Effective Discipline Strategies

1. Effective Discipline Strategies By Sonya Fultz M. Ed. Wilmington College

2. RATIONALE for POSITIVE DISCIPLINARY APPROACHES The Critical Element—The Teacher I have come to a frightening conclusion: I am the decisive element in the classroom. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher I possess tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous…I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated, and a child humanized or dehumanized. Dr. Hiam Ginott, Child Psychologist 2

3. What do you want for your children? • Responsibility • Communication skills • Problem solving skills • Empathy • Kindness • Time management skills • Honesty • Curiosity • Acceptance • Pride • Care for others • Creativity • Happiness • Helpful • Flexibility • Humor • Risk taker • Driven • Knowledge seeker • Organization

4. Punishment versus Discipline PUNISHMENT • Immediate response • Stops a behavior • Demeaning, humiliating, physically painful • About adult control, power and authority • No long-term, positive effect DISCIPLINE • Immediate or no response • Stops or ignores the behavior • Respects the importance of the relationship with the child • Teaches or reinforces skills that have a long-term, positive effect CRETE Project

5. Management Styles High Firmness Demandingness Dominance Authoritarian Authoritative (Positive Discipline) High Low Kindness Responsiveness Cooperativeness Permissive Low

6. Tools for Positive Discipline • Focus on Preventive Strategies • Understanding Direct and Indirect Strategies • Encourage Cooperation through Talk • Understanding Beliefs behind Behaviors • Managing Effective Classroom Meetings • Understanding Desperation Cycle • Using De-Escalation Strategies

7. Discipline Strategies Indirect Strategies • Developmentally appropriate practices • Organized classroom • Routines and schedules • Learning objectives • Clear expectations and limits • Room design • Individual space • Designated areas for different types of learning Direct Strategies • “On the spot” guidance • Listen actively • Change proximity • Give cues for appropriate behavior • State limits effectively • Redirect behaviors • Change something about setting • Practice newly constructed behavior • Help children preserve dignity • Teach problem solving • Recognize signs of stress, anxiety, or strong emotion

8. Soft Limits language “This is your final warning.” • – how many were already given? “You need to pick up your puzzle now OK?” • – OK with whom? What happens if it’s not OK with the child? “I can't start class until it’s quiet” • – stating the facts, not giving clear instructions. “Just this once.” • – Child will remember that exception and want it again. “Don’t take too long.” • – How long is that? “I don’t care for your attitude.” • -- What change is being requested? “I’ve had enough from you.” • -- What is the consequence?

9. Firm Limits Language Focus on the behavior – Explain what you need them to do or stop doing. Be direct and specific – Explain clearly what you want them to do, how to do it and when to start. Use a normal tone of voice – Yelling sends the wrong message, shows you have lost control. Specify consequences if necessary – If you believe student will test limits, specify the consequences for noncompliance. Support your words with actions – Follow through!

10. Logical Consequences • A discipline technique that focuses on the consequences of misbehavior • Emphasizes internal control rather than external control • Three criteria for consequences • Related • Respectful • Reasonable • Most logical consequences will fall into three categories • Making reparations “You Break it - You fix it” • Mishandling responsibility “More Limits Need to be Set” • Positive Time Out

11. Praise vs. encouragement “A child needs encouragement like a plant needs water.” Rudolf Dreikurs

12. Cooperation through Talk • Use “What and How” questions to get student talking • What happened? • What can we do about the problem? • How do you think that made others feel? • What else could you have tried? • How can I help you? *As adults we must practice listening and helping students lead themselves toward solutions to solve problems.

13. Understanding Beliefs behind behaviors

14. Managing Effective Classroom Meetings • Several Functions • Connection • Planning • Goal-Setting • Problem-Solving • Assessing/Evaluating • Meeting Schedule • Compliments and Appreciations • Revisit solved problem • Address new agenda item • Future planning

15. Building Blocks of Effective Meetings Form a circle Practice compliments and appreciations Create an agenda Develop communication skills Learn about separate realities Recognize needs based motivation Practice role playing Focus on non-punitive solutions

16. Understanding the Desperation Cycle Child Unable to Communicate Child Feels More and More Desperate 1 2 Acting Out 3 Child Feels Shame, Anger, Guilt Adult’s Emotional Responses Secondary Gains 4 Adult’s Punitive or Reinforcing Reactions

17. Desperation Cycle Child is unable to communicate and becomes more desperate Child acts out feelings through behavior instead of words Child feels shame, anger or guilt, leading to more desperation Adult gets emotional and may react in counterproductive ways Implementing punishment increases guilt or resentment, increasing child’s desperation CRETE Project

18. Breaking the Desperation Cycle 1. Make it private! Remove other people. 2. Distract them (music, food, drink) 3. Help child communicate feelings – ask 4. Use active listening skills to LISTEN silence is your friend 5. Respect child’s need for space 6. Maintain calm demeanor CRETE Project

19. Helpful Phrases to Teach the Explosive Child These phrases will help the “explosive child” signal you that he or she is losing control and needs some time and space. Help them learn these. “Gimme a minute” “I can’t talk about that right now” “I need help” “I don’t feel right” “This isn’t going the way I thought it would” “I don’t know what to do” “Something’s wrong with this”