Chapter 14 Divorce and Remarriage

1. Chapter 14Divorce and Remarriage

2. Macro Factors Contributing to Divorce • Divorce: the termination of a valid marriage contract • Divorce occurs more frequently today than in the earlier days of the U.S. due to various structural and cultural factors.

3. Macro Factors • Changing family functions and structure • Liberal divorce laws • No-fault divorce: a divorce in which neither party is identified as the guilty party or the cause of the divorce • Prenuptial agreements • Fewer moral and religious sanctions

4. Macro Factors • More divorce models • Mobility and anonymity • Social class, ethnicity, and culture • Educated white Americans are the least likely to divorce

5. Micro Factors Contributing to Divorce • Micro factors are individual factors that are predictive of divorce. • More likely to be seen as the cause of the divorce

6. Micro Factors • Falling out of love • Not spending enough time together • Decreasing positive behaviors: compliments, physical affection • Having an affair • Poor conflict resolution skills • Changing values

7. Micro Factors • Satiation: habituation, the state in which a stimulus loses its value with repeated exposure • Believing life will be better if divorced

8. Ending Relationship • Psychological functioning and happiness of spouses going through a divorce improve after the divorce. • Data are mixed on whether remaining unhappily married or getting divorced and remarried has a more positive outcome for the spouses.

9. Gender Differences in Filing for Divorce • Women are the first to seek help when there is trouble in the relationship. • Women are likely to feel a renewed sense of self-identity. • Men are concerned about separation from their children.

10. Consequences for Spouses Who Divorce • The spouse who did not instigate the divorce is more vulnerable to depression. • Women fare better emotionally after a divorce. • Men are likely to date and remarry sooner. • Relationships with extended family change. • Spouses recover sooner if they find new interests.

11. Consequences • Both women and men experience a drop in income. • Women tend to suffer more financially. • Over half of custodial mothers are awarded child support but most find the amount inadequate.

12. Consequences • Divorced mothers serve as gatekeepers for the relationship children have with the father. • A father’s relationship with a daughter is usually more damaged than his relationship with a son. • Shared parenting dysfunction: refers to the set of behaviors on the part of each parent that are focused on hurting the other spouse

13. Consequences • Parental alienation syndrome: a disturbance in which children are obsessively preoccupied with deprecation or criticism of a parent • Parental alienation: an alliance between a parent and a child that isolates the other parent

14. Effects of Divorce on Children • Benefits of divorce for children • Better than living in high-conflict home • Learn resilience • Receive more attention • Negative outcomes of divorce for children • Less marital satisfaction • Poorer communication skills • Poorer parent-child relationships

15. Effects on Children • The primary factor that determines the effect of divorce on children is the degree to which the divorcing parents are civil or adversarial. • Legal and physical custody arrangements are also important.

16. Effects on Children • Legal custody: decisional authority over major issues involving the child • Physical custody: visitation, distribution of parenting time following divorce • Judges in all states are bound by the “best interests of the child.”

17. Prerequisites for Having a Successful Divorce • Mediate rather than litigate the divorce. • Divorce mediation: process in which divorcing parties make agreements with a third party about custody, visitation, child support, and property. • Coparent with your ex-spouse. • Take some responsibility for the divorce. • Learn from the divorce. • Create positive thoughts. • Avoid alcohol and other drugs. • Relax and exercise.

18. Successful Divorce • Let go of anger and have fun. • Continue interpersonal connections. • Allow time to heal.

19. Successful Divorce Psychological stages of divorce • Denial • Depression • Anger or ambivalence • New lifestyle and identity • Acceptance and integration

20. Stepfamilies • Blended family: a family in which new spouses have children from previous relationships • Binuclear family: a family that spans two households • Stepfamily: a family in which partners bring children from previous relationships into the new home

21. Stepfamilies Unique aspects of stepfamilies: • Children are biologically related to only one parent. • Stepfamily members have experienced loss. • Stepfamily members are connected to others outside their family unit. • Children may have two homes. • Stepfamilies have reduced disposable income.

22. Stepfamilies Unique aspects of stepfamilies • Step families are stigmatized by stepism: the assumption that stepfamilies are inferior. • Married couples begin their marriage with children in the home. • The law usually recognizes children of the first family.