F.O.R.E.S.T Freedom Organisation for the Right to Enjoy Smoking Tobacco (No, I haven’t made it up) www.forest-on-smoking.org.uk Aaaaah, Bisto, I mean, Aaaaah, nicotine!
What Ever Happened To Human Rights? • Smokers get forced in to the cold, rain, sleet and snow from many restaurants, theatres, cafes, hotels, even places of work, and are left suffering on public transport! They’re Bloody Nazi’s NO SOPHIEYOU CANT HAVEA FAG
WAKE UP GAZELE! Who can honestly say they enjoy using public transport? Well its worse for smoker’s who are even more stressed because they can’t spark up! Planes are just as bad, I had to sit on an 8 hour flight to America without smoking 1 single cigarette, yet carrying 400 Bensons in my hand luggage. (In the end I went for a sly one in the toilets, armed with a bottle of industrial-sized Fabreze) - and you wonder why people break this no-smoking rule? Because it takes the friggin XXXX! But no, we have to go and stand in the cold in the interests of non-smoker’s human bloody rights? What about ours? Which leads me on to my next point……….
NO ARGUING UNTIL I’M DONE SARAH Non-smokers are SELFISH. Smokers are more than willing to think about non-smokers, we ask before lighting up, and have no problem with opening windows, or investing in modern air cleaning systems, if it means we get to stay in the warm and allows us to chat to our non-smoking friends as well as our smoking friends! The good old days when you could smoke at work We understand that a smokey environment can irritate some, we do not expect to be able to smoke where and when we want, but neither do we have to put up with UNFAIR DISCRIMINATION and SOCIAL ENGINEERING which constantly tries to force smokers in to giving up. We are treated as if smoking is illegal! Well, it’s not, so LEAVE US ALONE!
Smokers are accused of damaging non-smokers health through passive smoking, a theory that has been around since 1975 yet has never been proven! SOD IT! I CANT PROVE A XXXXX THING! In fact, in 1998, the increased risk of non-smokers getting lung cancer due to passive smoking was declared “statistically insignificant” by the World Health Organisation!
Stop doing your make up Ally, oh XXXX, that’s me... And another thing……….. Hereditary peer? Yeah, great, cheers Dad Thanks to us smoker’s you pay less tax. Smoker’s pay £millions in tax alone, and if the government didn’t have cigarettes as a way of ripping people off, they would put taxes up on other things, maybe even essentials like petrol. They may even try to bring back tax on sanitary products such as tampons, (which I think you’ll agree is CRIMINAL).
A SPECIAL NOTE FOR PJ! Before you say it, there is nothing wrong with kissing a smoker, it is not like kissing an ashtray because there is no ash involved. It is actually quite good, it’s like having a fag without the risk of lung cancer. Don’t argue, that’s my FINAL word on the subject!
This debate is not just about health issues, it is about COMMON sense, COMMON courtesy and reaching COMMON ground, it is about individual’s responsibility as a citizen, and their freedom to live without UNFAIR restrictions on their personal choices, (so long as they are prepared to take the consequences of their actions). THANK YOU! P.S. When we light up, it makes us happy, do not ruin that happiness by lecturing us on the early death we will have, we are well aware of the fact and do not need reminding