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God Loves You. “Marriage isn’t fifty-fifty. It is more like 75-75, 100-100, or probably 110-110.”. Elnora dePetris.
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“Marriage isn’t fifty-fifty. It is more like 75-75, 100-100, or probably 110-110.” Elnora dePetris
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth: I Corinthians 13:4-8a (KJV)
but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. I Corinthians 13:8b-13 (KJV)
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. I Corinthians 13:4-8a (NIV)
But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:8b-13 (NIV)
Read chapter 9 before Wednesday. Be ready to discuss in class the rest of the week. Discussion points! Chapter 9: Caring Enough to Communicate
What advantages/risks is there to you knowing your own personality profile? What of your partner? (particularly in the area of communication—our focus) • What are the various “realms” of communication between people? • What are some practical suggestions for communication (think love language/MI) between people? • Why might it be important to seek to understand someone before trying to communicate with them? • What are other communication issues in relationships?
WOMEN: MEN:
Men and women just think/see things differently. Humor helps!
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Journaling Research “relationship ratios” (start with the 4 articles i provide) and provide a summary/reflection of the information. EXAMPLE: what is the basic info. What implications for relationships (note that this includes business, casual, etc) can be learned. What habits might you need to begin practicing? What communication patterns do you already do? Other insights . . .
Relationships start with seeking to understand, which must begin with really listening which has to assume a basis of care which can only happen with trust in the other person’s intentions for good
Unity is just that: UnITogether?: Yes!
Problems get solved when everyone acknowledges and uses their gifts for the benefit of all
Journaling Using the material in your textbook as a guide, what rules for communication were either followed or broken in the clips we saw? What patterns of communication have you seen modelled in your own home? What might you plan to differently in your future home? Write a reaction/process/summary of the communication patterns needed for temperaments, MBJT, 5LL and others.
“Because that’s what intimacy is: it’s a willingness to be vulnerable, a willingness to bite my tongue and a willingness to set an example of what I believe in.” Diane Lane
What are the questions Dr. Brown suggests are the 2 most dangerous questions? a)Who is at fault? b)What should i fear? c)What will i do with my life? What is a mentality of “scarcity” culture? a)Never EXTRAORDINARY enough b)Never HAPPY enough c)Never GOOD enough What are the “normal” ways we cope with scarcity? a)Armor up b)Drugs & alcohol c)Surrender (to a higher power)
Empathy . . . a)Fuels connection b)Is feeling for someone c)Is feeling with someone Sympathy . . . a)Is where you connect with someone b)Drives dis-connection c)Is feeling for someone Dr. Brown’s definition of blame? a)Holding someone accountable for what has happened b)Discharging of discomfort and pain (anger) c)Gives the ILLUSION of control
What one response is NOT a helpful response a)“at least . . .” b)“wow, that must be . . .” c)“———” (nothing) Describe her distinction of empathy vs sympathy in the “well” example How might these insights be integrated with what you know about personalities/temperaments/gender roles?
Group yourselves: Question 1: • If you could, would you rather live in a boat or a tree house? Question 2: • What are the best ways for parents to show their children they love them? Question 3: • What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever done? Question 4: • What personality trait has gotten you in the most trouble?
