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Friendship, Love, and Intimacy. Intimacy. Closeness between two individuals Not the same thing as being intimate. Is an emotional state, rather than a physical one. Four Key Features of Intimacy Hook (2003). Love and/or affection Personal validation Trust Self-disclosure

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intimacy
Intimacy
  • Closeness between two individuals
    • Not the same thing as being intimate.
    • Is an emotional state, rather than a physical one
four key features of intimacy hook 2003
Four Key Features of IntimacyHook (2003)
            • Love and/or affection
            • Personal validation
            • Trust
            • Self-disclosure
  • How do we Express intimacy?
friendship
Friendship
  • What is friendship?
  • What qualities do you look for in a friend?
  • Describe how intimacy, friendship, and love are related.
what is love
What is LOVE?
  • How do you define love?
  • Where/When/How have you experienced it?
        • Binds us together
        • A feeling and an activity
love vs infatuation
Love vs. Infatuation

Love

Pride and Prejudice

Infatuation

The Notebook

  • Trust
  • Caring
  • Honesty
  • Friendship
  • Respect
  • Concern for other’s well-being
  • Loyalty
  • Commitment
  • Acceptance of the other
  • Supportive
  • Wanting to be with other
  • Interest in the other
  • Develops rather rapidly
  • Based on limited characteristics
  • Based on the emotion itself
  • Is self-centered
  • Is multi-person centered
  • Changes rapidly
  • Loses touch with reality
  • Largely outward or physical
  • Insecure/Insecurities
  • Jealous/Possessiveness
  • http://www.buzzle.com/articles/love-versus-infatuation-how-to-determine-whether-you-love-him-idea.html
the top 10 love myths
The Top 10 Love Myths
  • 1. Love conquers all.
  • 2. If it is true love, you'll know it the instant you meet that person.
  • 3. There is only one true love in the world for you.
  • 4. Your soul mate will fulfill you in every way.
  • 5. When you experience powerful sexual chemistry, it must be love.
  • 6. A fun date, makes a great marriage partner.
  • 7. A couple must be a mirror image of each other for a relationship to work.
  • 8. Love means never having to say you're sorry.
  • 9. Love is a bed of roses.
  • 10. True love feels good always.
        • Linda Lovejoy, MA, LMHC, Masters in Counseling, Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Teleclass Leader, Columnist, Life and Relationship Coach
lee s six styles of love
Lee’s six styles of love

Primary styles

Secondary styles

  • Eros
    • (romantic/passionate)
  • Ludus
    • (playful/game-playing)
  • Storge
    • (companionate/friendship)
  • Mania
    • (l+e= obsessive; love-hate)
  • Agape
    • (e+s= altruistic)
  • Pragma
    • (s+l= practical/pragmatic)
unrequited love
Unrequited Love
  • The Cyrano Style
  • The Giselle Style
  • The Don Quixote Style
stalking
Stalking
  • Multiple Definitions
  • US Bureau of Justice Statistics
      • About half (46%) of stalking victims experienced at least one unwanted contact per week, and 11% of victims said they had been stalked for 5 years or more.
      • Approximately 1 in 4 stalking victims reported some form of cyberstalking such as e-mail (83%) or instant messaging (35%).
      • Women were at greater risk than men for stalking victimization; however, women and men were equally likely to experience harassment.

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/abstract/svus.htm

the 2000 national college women sexual victimization survey found the following results
The 2000 National College Women Sexual Victimization Survey found the following results:
  • 13% of the college women had been stalked since the school year began
  • 80.3% of victims knew or had seen their stalker before
  • 42.4% of stalkers were ex-boyfriends of the victim.
  • In 15.3% of incidents, the victim reported that the stalker either threatened or attempted to harm them.
  • Overall, 83.1% of stalking incidents were NOT reported to police or campus law enforcement.
  • 93.4% of victims confided in someone, most often a friend, that they were being stalked.

http://www.umich.edu/~sapac/info/stats-stalking.html

types of stalking
Types of Stalking
  • Erotomania
  • Simple obsessional stalking
  • Love-obsessional stalking