blame others
  • Out of control
  • Broken
  • Con artist
  • Denial of problems
  • Problem for others
  • Goal: Self-serving
enabling
Enabling
  • Protect & Save others
  • Over-responsible
  • Co-dependent
  • Nagger
  • Covers up
  • Controlling
  • Demanding
  • Goal: get troubled people to change
rescuing
Rescuing
  • Helper
  • Motivated
  • Victimized
  • Stuck
  • Irrational Loyalty
  • Burdened-down
  • Self-Negated
  • Unassertive
  • Goal: reduce tension, hurt & pain
people pleasing
People Pleasing
  • Easily liked
  • Placator
  • Always smiling
  • Outgoing
  • Friendly
  • Courteous
  • Generous
  • Fits in
  • Works hard to please
  • Goal: get approval
non feeling
Non-Feeling
  • Stoic
  • Nothing bothers
  • Intense thinker
  • Low-Key
  • Steady even-tempered
  • No strong feelings
  • Black & White
  • Goal: deny feelings to survive
resistance issues of 9 traits
Resistance Issues of 9 Traits
  • Looking Good-denial of problems- “I am just fine the way I am”
  • Acting Out-rebel authority of therapist- “You are not the boss of me”
  • Pulling In-hide from therapist-”I really don’t want to talk about it.”
  • Entertainer-distract & deflect-”Let me tell you about a funny thing I heard this week.”
  • Troubled Person-anger at being in therapy-”None of this is my fault, it is there problem”
resistance issues of 9 traits16
Resistance Issues of 9 Traits
  • Enabler-self-pitying-”My life is in ruins, if only he would change my life would be better”
  • People Pleaser-overly compliant-”I will agree with you to your face but do what I want”
  • Rescuer-focus on others-”Too many people depend on me the way I am-I can’t change.”
  • Non-feeling-empty of emotions-”I am lost when you ask me how I feel about …”
defense mechanisms of 9 traits
Defense Mechanisms of 9 Traits
  • Looking Good-Reaction Formation, Denial, Sublimation
  • Acting Out-Displacement, Rationalization, Denial
  • Pulling In-Repression, Displacement, Denial
  • Entertainer-Regression, Repression, Denial
  • Troubled Person-Projection, Rationalization, Denial
defense mechanisms of 9 traits18
Defense Mechanisms of 9 Traits
  • Enabler-Sublimation, Projection, Rationalization,Denial
  • People Pleaser- Reaction Formation, Denial
  • Rescuer-Sublimation, Reaction Formation, Denial
  • Non-feeling-Repression, Denial
what is healthy self esteem
Sense of Productivity

Sense of Autonomy

Sense of Uniqueness

Altruistic

Leadership Ability

Sense of Competence

Self-Confidence

Healthy Self-Concept

Independent Thinker

Self-Accepting & Loving

Good Decision Maker

What is Healthy Self-Esteem?
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