Men Are Better Than Women (.com) By Emily Adler
Meet (the) Dick • Dick Masterson is the creator of menarebetterthanwomen.com, a “funny” website dedicated to trashing women and praising men. • I’ve got to hand it to him, he comes up with some pretty incredible arguments…let’s get inside Dick’s head.
Classic Dick: Why Women Hate Sex • They’re lousy at it—just look at their magazines! • ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’’ ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’ • Guys, it’s not your fault-Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you! • Women = walls • sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.
Every Woman is a Cheating Whore • Nothing like getting them on that treadmill! • Getting a woman to cheat is like getting a duck to eat bread-just toss it in front of their face • Fact: getting attention from men is a woman’s lifeblood. • + Fact: Men are too manly to let opportunities go to waste • = CHEATING!!!! • Men, be warned: they’re predators. Cheating is like getting pregnant: it’s 100% a woman’s fault 100% of the time.
Every Woman is a Cheating Whore, Cont. • Men, be warned: they’re predators! Like any virus, women are not content with ruining their own lives, no… • they seek out the lives of decent, honest men and tempt and corrupt them until they appear to be cheaters as. • Bottom line: cheating is like getting pregnant: it’s 100% a woman’s fault 100% of the time.
Feminism is a Business • Feminism is the idea that women should be treated like children. • Make that SPOILED children: Didn’t accomplish anything this time around, sweetheart? Take another shot after we bend the fuck out of the rules. • Women shouldn’t consider themselves happy unless they enjoy the same things men do at ten times the volume.
Feminism is a Business, Cont. • Ever seen a woman pretend to like business or sports? • Can we all say “attention whore”? There isn’t a big screen on Earth that can drown out the “mating hoots” of a woman who’s convinced herself she likes basketball. • Forget business! Women like getting shit for free based on looks. • as long as feminism doesn’t teach that, it’s a scam and a con and a cult.
Pets Are Not Children • If men are dogs, then women are drunken parrots with The Home Shopping on speed dial. • That’s why men are better pet owners than women the only things women know how to do are squawk and peck. • 3 strikes and women are out!
Pets Are Not Children, Cont. • Strike 1: Women give a show-and-tell over their pet’s lifeline. • No one gives a shit if your cat turns purple in the winter! • Strike 2: Pets are not babies. • It hasn’t been brewing inside of you..get over it! • Strike 3: Women can’t take care of things as well as they complain about them.
Space…the Male Frontier • Wondering why women have never been to the moon? • Women ruin everything. • “those are fake”, “you only think you’re funny”, “cigarettes cause cancer” • That’s why women will never go to the moon, because of their piss-poor, wet-blanket attitudes.
Women Would Vote for Hitler • Women would vote for Hitler. • because women are all fascists • Marriage is a fascist dictatorship of oppression • so is any relationship with a woman • Disagree? Prepare for assault and oppression and withheld sex • Hitler pulled the same bullshit
Top 10 Reasons MABTW • 10. Men do not have Tourettes Syndrome • 9. Men are not sponges • Women are social vampires • 8. Women are racists • They hate everything but do nothing
Top 10, Cont. • 7. Men live less than women • Burn out faster but set the night ablaze w/ manness • 6. Men write illegibly Writing is stupid • 5. Jesus was a man • 4. Men wear watches • ‘Move your man ass and take care of your fucking man business!’
Top 10, Cont. • 3. Boys destroy things (paper, power) • We pop out of the man-womb and start tearing down the Earth with our mighty, man-manly man-fists. • 2. Marriage is stupid • and 100% the fault of women • 1. Men have penises • ‘Hey. Look at me. I’m a man. I won’t fuck up whatever it is that you’re trying to do.’
Isn’t He Awesome???? • Thanks for enduring that guys!!! • All views in the powerpoint were 100% pasted or paraphrased from Dick’s site • So please don’t hate me!!