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Sex and Relationships

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  1. Sex and Relationships A positive Christian Vision By Fr Dan Benedetti mgl

  2. That little word “sex” • What do we mean when we talk about sex • Sexual Intercourse • Sexuality/Sexual identity/Gender • Sexual Intercourse isn’t just a physical action, its a way of communicating/a language

  3. A Positive Christian Vision • Conceived & Born “sexy” • Deeply part of my identity: show baby pic • Mystery: physical, psych, spiritual • I cannot be human without being sexual • Created in the image and likeness of God (Gen 1) • Is God sexual? Yes! God is sex to the max! • God created it, it is good and beautiful

  4. Continued... • Gen 2: the original WOW; man looks upon the woman, mutual attraction, search for intimacy/union; complementarity; gift of sexual urge • Naked without shame: my body is a symbol of spirit • When man decided to turn away from God it began a destructive cycle includes the abusing of sexuality • Sex(uality) is sacred; “Body is a temple of the Holy Spirit”, powerful, fragile • All called to Chastity: “The right ordering of our sexuality acc to state of life (Married, Single, Celibate)

  5. Sex is for marriage • God has a plan: “Life to the Full!” • The bond/union of marriage • Vows: I give myself to you completely, forever (with God’s help!) • Every sacrament has “words” and “actions”: vows and intercourse (sign of the vows) • Joy of physical/spiritual/psych intimacy AND the openness to conception (children)

  6. Some of Aussie society’s messages • Nike philosophy: just do it • If it feels good do it, as long as I don’t hurt anyone • If can do it, do it: Matthew Johns & sport culture • Everybody’s doing it; everyone on TVs is doing it • Sex before marriage is ok (even healthy), masturbation and porn is normal and to be encouraged • Got to look sexy/beautiful (Dove video) • “Safe sex, no regrets”: false sense of security (ad campaign)

  7. Some consequences... • Devaluing of Sexual Intercourse as a special gift to a special person. Then we ourselves are devalued. • Sex used to make money • Lack of trust, sex not a sign of our commitment but just a fun thing to do (Leunig pic) • Use the power of my sexuality to use or manipulate others: person becomes an object • “Up the ante”: people not satisfied with “normal” intercourse, all sorts of strange activities, even child porn, child sexual abuse and bestiality; sex therapists

  8. Whose voices are you hearing? • No matter if we realize it or not we are all being shaped/taught/formed by people and groups... • Media: TV, movies, internet... • Social scene: friends, parties, school... • What about God? Parents? Older people? Church teaching? Professionals? Strong Christian friends • Movements: Chastity ring; True Love Waits (Jason Stevens)...

  9. Called to Love • What does it mean to really love someone? • Sex should be about loving, respecting and thinking about the other person • Learn about who we are as adults and how we can make good decisions about sexual situations • Teenage life is about exploration but that can be dangerous (sexual experience too early can hurt) • Men are generally more aroused by sight, women by touch • God is there with mercy, encouragement, healing, vision for the future: desire to become a mature christian man or woman

  10. 5 love languages • So many ways to love! • 1. Affirmation • 2. Physical touch • 3. Quality time • 4. Acts of Service • 5. Giving/receiving Gifts • Some people have one or more of these as their dominant way of loving