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PROBLEMS!

PROBLEMS!. 跑题。偏题 . 2007.03.04 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The ability to cooperate well with others is more important today than in the past . Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer . 拆分 Businessmen, scientists, movie-makers.

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PROBLEMS!

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  1. PROBLEMS!

  2. 跑题。偏题

  3. 2007.03.04 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The ability to cooperate well with others is more important today than in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  4. 拆分 Businessmen, scientists, movie-makers.

  5. 学生在首段提到对国家的责任, 提及不相关的概念. • 后面又提到因为过去没有电脑和机器,所以要和别人合作.(因为是提纲,所以没有具体解释。) • 另外又说因为要有良好的人际交往,所以必须与别人合作. 而人际交往在过去和现在都一样重要。

  6. 2007.04.29 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is desirable to know about events from all over the world even if it is unlikely to have any effect on your daily life. Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

  7. 不一定完全没有影响 • 可以扩大眼界 • 可以娱乐,减压

  8. 段落偏题,最后一段的主题句是:这些事情不会对我们产生影响,所以我们应该了解它们。――完全不make sense…段落偏题,最后一段的主题句是:这些事情不会对我们产生影响,所以我们应该了解它们。――完全不make sense…

  9. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people hold the opinion that in twenty years, the printed books will disappear and just be replaced by the technological inventions like computer.

  10. 段落偏题:Second, compared with other electronic productions, paper is much more independent and almost everybody can afford it.(第二段的主题句不切题 )

  11. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Scientists should be responsible for the negative impacts from the scientific discoveries.

  12. 段落偏题: • First, everyone needs encouragement include the scientists. • 另一篇也是段落偏题: • In addition, nation and government have made a serious of laws and taken actions to limit the negative effect. (本体讲的是科学家是否应该对负面影响负责,而不是如何减少负面影响。)

  13. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Though the advantages that owning a business are numerous, we should not ignore that working for others has some advantages.

  14. 跑题:把给别人打工理解成为别人服务(认为这是高尚的值得提倡的)――囧。。。跑题:把给别人打工理解成为别人服务(认为这是高尚的值得提倡的)――囧。。。

  15. 2007.03.10 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important for a teacher to help students gain self-confidence rather than teaching specific knowledge. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  16. 跑题原因:偷换概念――把帮学生获得自信理解成对学生好跑题原因:偷换概念――把帮学生获得自信理解成对学生好 • 把关注于学科理解成对学生冷淡

  17. 另外一篇文章: • First, everybody will grow up and come into (become) an adult. • Second, nobody on the earth is perfect. • Third, the(去掉) teachers only teaching (teach) students the knowledge which can only increase people’s reliance on teachers. • 三个主题句完全和文章不相干。

  18. 段落问题

  19. 主题句没有放到开头

  20. Several years ago, money is(was) still a forbidden zone for children. Admittedly, as a tradition last several centuries, it must have plenty of reasons. When I was young, my parents warned me not to touch money anytime. They thought money is too attractive and I was too young to control myself. As a result, I knew anything about the money until I was 10 years old. Though kids and even teenagers are less controlled, that won’t be a matter if parents or teachers teach them in the collect way. Instead, developing a good habit of spending money in a young age will affect all his life. In other words, as long as a child can spend money regularly, he can prevent any other temptations.(这句才是你这个段落真正的主题句,为什么不放到开头呢?)

  21. 主题句太抽象或者太具体

  22. 具体 • Third, I want to recommend the Sherlock and Me, a Film about detection, which is fascinating and enhance the capacity of people‘s rational thought. Take a Film clips for example, detective Holmes found the prisoner to remain at the scene of the word in the wall…  Detective films can enhance the capacity of people’s rationality.

  23. 抽象 Several years ago, money is(was) still a forbidden zone for children. Admittedly, as a tradition last several centuries, it must have plenty of reasons.

  24. 主题句指代不明 This, that, it, them, such…

  25. Agree or Disagree? Government should support scientific research without any practical use. Ex. First, it is an immense waste of money to keep up such a research in science(such a 指的是哪个?应改成impractical scientific researches).

  26. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Students who keep their rooms neat and organized are more likely to be successful than students who do not. I am not in favor of this opinion. First because I can see no connections(link/relationship/association/attachment/bond/relevance) between them . them是什么要具体写出来。

  27. 段落缺乏细节

  28. First of all, parenting influence people’s eating habits a lot. When people are young, most of them must spend a lot of time to live with their parents. So whatever things, they also watch and think their parent’s behaviors or must do something what is their parents think is right. Then, they remember and let that became themselves habits naturally no matter that habits are good or bad. Therefore, eating habits is depending parenting(can be affected by the parents).

  29. “论证和题目结合不紧密,不是论据无关,而是作者没有表现这种合理的关系在哪里。”这种错误不是一个连接词的问题,而是一句话或者一句解释的问题。“论证和题目结合不紧密,不是论据无关,而是作者没有表现这种合理的关系在哪里。”这种错误不是一个连接词的问题,而是一句话或者一句解释的问题。

  30. 个人案例: • 本人之前写过一篇托福作文题:Television advertizing directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Use specific reasons and details to explain it.

  31. The first reason that children should not be exposed to TV advertizing is that little kids with crystal innocence might be attainted(topic sentence). Being covered with vivid and entertaining motions, the primary aim of TV advertisements is to sell its products. Children who haven’t entered the complicate world are not supposed to be effected by the profits-oriented world of adults.

  32. 可以看到我的中心句是:小孩子们不应该接触一些电视广告,因为未然他们纯洁的心灵。紧接着我就说广告的初始目的就是为了买东西,没有涉世的小孩子们不应该为成人的只追求利益的世界所影响。这样我的论据就和段落topic sentence有些脱节,如果有下划线的句子改成下面的句子就会好一些:

  33. Television advertisement presents children a profit-oriented world,because the primary purpose of commercials is to use all means to sell its products. Exaggerating and faking propagandas on television may perform as a hidden education for children, and thus exert harmful effects on them. • 这样一来我就解释了为什么小孩子看电视广告心灵会被玷污的一个原因。

  34. Writer’s anxiety • 每个人都可能遇到的情况,有一些解决方法很好。 • 先放松一下自己。 • 和别人讨论题目。 • 因此建议考生可以和同考的战友一起讨论题目,可以开阔思路。

  35. Writes’ block

  36. 当学生在练习时完全对某一个题目没有思路了,或者写作的过程中突然卡壳了,有如下建议:当学生在练习时完全对某一个题目没有思路了,或者写作的过程中突然卡壳了,有如下建议: • 伸懒腰,深呼吸,做一些小的运动。 • 我的方法是躺倒床上继续想题目,而不是对着白白的WORD文档 发呆。 • 另外就是咨询老师,同学,课本等等。

  37. 另外还有一种方法就是 “TRUST YOUR GUSH!”(导师Tom Romano 在他的书Crafting Authentic Voice中提到 )--- 就是想到什么就写什么。我觉得这个方法对英语为第二外语的中国学生来说,试图不通过翻译直接用英文表达自己的想法,是个很好的练习! 因为在练习时不管你的文章 “However poorly worded”, 却是最接近你最初的想法的(你可以事后做修改)。

  38. Materials

  39. People who are willing to dabble in new areas have a larger chance to succeed. OR Parents are closest to their children and always have faith in them. / and they can encourage their children to succeed.

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