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PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH

PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH. Today’s Training Goal. To assist families in understanding and managing physically aggressive behaviors in children and youth. Assumptions.

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PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH

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  1. PARENTING PHYSICALLY AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN AND YOUTH

  2. Today’s Training Goal To assist families in understanding and managing physically aggressive behaviors in children and youth.

  3. Assumptions • This curriculum assumes that you are working with children who have the cognitive skills to engage in problem solving interactions with adults.

  4. Body’s Stress Hormone Response Diagram source: http://www.human illnesses.com/Behavioral-Health-Sel-Vi/Stress.html

  5. Appropriate Expressions of Anger • Relaxation Techniques • Problem Solving • Letter to nowhere • Journal • Physical activity

  6. Escalation Antecedents/Triggers Anxious  Defensive  Aggressive  Dangerous

  7. Anxiety: What does it FEEL like? • Heart is pumping • Tingling • Worried • Maybe shortness of breath • Helpless • Scared

  8. Anxiety: What does it LOOK like? • Sweating • Fidgeting • Twitching • Pacing • Unable to sit still, focus, concentrate

  9. Anxiety: What does it SOUND like? • Chattering • Perseveration • Quiet

  10. Responding to Anxiety Behavior Be supportive and non-judgmental Be positive and reassuring Use reflective listening Ask open-ended questions Problem Solve • Could the child listen to music on his/her headphones while at the dentist? • Could the child go to an appointment with you to observe what it is like?

  11. Feels Like… Stuck on idea or problem Can’t move on Still present: Heart Pumping Shortness of breath Tingling Worried Problem is unsolvable Looks Like… Protective of space but quick to crowd others Doesn’t seem to listen Can’t sit still Still Present: Sweating Pacing Twitching Fidgeting Defensive Behavior

  12. Sounds Like… Rapid Speech Loud Still Present: Perseveration Staying on same subject Response Techniques: Turn down the heat Defensiveness can escalate into aggressive behavior Get through the sensory shutdown Maintain a comfortable distance Describe the current behavior and how it differs from baseline behavior. Ask open-ended questions Defensive Behavior (continued)

  13. Aggressive Behavior

  14. Aggressive Behavior (continued)

  15. Danger Behavior

  16. Danger Behavior (continued)

  17. Dr. Haim Ginott: “I’ve come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. My personal approach creates the climate. My daily mood makes the weather. As a teacher I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that dictates whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized.”

  18. How Meaning is Conveyed • 7% is in words that are spoken. • 38% of meaning is in the WAY words are spoken. • 55% of the meaning is in facial expression.

  19. Triggers • Sensory • Situational • Transitions • Interpersonal • Time of day

  20. Categories of Reinforcements • Social • Consumable • Activity • Manipulative • Exchangeable

  21. Logical Consequences • Teach, don’t punish • Related • Reasonable • Respectful

  22. CHILDREN DO WELL IF THEY CAN!

  23. Why Children Explode Many children are not able to comply with expectations because of developmental delays. They lack the skills they need to be successful.

  24. 5 Steps to Problem Solving • Define the Problem • Brainstorm Alternatives • Choose a Solution • Obtain a Commitment • Evaluate the Results

  25. WHAT IS A GOOD SOLUTION? Any solution that two parties agree is realistic, doable, and mutually satisfactory.

  26. CRISIS PREVENTION PLANNING • Takes place early in a case • Considers child’s past and experiences • Includes input from the child, caseworker, and others involved in child’s care

  27. AN EFFECTIVE CRISIS PLAN: • Is user-friendly • Has clear directions • Is individualized • Is preventative • Plans for real-life situations • Is developed collaboratively • Changes as the child/youth changes

  28. RESOURCES - YOU ARE NOT ALONE! • Child’s Social Worker, therapist, doctor, psychiatrist, and other caregivers • DSHS emergency contact numbers • Crisis Line phone numbers • Other community resources • 911

  29. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF • Have a plan for self-care • If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of your children

  30. Self-Care • Stay in touch with supportive friends • Exercise • Use support groups • Keep a sense of humor • Forgive yourself

  31. “I have become clear about at least one thing: self-care is never a selfish act - it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give it the care it requires, we do so not only for ourselves but for the many others whose lives we touch.” Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak

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