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WORKING OUT CONFLICTS IN RELATIONSHIPS (WITHIN THE BCBP)

WORKING OUT CONFLICTS IN RELATIONSHIPS (WITHIN THE BCBP). Conflict is a normal and necessary part of healthy relationships. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything at all times.

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WORKING OUT CONFLICTS IN RELATIONSHIPS (WITHIN THE BCBP)

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  1. WORKING OUT CONFLICTS INRELATIONSHIPS(WITHIN THE BCBP)

  2. Conflict is a normal and necessary part of healthy relationships. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything at all times. • When conflict is mismanaged, it can harm the relationship. But when handled in a respectful and positive way, conflict provides an opportunity for growth, ultimately strengthening the bond between two people. • Conflict arises from differences. It occurs whenever people disagree over their values, motivations, perceptions, ideas, or desires.

  3. INTRODUCTION In community (BCBP), you have a diversity of attitudes, opinions, traits and backgrounds. People with different attitudes can cause conflicts and misunderstandings, leading to difficulties in relationships.

  4. Guidelines on Conflict Resolution • Make an effort to preserve the unity which has the • Spirit as its origin and peace as its binding force. Eph4:1-3 “ I plead with you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received, with perfect humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another lovingly. Make every effort to preserve the unity which has the Spirit as its origin and peace as its binding force Eph 4:25-27 “See to it, then, that you put an end to lying; let everyone speak the truth to his neighbor, for we are members of one another. If you are angry, let it be without sin. The sun must not go down on your wrath; do not give the devil a chance to work on you”.

  5. Guidelines on Conflict Resolution • Put away any hostility, quarreling and bad temper. Eph 4:25-27 “See to it, then, that you put an end to lying; let everyone speak the truth to his neighbor, for we are members of one another. If you are angry, let it be without sin. The sun must not go down on your wrath; do not give the devil a chance to work on you” Eph 4:31 “Get rid of all bitterness, all passion and anger, harsh words, slander, and malice of every kind”.

  6. Guidelines on Conflict Resolution • Go and make peace with your brother or sister; • avoid bringing in others, but go directly and try to • resolve it among yourselves Mt 18:15,16 “If your brother should commit some wrong against you, go and point out his fault , but keep it between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. • If reconciliation is needed, take the initiative to • patch things up Mt 5:23,24 “If you bring your gift to the altar and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift at the altar, go first to be reconciled with your brother and then come offer your gift “.

  7. HOW TO WORK OUT DIFFICULTIES • Whoever is at fault should immediately apologize. • Whoever is in the right should accept the other’s apology and discuss the reason that brought about this issue to avoid similar misunderstandings in the future. If the issue is a matter of right or wrong, we needed the wisdom of the Spirit to discernwho is right or wrong. If you find difficulty with this, suggest you bring in your leader.

  8. HOW TO WORK OUT DIFFICULTIES • If the issue is not a matter of who is right or wrong, • but rather which is better or how it can be improved, speak directly to the one concerned. • If he proves his point, agree to the change and thank him for it. • If it is not clear-cut matter and you don’t agree, bring it up to a leader. However, if this can be avoided by all means try to come to terms between the two of you. It is a lot easier to accept responsibility and apologize if a third party is not around.

  9. HOW TO WORK OUT DIFFICULTIES • Give up wanting things your way. • A way by which one practices humility. • Becoming sensitive to how good brothers and sisters do things. • If the issue is just a matter of preference, trivial • matters, mannerisms, then be a brother or sister by acceding to his way.

  10. HOW TO WORK OUT DIFFICULTIES D. Personal Conflicts • Conflicts and disagreements may simply be over-sensitiveness. • Mannerisms that rub you the wrong way. • Pettiness that can easily be overlooked. • One way to overlook these trivial things is by going over the person’s assets and qualities. When you realize his overall good qualities, you will find easy to overlook the petty little things he or she does.

  11. LOVE FOR EACH OTHER • If there is love and patience among brothers , things will always work out. (Rom 8:28) • Those whom the Lord has called he predestined to share in his love (Rom 8:29) • Pray for each other.

  12. HOW TO WORK OUT CONFLICTS(Fairly and Peacefully) 1.    STOP . . . before you lose control of your temper and make the conflict worse. 2.   SAY . . . what you feel is the problem. What is causing the disagreement? What do you want? 3.   LISTEN . . . to the other person's ideas and feelings. 4.   THINK . . . of solutions that will satisfy both of you. If you still can't agree, ask someone else to help you work it out.

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