Elder Care: Taking Care of Yourself while Caring for Your Elders

1. Elder Care: Taking Care of Yourself while Caring for Your Elders

2. Overview: • Being pulled in so many directions • Key aspects of senior life issues • Planning ahead with your parents: communication, communication, communication • Making realistic assessment of the care needs • Elder Care – a family & community affair • Take care of each other

3. Pulled in so many directions • Sandwich generation • Between ages of 35 and 60 • Needs of your own children • Needs of your parents • Own financial future and financial needs of parents

4. Pulled in so many directions • Working • Raising your own children • Caring for an older adult • Can cause you to feel: • Exhausted • Overloaded • Guilty • Worrying that you have neglected someone

5. Key Aspects of Senior Life Issues-Medicare • Covers medical expenses for individuals over age 65 • Part A: hospital insurance and skilled nursing • Part B: basic medical services-md office visits • Part D: Prescription • Where to obtain information.

6. Key Aspects of Senior Life Issues - Medicare • Many care needs not covered • Prescription drugs • Routine physicals • Eye glasses • Hearing aids • Most dental services • Routine foot care

7. Key Aspects of Senior Life Issues - Medigap • To fill the difference left by Medicare • Purchase Medigap policies • Private insurance • Two forms • One fills the gaps in Medicare benefits • One assigns coverage for medical care through an HMO or other managed care plans

8. Key Aspects of Senior Life Issues - Prescriptions: • Explore medigap plans for prescription coverage • Use mail order for chronic medications • Talk with MD about alternative medications or generics • Shop around to different pharmacies • Explore low income programs through the pharmaceutical companies

9. Key Aspects of Senior Life issues - Living environments • Independent Living • Continuing Care Retirement Communities • Assisted Living Centers • Board and Care Homes • Skilled Nursing Homes • Dementia/Alzheimer Units

10. Key aspects of Senior Life Issues - Living environments • Identify the options available in your area • Review these options • Select a few facilities for a site visit • Do your homework • Making a decision • Consult with the EAP for assistance in this process

11. Key aspects of Senior Life issues - Health Care Directives • Durable power of attorney • Allows you to appoint someone to see that doctors give you the type of care you want • Advanced directives • When you are unable to direct your own medical care, this document allows the person appointed to direct your medical care

12. Key Aspects of Senior Life Issues – Long-Term Care Insurance • Insurance that provides for long-term care in a skilled nursing facilities, assisted living or home care. • Cheaper when purchased earlier

13. Planning Ahead with Your Parents – communication, communication, communication! • Start planning before a crisis occurs • Never an easy conversation • Need to overcome your natural fear about “meddling in their affairs”.

14. Planning Ahead with Your Parents – communication, communication, communication • Conversation with your parents about the following topics: • Medical care • Financial affairs • Housing plans • And other arrangements

15. Planning Ahead with Your Parents – communication, communication, communication • Be sensitive, genuine, but direct • Be supportive and not judgmental • Ask open ended questions • Be prepared to accept and respect your parents’ decisions and points of view • Do not overwhelm them with lots of probing questions

16. Realistic Assessment of Care Needs • Number of issues need to be clarified • Do your parents want to remain in their home as long as possible? • Do they have long-term care insurance? • In the event of a crisis, is there a family member available who can provide care for several months? • How do you and your parents feel about their moving into your home?

17. Realistic Assessment of Care Needs • Do your parents live in a remote area or are there services available in the area? • Do your parents have an updated will? • How do they want to have health decisions made? • Have they signed a health care directive?

18. Elder Care – a family and community affair • Care most often provided by women in the family • Try to find ways to share care giving tasks • Spouse assists with children or the aging parent • Other relatives who can assist • Explore FMLA as an option • Explore community resources that can be helpful

19. Elder Care – a family and community affair • Adult Protective Services (APS) • IHSS • Senior Centers • Meals on Wheels • Visiting Nurses Association • EAP

20. Take care of each other • Emotional experiences of care giving • Role reversal • Sense of loss & gain • Pressure to provide all care needs • Guilt about making decisions on placement

21. Take care of each other • Emotional experiences of care receiving • Roles Reversal • Sense of loss and gain • Fear of total dependency • Anxiety about placement

22. Take care of Each Other • Nurture your relationship • Not the time to fix old wounds • Time to share memories • Focus on the positives of the moment • Realistic expectations

23. Take care of each other • Create opportunities for your parents to care for you while you care for them

24. Resources • IBHcorp.com: WorkLife • Aarp.org/families/caregiving • Mayoclinic.com/print • Ssa.gov: Social security Administration • Local resources: County Department of Social Services, Office on Aging, Senior Centers… • EAP services