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This chapter explores the complex dynamics of gender relations in Kisii society, focusing on the impact of socio-economic changes on male and female identities. It delves into the themes of social value, colonialism, circumcision, marriage, children, gender roles, and identity. The text highlights the challenges faced by men as traditional roles shift, leading to male marginalization and increased interdependence between the genders. Gender antagonism, economic pressures, and changing social norms are examined, shedding light on the struggles and complexities within Kisii gender relations.
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“Women Forget that Men are the Masters” Chapter 8: Gender Antagonism, Social Value and Identities
Introduction • Main objective: To understand why the gender relations between men and women in Kisii society is fraught with antagonism and aggression • Underlying theme: Socio-economic changes have been harder on men than women; female identity and self-esteem have been strengthened while male identity and self-esteem has been weakened • Hypothesis: Social values linked to male identity have become more complex and contradictory than the social values linked to female identity
Social Value • Is fundamental to identity • Is fundamental to self esteem • Is fundamental to gender relations • It is the part of society that most affects cultural notions of gender and sexuality
Colonialism, Socio-economic Change and Men • Profound impact on social roles and identity • Men separated from the home as migrant laborers; this marginalizes them from the household • Emergence of new social role: male as absent breadwinner • Men end up fulfilling a role that has no place in the traditional Kisii value system
Colonialism, Socio-economic Change and Women • Male absence from household, women become primary managers • New social role not in contradiction to traditional values • Traditional notion of women as ‘entrepreneurial and strong’ gets strengthened • Female identity and self-esteem strengthened
Construction of Gender Roles/Identities • Circumcision • Marriage • Children
Circumcision • Female initiation/circumcision emphasizes control of female and male sexuality • Initiation ceremonies contradictory for women • Male initiation/circumcision—men given more social roles and responsibilities
Marriage • Cohabitation favored over marriage • No bridewealth transferred • Severe effects: more for women because marriage critical to social standing • Women more actively involved in manipulating ways to stabilize their positions
Children • Men want them—they have little else left to increase their status • Women must shoulder costs of having many children • Some women taking control of their fertility • Threatens male control
Men under Threat • Interdependence increased between sexes • Men do not identify new breadwinner roles • Internalizing their marginalization Spending money on outside activities (girlfriends and booze) • Women less likely to be respectful and submissive their husbands • Women victimized by their husbands behavior
Gender Antagonism • ‘We marry those we fight’/‘We fight those we marry • Antagonism both is and is not inherent feature to Kisii gender relations • Economic pressure • Changing social roles • New norms and values given differential priority by men and women
Identity • New occupations/roles imposed by colonial order found no place in traditional value systems • Role-based identity reinforced in women • Existential identity reinforced in men • Male control of female sexuality/fertility increasingly linked to male existential identities in times of stress
Fluidity of Social Roles/Values • Social functions mediate between existential and role-based identities • Integration of previously circumstantial roles— businessman or matatu driver—into Kisii culture
Rape and violence • High incidence (been so since 1940s) • Related to circumcision ritual when girls teased boys • Notion of high intensity and need for sex by men • Women not supposed to talk positively about sex
