State of the Child Conference Dare County, NC March 31, 2006

1. State of the Child Conference Dare County, NCMarch 31, 2006 Embracing Our Differences Committee

2. Tolerance Destruction of Stereotypes Celebration of Diversity Greater Sense of Inclusion and Community Higher Social CapitalConnections among individuals – social networks and the norms of reciprocity and trustworthiness that arise from them.

3. Tolerance:The First (but not the only) Step “Human diversity makes tolerance more than a virtue; it makes it a requirement for survival.” – Rene Dubos “Laws alone cannot secure freedom of expression; in order that every man present his views without penalty there must be spirit of tolerance in the entire population.” – Albert Einstein “The highest result of education is tolerance.” – Helen Keller “Collective fear stimulates herd instinct, and tends to produce ferocity toward those who are not regarded as members of the herd.”– Bertrand Russell “The capacity for getting along with our neighbor depends to a large extent on the capacity for getting along with ourselves. The self-respecting individual will try to be as tolerant of his neighbor's shortcomings as he is of his own.” – Eric Hoffer “Ultimately, America's answer to the intolerant man is diversity, the very diversity which our heritage of religious freedom has inspired.”-- Robert F. Kennedy

4. Tolerance is Inspiring!

5. Without tolerance, we operate on stereotypes and stereotypes are built upon assumptions and generalizations “Those who constantly generalize learn less and less about more and more until they know nothing about everything.“--American Proverb

6. Stereotypes 1. Stereotyping often results from, and leads to, prejudice and bigotry. 2. Unchecked prejudice and bigotry leads to discrimination, violence, and, in extreme cases, genocide. 3. Prejudice can be spread by the use of propaganda and inflamed by demagogues. 4. Language, particularly slang, is often used to dehumanize members of certain groups of people, and this dehumanization is a precursor of discrimination, isolation, and violence.

7. A "stereotype" is a generalization about a person or group of people. We develop stereotypes when we are unable or unwilling to obtain all of the information we would need to make fair judgments about people or situations. In the absence of the "total picture," stereotypes in many cases allow us to "fill in the blanks." Our society often innocently creates and perpetuates stereotypes, but these stereotypes often lead to unfair discrimination and persecution when the stereotype is unfavorable.

8. High School Stereotypes & Cliques Hermits Hip Hoppers Hippies In-Crowd Indies Jocks Metalheads Nerds/Geeks Otaku Preps Rainbow Club Ravers Rednecks Rejects Revolutionaries Spooky Kids Skaters Stoners Stud Gov Theater Kids A.P.s Bandos Bohemians Cheerleaders Chess Clubbers Crombies Debaters Druggies Duds Emos Gamers Gangstas Goths

9. What are the stereotypes in our own secondary schools? Do our students at Dare County Secondary Schools have healthy or unhealthy rivalries?

10. A Short Film You will see six people playing basketball – three are wearing black shirts and three are wearing white shirts. Each player can do one of three things: 1. Dribble 2. Pass the ball 3. Bounce-Pass the ball CAREFULLY COUNT THE NUMBER OF TIMES THAT PLAYERS IN WHITE SHIRTS BOUNCE-PASS THE BALL TO OTHER PLAYERS IN WHITE SHIRTS.

11. Quite often in life, we see what we expect to see or what we are told to look for. Thus, when we hold a stereotype, we fail to see the common humanity of others who are, in fact, more like us than unlike us. All human beings share 99.9% common DNA

12. There are two very predictable outcomes that result from stereotyping and a failure of tolerance for diversity: • Bullying which often leads to youth violence, isolation, and depression. • Drug abuse as an attempt to self-medicate emotional problems.

13. School Violence May Result from Bullying San Diego, CA (2002) Charles “Andy” Williams said he liked some of the people he shot. At Santana HS, the then-undersized boy says he was called "bitch" and "faggot" and was made fun of because he did not fight back when bullied. Williams said he told a dozen fellow students about his plan to bring a gun to school and "then, like, everybody's egging me on, egging me on." He said he figured someone would tell, but they didn't and eventually he wondered what he "had to lose." Charles Andrew Williams fired his .22-caliber revolver at least 30 times, wounding 13 and killing two at his Santee, Calif., high school, he dropped his gun and waited for the police, who approached the 15-year-old freshman with understandable caution. "It's just me," he murmured to an officer. Bullying in its various forms is prevalent in schools around the globe. Children learn, practice, and experience bullying beginning at a very young age. Research indicates that this form of aggression is a growing problem affecting student learning, social interactions, and school climate. It has been implicated as a contributor to school violence.

14. U.S. School Shootings Since 1996

15. Substance Abuse is a Problem in Dare County A countywide survey of 7th through 12th graders (conducted in 2000) found that 29% had used marijuana once or more in the previous 12 months. That number put Dare County above the state average of 21.7% and slightly below the national average of 34%. The Board of Education passed a random drug testing policy for students in grades 7-12 who participate in extracurricular activities or purchase parking permits. Adults say that the drug testing is going well. Students say that many have switched to drugs other than pot (such as cocaine, mushrooms, and prescription drugs) because these substances clear out of the body faster and aren’t as easily detected ina random drug test. Source: Lamb, Joey “Above Average,” Nighthawk News, March 1, 2006.

16. How many times, if any, have you had alcohol to drink in your lifetime? Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

17. Reports attending one or more parties in the last year “where other kids your age were drinking” Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

18. Percentage of Students Using Illicit Drugs Three or More Times in Last Year Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

19. There are new data (2006) about drug use/abuse in Dare County that are being released at this State of the Child Conference.

20. Bullying depends upon exclusion and seeing others as being different in negative ways. • Bullying is widespread.

21. Bullying Statistics • 66% of kids say they have witnessed bullying. • 30% of kids say that they have been victims of a bully. • 1 out of 5 kids admits to being a bully. • 8% of students miss one day of class per month for fear of bullies. • 43% fear harassment in the bathrooms at their school • 282,000 students are physically attacked in secondary schools each month. • Every 7 minutes a child is bullied on a playground: Adult intervention = 4%, Peer Intervention = 11%, No Intervention = 85%.

22. Imagine that someone at your school hit you or pushed you for no reason. What would you do? 1 = I’d hit or push them right back. 2 = I’d try to hurt them worse than they hurt me. 3 = I’d try to talk to this person and work out our differences. 4 = I’d talk to a teacher or other adult. (Average = 8%) 5 = I’d just ignore it and do nothing. Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

23. Sadly, bullying is widespread. According to a 2004 KidsHealth KidsPoll, 86% of more than 1,200 9 to 13 year-old boys and girls polled said they've seen someone else being bullied, 48% said they've been bullied, and 42% admitted to bullying other kids at least once in a while. Where do you draw the line between good-natured ribbing and bullying?

24. Although teasing may resemble bullying because it can prompt feelings of anger or embarrassment, teasing is less hostile and done with humor, rather than harm. It is a natural part of growing up and beginning to affiliate with one’s peers. It does not shun, exclude, or isolate. Teasing often promotes an exchange between people rather than a one-sided dose of intimidation.

25. Sticks and Stones Can Hurt for a Lifetime According to a report titled "Hostile Hallways" issued by the American Association of University Women, 76% of students have experienced non-physical harassment and 58% have experienced the physical variety. This treatment can even push students to suicide in extreme cases. On the reverse side, in a study in Scandinavia, 60% of those classified as bullies went on to collect at least one criminal conviction. Bullying, once thought of as a problem specific to boys, is also widespread among girls. In fact, a recent study showed that 44% of those students who reported threats and violence were girls.

26. Girls are more likely to experience verbal abuse such as being teased about their appearance (64 percent of the girls versus 58 percent of boys) and have false rumors spread about them (72 percent of girls versus 60 percent of boys).

27. Boys were more often targets of physical aggression such as being beaten up (11 percent of boys versus 6 percent of girls) and having property destroyed (46 percent of boys versus 31 percent of girls).

28. Types of Bullying Emotional bullying can be more subtle and can involve isolating or excluding a child from activities (i.e., shunning the victim in the lunchroom or on school outings) or spreading rumors. This kind of bullying is especially common among girls. Physical bullying can accompany verbal bullying and involves things like kicking, hitting, biting, pinching, hair pulling, or threats of physical harm. Racist/Cultural bullying preys on children through racial slurs, offensive gestures, or making jokes about a child's race or cultural traditions. Sexual bullying involves unwanted physical contact or sexually abusive or inappropriate comments. Verbal bullying usually involves name-calling, incessant mocking, and laughing at a child's expense.

29. Cyber Bullying Arelatively new phenomenon - began surfacing as modern communication technologies advanced. Through email, instant messaging, Internet chat rooms, and electronic gadgets like camera cell phones, cyber bullies forward and spread hurtful images and/or messages. Bullies use this technology to harass victims at all hours, in wide circles, at warp speed. For example, Myspace.com initially was the home to 20-somethings interested in indie music in Los Angeles. Today, you will be hard pressed to find an American teenager who does not know about the site, regardless of whether or not they participate. Over 50 million accounts have been created and the majority of participants are what would be labeled youth - ages 14-24. MySpace has more page views per day than any site on the web except Yahoo! (yes, more than Google or MSN).

30. Victims of Bullies Victims of bullying typically are children who suffer from fear, anxiety, and low self-esteem as a result of being bullyied. They may try to avoid school, and social interactions, in an effort to escape the bullying. Some victims of bullying are so distressed that they commit, or attempt to commit suicide. Even when bullying does not drive victims to the extremes of suicide, victims experience significant psychological harm which interferes with their social and academic and emotional development. The sooner the bullying is stopped, the better for the long-term outcome for victims. If bullying patterns are allowed to continue unchecked, there are long-term consequences for the victim. As adults, victims of bullies are more likely to be depressed, and have lower self-esteem than their non-bullied cohorts.

31. Percent of Youth Reporting Risk-Taking Behaviors:Has attempted suicide one or more times Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006 Note National Statistic: Every 78 seconds a teen attempts suicide - every 90 seconds they succeed. (National Center for Health Statistics)

32. Bullies Bullying is often a warning sign that children and teens are heading for trouble and are at risk for serious violence. Teens (particularly boys) who bully are more likely to engage in other antisocial/delinquent behavior (e.g., vandalism, shoplifting, truancy, and drug use) into adulthood. They are four times more likely than nonbullies to be convicted of crimes by age 24, with 60% of bullies having at least one criminal conviction.

33. Threatened Physical Harm to Someone Once or More in the Last 12 Months Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

34. Hit someone once or more in the last 12 months Physically hurt someone once or more in the last 12 months Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

35. Witnesses to Bullying Behavior In one study of junior high and highschool students, over 88% said they had witnessed bullying in their schools. Teens who witness bullying can feel guiltyor helpless for not standing up to a bully on behalf of a classmate or friend, or for not reporting the incident to someone who could help. They may experience even greater guilt if they are drawn into bullying by pressure from their peers. Some teens deal with these feelings of guilt by blaming the victim and deciding that he or she deserved the abuse. Teens sometimes also feel compelled to end a friendship or avoid being seen with the bullied teen to avoid losing status or being targeted themselves.

36. MIAMI HERALD Secretive new video game might inspire school bullies By MATTHEW I. PINZUR, Mar. 13, 2006A secretive new video game about school bullies could be targeted by Miami-Dade School Board members, who fear the repercussions of a game that is set in a school and includes fights, slingshots and possibly much more.Little is actually known about the game, Bully, which was scheduled for release last fall but has been repeatedly delayed. Opponents of violent video games have been driven largely by its pedigree -- the game is being developed by Rockstar, the controversial designer of the ultra-violent Grand Theft Auto series.In those games, which have been top sellers for years, players steal cars, hire prostitutes and brutally beat and murder enemies, police and bystanders. Opponents fear that Bully will bring the same graphic violence into the virtual schoolhouse. ''This game is built entirely around bullies and is staged in a school -- it's the antithesis of everything we're trying to promote,'' said School Board member Frank Bolaños, who introduced a resolution urging Rockstar not to release Bully, asking local merchants not to sell it and asking parents not to buy it.

37. Center for the Prevention of School Violence1801 Mail Service CenterRaleigh, NC 27699-1801800-299-6054919-733-3388 ext 332

38. Bullying and Exclusion Prevents Some Children From Satisfying a Fundamental Human Need: The Need To Belong

39. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:Belonging is a Fundamental Human Need

40. Become a Lake

41. An Antidote to Bullying and a Guide to the Future of a Vibrant, Safe, and Compassionate Community: A Celebration of Diversity and Differences

42. Celebrating Our Differences

43. Diversity is a term used broadly to refer to many demographic variables, including but not limited to race, ethnicity, religion, culture, language, gender, color, national origin, disability, sexual orientation, age, education, socio-economic status, cognitive abilities, geographic origin, physical stature, weight, and skill characteristics.

44. The increases in minority populations between the 1990 and 2000 census data in NC is astounding. The minority population in NC grew by 823,488 people between 1990 and 2000. If the trend continues, NC and Dare County will both continue to become rich in racial diversity.

45. The minority population in Dare County grew by 760 people between 1990 and 2000, with the Hispanic population more than tripling over that time span.

46. Appreciating and Celebrating Diversity Prepares us for the Future of America The U.S. Census Bureau predicts that by the middle of the next century, race in America will be turned upside down. In 2050 Caucasian will be a minority, and present-day minorities will be in the majority. One group of Americans already exemplifies that future. The Millennium Generation, today's 15-to-25-year-olds, is the most racially mixed generation this country has ever seen. Its members are 60% more likely to be non-Caucasian than those of their parents' and grandparents' generations, and an increasing number are racially mixed. A third are African-American, Latino, Asian, or Native American. And the two-thirds who are Caucasian have grown up with more exposure to people of other races, through school, sports, dating and the media.

47. If we could shrink the earth's population (approximately 6.5 billion) to a village of precisely 100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following. There would be: 57 Asians 21 Europeans 14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south 8 Africans 52 would be female and 48 would be male 70 would be non-Caucasian and 30 would be Caucasian 70 would be non-Christian and 30 would be Christian 89 would be heterosexual and 11 would be homosexual 6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth and all 6 would be from the U.S.80 would live in substandard housing and 70 would be unable to read 50 would suffer from malnutrition, 1 would be near death, and 1 would be near birth 1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education and 1 would own a computer When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding, and education becomes glaringly apparent. Our Global Village

48. Respecting the Values and Beliefs of People Who Are of a Different Race or Culture Than I Am… 1 = Not at all like me. 2 = A little like me. 3 = Somewhat like me. 4 = Quite like me. 5 = Very much like me. Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

49. Knowing A Lot About People Who Are of a Different Race Than I Am 1 = Not at all like me. 2 = A little like me. 3 = Somewhat like me. 4 = Quite like me. 5 = Very much like me. Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006

50. Enjoying Being With People Who Are of a Different Race Than I Am 1 = Not at all like me. 2 = A little like me. 3 = Somewhat like me. 4 = Quite like me. 5 = Very much like me. Source: Search Institute Student Profiles of Life Survey, 2006