MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage

1. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage

2. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage Big Questions… How Do I Meet The Right Person? Do I Need To Meet The Right Person Is My Wife/Husband The Right Person Why should we involve God in our dating or in our choice of a marriage partner? Why should we turn to Christian principles to help us find the man or woman of our dreams?

3. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms Arkansas Gazette, Feb.1841-WIFE WANTED:Any gal that’s got a bed, calico dress, coffee pot and skillet, knows how to cut out britches and can make a hunting shirt, knows how to take care of children can have my services till death do us part. http://www.oldstatehouse.com/pdf/Vol%205_Spring%2086.pdf

4. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms Waterloo, Iowa, newspaper in 1860 “A young lady residing in one of the small towns of Central New York, is desirous of opening a correspondence with some young man in the West, with a view to a matrimonial engagement . . . She is about 24 years of age, possesses a good moral character, is not what would be called handsome, has a good disposition, enjoys good health, is tolerably well-educated, and thoroughly versed in the mysteries of house-keeping.” A History of the Wife, Marilyn Yalom, page 209.

5. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms • Early 1900s: History Of Courting and Dating • Among the poor: many began living in city apartments or smaller homes without parlors leading the courtship from the home to public gatherings. • The rich liked the idea of “going out” and began following this “exciting” public courtship custom. • These “public” outings also lead to private getaways… and sexual encounters.

6. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms “This experimentation (public dating, MD) developed out of a need of sexual fulfillment during marriage. One requirement was, though, that the woman only have sexual relations with the man she intended to marry (Cate & Lloyd, 1992).” “Today, adolescents consider dating to be a fun activity that is not so much delegated by authority figures. Young adolescents often “date” in the sense of becoming boyfriend and girlfriend and these relationships are usually short in duration (Feiring, 1996). These relationships are also frequently intense emotionally in that the couple will see and talk to each other daily.”

7. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms Difficulties with Today’s Dating Scene 1. Intimacy without commitment. - Rom. 7:2-3; 1 Cor. 7:39 2. Constant breaking of relationships (and hearts) not necessarily a healthy pattern for commitment. 3. Temptations for couples left alone. 2 Tim. 2:22 4. Fixation/Obsession

8. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage 1. Hollywood 2. Societal Norms 3. God Gen. 2:18, It is not good that the man should be alone. Gen. 24:67, …and she became his wife, and he loved her. Psa. 32:8- I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;  I will counsel you with my eye upon you. James 1:5- If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.

9. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage I. Mission Minded- Eph. 2:1-10

10. 1 And you were dead in the trespasses and sins 2 in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— 3 among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. 4 But God, beingrich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, 5 even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— 6 and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been savedthrough faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast.  10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2

11. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage • I. Mission Minded- Eph. 2:1-10 • We find fulfillment in our relationship with God. • Our focus becomes doing the work God has prepared for us • As we go about this work we might eventually notice someone working • We have an opportunity to meet a Christian on a mission! - 1 Corinthians 7: 32-35

12. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage * Not everyone will get married...but all Christians are on a mission. This is the most important thing!!!

13. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage I. Mission Minded- Eph. 2:1-10 II. The Triangle Effect- Ruth 2:3-16

14. God Him Her

15. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage • I. Mission Minded- Eph. 2:1-10 • II. The Triangle Effect- Ruth 2:3-16 • Where was their focus? V.1-4 • If you put yourself in the right places...you will meet the right people. V.5-7 • His ____ + Her ____= Closer To God. V.8-10 • His Awareness Of Her _____ + Her Awareness Of His ______= Closer To God. V.11-13 • Where It Started…..Great Grandparents Of David... 30x Grandparents Of Jesus- v.14

16. MISSION MINDED Dating & Marriage * Dating/Marriage is the process of helping one another fall more in love with Christ, as you fall more in love with each other