Raise your handIf you’re a bully… The Simpsons™ and related characters are registered trademarks of Fox Studios and are used without permission in this presentation. NASRO and ASROA are not for profit organizations and receive no financial benefit from material contained in this presentation.
CLASS GOALS: WHAT are some effective strategies? WHEN does joking become bullying? WHO is affected?
WHO is affected? • The BULLY • The TARGET • The BYSTANDER(S)
BYSTANDERS Out of the three, who has the most power…
OnlyJOKING… Or BULLYING? • INTENTIONTO CAUSE DISTRESS • FREQUENCYOF THE ACT • IMBALANCEOF POWER
INTENTION DO YOU FIND PLEASURE IN TAUNTING AND CAUSING DISTRESS… DOES THE TARGET EXPERIENCE A DIFFERENT FEELING THAN YOU?
FREQUENCY HOW OFTEN IS THE TARGET ATTACKED… WHEN DOES THE TARGET FEEL IT IS TOO MUCH?
POWER IMBALANCE DOES THE BULLY HAVE AN UNFAIR ADVANTAGE… DOES THE TARGET HAVE AN UNFAIR DIS-ADVANTAGE?
Four KINDS of BULLYING: • PHYSICAL • VERBAL • RELATIONAL • CYBER
TRIPPING PHYSICAL PUSHING THROWING OBJECTS CROWDING HITTING STARING UNWANTED TOUCHING SPITTING BODY LANGUAGE
L.E.P.LAW ENFORCEMENT PERSPECTIVE • DID YOU KNOW according to Texas Law • Assault is defined as: • Causing bodily injury to another (Class A misdemeanor) • Threatens another with imminent bodily injury (Class C misdemeanor) • Physical contact with another if contact is regarded as offensive of provocative (Class C misdemeanor)
TAUNTING VERBAL THREATS NAME CALLING RACIST COMMENTS SEXIST COMMENTS DISRESPECTFUL COMMENTS CRUEL JOKES
RELATIONAL CLIQUES EXCLUSION HARASSMENT LAUGHING AND POINTING RUMORS GOSSIP ROLLING EYES BLOGGING CYBER HARASSMENT
CYBER THREATS EXCLUSION MEAN TRUTHFULNESS RUMORS TEXT MESSAGING GOSSIP INSTANT MESSAGING BLOGGING CYBER HARASSMENT
L.E.P.LAW ENFORCEMENT PERSPECTIVE • DID YOU KNOW according to PC 42.07 • Harassment is defined as: • With intent to harass, annoy, alarm, abuse, torment, or embarrass another a person initiates communication by telephone, in writing or electronic communication • This includes obscenities, threats, calling and hanging up, falsely reporting that someone else has suffered an injury or death.
pushing, hitting, intimidating by towering over, facial, gestures, spitting, crowding… walk away, pretend it's not happening, laugh, join in, encourage, stand next to target, get help… withdrawn, submissive, cut, cowering, bruise, bleeding, retaliate… laughing, tone of voice, put downs,threats, taunting, cruel jokes… applaud, whisper, encourage, say "stop," defend target, listen… quiet, crying, tone of voices, nervous laughter, yell back… embarrassed, insecure, humiliation, fear, shame, stop going to school, exclusion… fearful, insecure, disgusted, excited, ashamed,caught in the middle, supportive… angry, excited, laughing, cruel, exclusion, rolling eyes, gossip… rumors, gossip,mean truth, prank calls, blogging, threats, IM, texts.. continues the gossip, laughs, ignores, says "stop”, chooses not to IM... surprised, shocked, confused, physical illness, betrayed, avoidance…
THINGS TO DO: • Do NOT cheer for the fight… • Do NOT ignore the situation… • DO tell an adult… • DO say something to the bully… • DO challenge the bully’s motives… • THINGS TO SAY: • Come on, this isn’t worth the trouble… • There’s a better way to handle this… • You’re better than this. Be nice… • Being a bully isn’t cool… • Leave him/her alone… • Stop. That’s Rude… • That’s not Funny… BYSTANDERSTRATEGIES
BULLYSTRATEGIES • THINGS TO DO: • Know your motives… • Use your popularity to build up weak targets… • Use your strength to help weak targets… • Use your humor to befriend weak targets… • THINGS TO THINK ABOUT: • Is my intention to cause distress? • How often do I tease this person? • Do I have an unfair advantage? • Is the person I’m attacking an unfair target? • How does the target feel?
PROTECTION: • Avoid the DANGER ZONES… • Stay with friends or groups… • Walk away from the fight… • Don’t give up… • Practice what to say… • Don’t over react… • Stay calm… • Don’t show your tears… • Tell a trusted adult… • PREVENTION: • Fake it ‘til you make it… • Make eye contact… • Be friendly… • Take a joke– laugh at yourself… • Have good posture… • Use a firm voice… SURVIVORSTRATEGIES
MORE SURVIVORSTRATEGIES • REMEMBER: • ACT confident • Stay calm… • Don’t show your tears… • Laugh along… • Change the subject… • PREPARATION: • Practice what to say… • “It’s okay. Say whatever you want – it doesn’t bother me.” • “Who are you again?” • “Whatever. Anything else?” • “You’re repeating yourself.” • “She noticed my ears (pick feature) are big (pick adjective)… Great eyesight.” • Help the bully with his observations…
SURVIVORSECRETS • BULLY SURVIVORS UNDERSTAND THE FOLLOWING: • Bullying happens almost everywhere and to almost everyone at some point in their lives… • Bullies like audiences… • Bystanders usually do not agree with the bully, but they may not know what to do… • Survivors concentrate on what THEY can do to improve, not what the bully should do… • Being a bully does not make a person more successful in life… often it makes them less successful… • Stay with others… there is safety in numbers… • Try out of school activities like club sports, etc…
L.E.P.LAW ENFORCEMENT PERSPECTIVE WHAT IS SELF DEFENSE AND WHEN IS IT ALLOWED? • Target did NOT provoke the fight… • No possible escape routes (you’re cornered)… • Imminent fear of injury to self or innocent others… • Only MINIMUM force required to stop bully is allowed…