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From Warts to Wings: Helping Young People Live Healthier and Happier Lives

From Warts to Wings: Helping Young People Live Healthier and Happier Lives. John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D. Department of Counselor Education University of Montana John.sf@mso.umt.edu. Today’s Plan. T hanks to Danya Perry and Communities in Schools of NC

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From Warts to Wings: Helping Young People Live Healthier and Happier Lives

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  1. From Warts to Wings: Helping Young People Live Healthier and Happier Lives John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D. Department of Counselor Education University of Montana John.sf@mso.umt.edu

  2. Today’s Plan • Thanks to Danya Perry and Communities in Schools of NC • Articulate 10 key principles and strategies of human change that you can use immediately in your work with students and parents • Organized by chapter: Each chapter has a story, a cartoon, and a concluding principle

  3. Introduction Just be Inspirational and Funny While Offering Concrete Tips and Strategies

  4. The Principle Expectations can create positive transformations or cause frustration and misery – Manage your expectations or they’ll manage you

  5. Chapter One: Two Wolves

  6. The Principle Feed the empathic, generous, and benevolent side of yourself; be aware of and let go of your less desirable thoughts and impulses

  7. Chapter Two: Emma the Great

  8. The Principle Use passionate rewards and boring consequences (and avoid backward behavior modification)

  9. Chapter Three:The Satanic Golden Rule

  10. The Principle Create your own positive respect bubble . . . and watch out for the REVENGE IMPULSE

  11. Chapter Four: The Cherry Story

  12. The Principle It’s not what happens to us . . . But what we think about what happens to us . . . That causes us misery

  13. Chapter Five: Powers of Mind

  14. The Principle Use the power of your mind to creatively and relentlessly focus on your goals

  15. Chapter Six: Twenty Minutes

  16. The Principle Allow children freedom and then learn from making gentle observations

  17. Chapter Seven: Meeting Jesus at the Portland VA Hospital

  18. The Principle If you want genuine cooperation Be less threatening

  19. Chapter Eight: “I Think She Likes to Yell”

  20. The Principle Collaborate Work WITH your spouse, partner, or teacher

  21. Chapter Nine: Learning to Growl

  22. The Principle Change is easier if you make a good plan

  23. Chapter Ten: That Dog Don’t Hunt

  24. The Principle Love can overshadow our own unique faults or warts

  25. Summary and Conclusions • Manage your expectations • Be aware of and let go of less desirable thoughts • Use passionate rewards and boring consequences • Create your own respect bubble; and watch out for revenge • It’s not what happens to you . . . but what you think . . . • Use the power of mind to focus on your goals • Learn from gentle observation • Be less threatening • Collaborate: Work WITH your spouse, partner, or teacher • Make an new plan • We all have warts and, if we’re lucky, we might find a wing in there somewhere too

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