Relational Cultural Theory: Connections and Conversations in Healing

1. Relational Cultural Theory: Connections and Conversations in Healing Michelle Wilson North Dakota State University Counselor Education

2. Focus of Relational Cultural Theory (RCT) • Humans grow through and toward connection throughout the lifespan and culture has a huge impact on that relationship • Neurologically wired for connection • Majority of literature is geared towards people without developmental disorders (Autism, Asperger's)

3. Focus of RCT • Disconnection can occur at a social, cultural and systemic level • Relationships that lack authenticity and mutuality can also facilitate disconnection

4. Theoretical Underpinnings • Developmental in that connections are an on-going, circular, and paramount part of our development process. • Feminist and Multiculturallyinformed in that disconnections can occur at a personal or societal level, both playing an important role in how people begin to understand relationships and connections • Calls on neurological research to state unequivocally that we are very literally, hard wired for connections. (Banks, 2011) • Humanistic in that great attention is paid to cultivating meaning through the course of development • Constructivist in that there is no “reality” but rather experiences perceived by other people

5. Theoretical Underpinnings RCT

6. Theoretical Development • Roots of RCT emerged at the time of Gilligan, Chodorow, as well as Miller and her colleagues (Stiver, Surrey,) began to ask if the way women’s development and identity was accurate • Gilligan, came about as a response to Kohlberg’s theory of Moral Development. She maintained the theory presented women as deficient • Chodorow reexamined object relations theory to note that women and girls had profoundly different relational expectations with mothers than boys and men. Thus leading to differences in identity and developmental expectations.

7. Theoretical Development • Towards a New Psychology of Women (1976) written by Jean Baker Miller • Suggested that women develop through relationships • Stated that the model of self- sufficiency did not match the strengths or experiences of women

8. Major Focus • “This goes beyond saying that women value relationships; we are suggesting that the deepest sense of one’s being is continuously formed in connection with others and is inextricably tied to relational movement. The primary feature, rather than structure marked by separateness and autonomy is increasing empathy responsiveness in the context of interpersonal mutuality.” (Jordan, 1997, p.15)

9. Key Concepts • People grow through and toward relationship throughout lifespan • Movement toward mutuality rather than movement toward separation characterizes mature functioning • Authenticity is necessary for real engagement and full participation in growth fostering relationships. • In growth fostering relationships, all people contribute—development is not a one way street.

10. Key Terms

11. Key Concepts Social Pain Overlap Theory (SPOT Theory) • Grounded in the work of Eisenger and Leiberman, Banks (2011) puts it in the context of RCT • Indicates that the brain does not differentiate between social and physical pain People are hardwired to connect to others • When exclusion occurs, the brain responds to the stress in the same way it responds to physical pain • Autonomic nervous system responses can result in anxiety, vigilance, sleeplessness over time

12. Disconnections have occurred for someone in a relationship where mutuality and mutual do not occur Looks like disappointment, isolation, and sometimes danger Key Terms

13. Key Terms • Chronic Disconnection takes place when there are repeated disconnections in the context of relationship. • Connected to power within the relationship • Leads to strategies to twist and fit into a disconnected relationship

14. Key Terms • Strategies of Disconnection are methods used to protect relationships but avoid authenticity. • Central Relational Paradox occurs when repeated disconnection results in a habit of keeping parts of themselves out of relationships in order to avoid further disconnection and salvage any remnant of relationship that does exist.

15. Key Terms • The cycle starts with disconnection and facilitates further disconnection

16. Therapeutic Process • “The quality of responsive presence on the part of the therapist is one of the defining features of RCT therapy. RCT therapy is largely based on a change in attitude and understanding rather than set of techniques.” (Jordan, 2010, p.5)

17. Therapeutic Process • Radical RespectA deep appreciation based on empathy for the other person's current functioning and for the context within which her or his suffering arose; an equally deep appreciation for her or his coping methods, survival strategies, and the inner wisdom that sought to keep her or him alive. • Precedes a counseling relationship,, it is not earned through trust. It is brought by the counselor. • Serves as the foundation for the counseling relationship

18. Therapeutic Process • Radical Respect changes the framework of how a counselor understands a clients behavior • Defensiveness, lateness, can be viewed as mechanisms of protection that have served the client well

19. Therapeutic Process • Radical Respect also serves to facilitate self empathy, the initial task for many RCT practitioners • Shame management • Forgiveness of Self • Enhancing self empathy allows people to fully participate in relationships, thus bring them closer to mutuality and vulnerability

20. Therapeutic Process • Relational Images are inner pictures of a person’s experiences in relationships • Understanding relational images is an essential task in RCT

21. Therapeutic Process • Discrepant Relational ImagesRelational images that contradict the negative dominant and fixed images that keep people locked in disconnection; expansion of these images leads to changes in the dominant relational expectation. • The counselor seeks to expand those images leading to relational resilience even in the face of adverse conditions.

22. Therapeutic Process • RCT does not dispute the existence of pathology • Avoids placing too much power in labels • Opts to place experience in a larger context of development, social, cultural realities. • Leaves room for pharmaceutical support in order to manage systems

23. Therapeutic Process • Corrective Relational Response • Occurs as the result of counselor and client coming to an impasse, or conflict • Counselor responds with authenticity • Thus facilitating a strengthened relationship and potentially serving to cultivate further mutuality

24. Therapeutic process Relational Resilience Authenticity

25. Therapeutic Process Boundaries look differently in RCT than other counseling theories • Deviates from the model of separation • Lawler(2004) maintains boundaries exist to hold the relationship as opposed to limit it. • Part of establishing boundaries is to move from power over to power with • Create a safe space for mutuality to exist, while still communicating ethical and safety expectations

26. Therapeutic Process • Surrey (1991) cites 3 necessary questions to evaluate boundaries • What is the potential impact of the practice on the client, the therapist, and the relationship? • Will the Behavior move the relationship toward expanded connection, either by increasing the likelihood of empathetic joining or by encouraging the client to embrace a challenge? • How does the practice affect the therapists ability to be present to, and responsive in, relationship?

27. Therapeutic Process • RCT does not deny the existence of Power Differential • Must be acknowledged in order to facilitate relational movement towards mutuality • Mencher (1997) client may be the expert on the realities of their problems and thereby the solutions

28. Therapeutic Process • Counselors who hold a place in a minority group will sometimes need to navigate community and professional obligation • Unilateral expectation that counselors still hold ethical obligations to work within ethical guidelines • Mencher (1997) maintains within Lesbian community it is a matter of acknowledging a dual contact relationship and still staying within professional guidelines

29. Therapeutic Process • RCT asks its counselors to be highly aware of their own social, cultural, and developmental ideas • Relational Images • Familiarity with a particular issue still dictates awareness in the context of the connection • What will my challenges in this relationship? • Who am I and what will I become through this experience • How will I grow and change?

30. Therapeutic Process • Termination is not advocated in RCT • Crucial to maintain that connection • Case studies indicate this translates into a “Stop and Go” process • Matches RCT’s goals of on-going development/growth • Honors the sanctity of relationship between counselor and client as a space of healing

31. Limitations • Unlikely a stand alone theory • Would likely need to be combined with other techniques (SFBT, Narrative, Gestalt, DBT) • Difficult to practice • Calls for Counselors to be highly attentive, aware, and humble • Largely a theory of presence rather than techniques • Time Constraints • Limited literature on implementation of RCT in a brief context • Gender Issues • Seems possible that there will be other levels of complexity to attend to when counselor and client identify as different genders • Few case studies exist to demonstrate inter-gender work • Calls for very careful supervision, due to lack of manualiztion • Would be difficult to implement without collective practice of RCT

32. Applications

33. Short Term RCT • Jordan (2010) recommends beginning brief RCT with psychoeduction on the neurobiology of connection • Counselors can concentrate on 2 or 3 important relationships • This leads to a shift in the stiffness of these patterns • Can also alleviate some of the pervasiveness of the difficult relational patterns • Used with success in College Counseling Centers (Comstock, 2004) • Two year study by Ontario Women’s Health Council found 6 months of RCT counseling improved significantly on all outcome measures and were sustained for 6 months (Jordan, 2010)

34. References • Baker Miller, J. (1976). Towards a new psychology of women. Boston, MA: Beacon Press. • Banks, A. (2011).Developing the Capacity to Connect. Journal Of Religion & Science, 46(1), 168-182. • Comstock, D. (2004). Reflections of life, loss, and resilience. In M. Walker & W. Rosen (Eds.), How Connection Heal: Stories from Relational Cultural Therapy (pp. 83-102). New York: • Glossary of relational-cultural theory--key terms. (2012). Retrieved from http://www.jbmti.org/Our-Work/ glossary-relational-cultural-therapy

35. References • Jordan, J. V. (2010) Relational Cultural Therapy. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association. • Lawler, A. (2004) Caring but fallible: A story of repairing disconnection. In M. Walker & W. Rosen (Eds.), How Connection Heal: Stories from Relational Cultural Therapy (pp. 66-82). New York: • Mencher, J. (1997). The conundrum of mutuality: A lesbian dialouge. In J. Jordan (Ed.), Women's Growth In Diversity: More Writings from the Stone Center (pp. 107-136). New York: Guliford.

36. References • Surrey, J. (1991)What do you mean mutuality in therapy? Work in Progress, no. 49. Stone Center Working Paper Series