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Revision Strategies. How can we make our writing stronger and more polished?. What are we aiming for here?. We want language that is: Clean Clear Direct The language used should be appropriate to the narrator— you!. Common Mistake #1. Redundant words or phrases

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revision strategies

Revision Strategies

How can we make our writing stronger and more polished?

what are we aiming for here
What are we aiming for here?

We want language that is:

  • Clean
  • Clear
  • Direct

The language used should be appropriate to the narrator—you!

common mistake 1
Common Mistake #1

Redundant words or phrases

  • “He” (five times in three sentences)
  • “With his own two eyes”
  • “Sneaky and suspicious”
common mistake 2
Common Mistake #2

Unnecessary words, especially adverbs

  • “He tiptoed quietly”
  • “He couldn’t really believe it”
  • “He thought wonderingly”
common mistake 3
Common Mistake #3

Passive, ineffective verbs

  • “He thought maybe he was actually crazy.”
  • “It looked like a body . . . ”
  • “Seemed to be acting . . . ”
  • “Maybe his eyes were playing tricks on him.”
revision strategies1
Revision Strategies
  • Replace redundant words and phrases
  • Underline and scrutinize adverbs
  • Delete unnecessary words, altering sentences as required
  • Read aloud and listen for awkwardness
  • Put verbs to work
how did i do this
How did I do this?

Kelly waited in the smelly station for the local, which as usual took forever to arrive. She stepped into the closest car and sat down. At 3 a.m. the train was empty. Probably she’d get off at 34th Street and look at the Christmas decorations at Macy’s. Her mother would never find her there. Kelly had left a goodbye note in the middle of the dining room table; in it she said she was visiting a friend in Van Cortland Park.