Preparing children sexually

1. Preparing children sexually

2. Go around and hug everybody in this room.

3. What is your response? • Child playing with his genitals. • Child looks at an bra ad and ask what is she wearing? • When watching TV with Child – an intimate kissing scene comes up? • Your child tells you today “one child removed his pants in the class and something was hanging out? Why it does not hang out from my body?” • Child asks – “What is Rape”? • Child does not ask such question

4. Motivation Beliefs Feelings Empower Creativity Self Esteem Habits of mind Multiple Intelligences Behaviour

5. Is this your response? • Scold the child? • Avoid answering? • Wish child had not asked? • Change channel / topic?

6. So what do these responses do to the child? • I am bad • It’s wrong to discuss such things with YOU …………… Its eembarrassing • There is something SPECIAL about it • You don’t want to talk about it - so WHY to bother. Avoid/ Ignore

7. It has to begin with you……

8. Sex education is more about beliefs than actual information. Our Beliefs

9. 1 Give the Vocabulary It is not ‘something’ – it has a name: “penis”, “vagina”

10. 2 Functions of ALL body parts The function of Urination does not make Vagina or Penis DIRTY.

11. 3 Awareness • Public body parts v/s Private body parts • Public and Private (body) actions

12. 4 Sensitize • Good touch, Bad touch • Sexual touch

13. Let us begin………. • Body Education • Give right vocabulary • Correct function of body parts • Private and public body parts • Private and public actions • Sensitize – Good touch, bad touch

14. Why Body Education ? • Nothing is dirty or bad. ALL parts of their body are good. • It will help make it easier for them to come to you when they have questions. • You be the FIRST to give them information. Easy to talk about BODY when they grow. • Children need to feel good about themselves, whether they are boys or girls.

15. Break your own barrier “What you believe, what you feel and what you say, do, and ‘not do’ - will have an impact on your children's sexual life”

16. So, lets see what we can do (role play) You find your child and his friend (both 7 years) are naked and playing with reach other’s body parts

17. Sexual Behavior - Pre Primary • Exploring private body parts. • Touch and play with them. • Interest in the physicalcharacteristics of the opposite sex. • Undressing with another preschooler and ‘playing doctor’ together. • Wondering where babies come from. Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and society

18. Sexual Behavior - Primary • Modest and conscious • Kissing games and marriage pretend-play. • Babies come from? • Sex play; ‘playing doctor’ • Curious about gender differences, sexual intercourse and pregnancy Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and society

19. Puberty • Physical Changes Girls • Physical changes – Boys Also……….. • Emotional changes • Your thinking will change • Your relationship with your parents

20. Sex Education - Socio - Emotional • Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” • Boy friends and Girl friends • Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes. • Media stereotypes

21. Sex education – Social • Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. • Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs • Fatigue Syndrome, Depression, • Violent media, Pornography • Responsible sexual behaviour • Media stereotypes

22. If you are late………. Start NOW – Talk about the BODY education and then move to …………

23. Benefits • You be the FIRST to inform • You are approachable • Your family values • Healthy relationship

24. So, lets see what we can do (role play)

25. So, lets see what we can do (role play) You child comes and tells you that a adult relative of yours has been fondling with his/her genitals

26. Sexual Abuse • Listen – completely without any judgement • Empathize with child’s emotions • If required express your emotions (only emotions) • Assure its not child’s mistake • State that whatever maybe you are with the child • Ask child for opinions and options • Establish that saying NO to anybody is FINE • Discuss more options • Reiterate you are always THERE

27. Guidelines • Check your own beliefs • Make it a regular topic • Mark it important • Be open & relaxed when talking about sex • If not, tell that child that you’re not comfortable • Don’t react - Understand the ACTION • Do not give wrong or fanciful information • Educate yourself • Use books, articles or videos, youth websites that can help. You could suggest someone you both trust as a good person for your son or daughter to talk with. • A hysterical response will probably guarantee your child may never risk asking you anything about sex again

28. TOOLS • Role plays • Puppets • Casual Discussions • Books • Draw pictures • Yoga – Body Awareness

29. Jagriti • Remember sex is a natural and biological motivation • Check your own beliefs • Empathise with child feelings. Express yours. • Remember your response will determine how the child will think about himself or herself • Empower the child to face sexual situations • Child is creative enough to create own understanding; Be creative in how you show your points / concerns • Awarenessthen understanding. Strategies they can create themselves. • Use Multiple ways to reach to the child - draw, role play, discuss, songs, give data about abuse, • Sex is natural behaviour and in most cases the intention is to enjoy oneself. • Prepare the child mentally, emotionally, socially and sexually. Learn from life for life.

30. Hope you enjoyed our bouquet of 10 flowers Thank you for starting this journey with us

31. Complete Sex education

32. There is an age Responsibility of school. They will undesrtand as they grow Sex eductaion – only means menstruation (girls), penis, hair growth (boys) and biology of sex. Touching genitals is not normal – harmful for growth. It distracts from studies. Talk about sex issues - kids will become sexually active. Its okay to say “God put baby in mummy’s tummy” – kids will not understand the facts. Only mothers should talk to girls and fathers talk to son. Boys do not need to know about periods and Girls do not need to know about wet dreams. Myths - Sex Education

33. New Perspectives • No age - Talking with your children about their bodies is easier if you start when they are very young. • Not only school - Home plays a major role • Sex education is as important as maths or engilish or sports • Not only biology - Complete education to all the genders. • Sex play – normal. It can be soothing. • Talking early about sex - will help make it easier for them to come to you when they have questions. • They will understand - You give factual and age appropriate information. • Both parenst talk – bonds the family • Well informed kids behave sexually responsibly.

34. Sex education - 1 • Body education • Awareness - Good touch, bad touch, sexual touch • Awareness of Abuse – physical, emotional and sexual • Empower at home • Sexual behaviour of pre-primary and primary children.

35. Sex education – 2 • Puberty Changes – hormones, feelings, body appearance • Changes with teenage – like Acne, hair growth, skin change • Do boys have Breast? • Breast and size

36. Sex education - 3 • Boy friends and Girl friends • Menstruation – When do periods starts and stops, Accidents like blood stains, Exercise and periods, Mood swings, Cramps, Pimples and periods, Light and heavy periods. • Wet dreams, Erections, Hair and skin • Hair growth – shaving, waxing, • Sexual feelings – attraction for opposite or same sex, crushes

37. Sex education - 4 • Myths related to “How to behave like a man and a woman” • Reproduction, Pregnancy • Homo sexuality, Premarital sex. • Condoms, birth control, contraception, unplanned pregnancy, Abortion • Sex diseases and STD (sexually transmitted diseases), Infections like Urine infection

38. Sex education – 5 • Alcohol, Smoking, Drugs • Fatique Syndrome, Depression, • Violent media, Pronography • Responsible sexual behaviour

39. Skills develop • Being able to communicate, • Be aware • Decision-making • Seek help from adults - including parents, carers and professionals. • Be able to differentiate between accurate and inaccurate information, • Discuss a range of moral and social issues and perspectives on sex and sexuality, including different cultural attitudes and sensitive issues like sexuality, abortion and contraception.

40. HOW ?

41. How to answer? • Think honestly what you think about the questions • Check your beliefs • Express your thought • Give appropriate and factual information • Ask and respect child’s opinion “Children need most of all to feel loved and lovable”

42. Playing Doctor - You see your young child undressing and playing doctor with another friend at home. FACTS: • It is Natural and Normal • Does not mean the same as it does for adults. • If you stop – they hide

43. Playing Doctor - YOUR ACTION: • Do not act in horror or scream or punish. • Remind them about • My body – other cannot touch – only you can touch • Private and public body parts • Private and public actions • Give them options – put your clothes and play same game (if they are playing family, doctor) or any other game • If books are handy – read one for them • Take it easy - remind yourself it is natural

44. Your young child likes to touch your private body parts. Facts: Exploration, Curious, Not a sexual act Your action – Role play • My body – your body • My feelings • Give option

45. Two friends taking bath together or sleep in the night FACTS: Enjoyment Your Action • Prepare them • Awareness of My Body • Empower to say NO • Ask their opinion

46. Your child playing and rubbing genitals in the night and enjoying. Facts: Natural, Soothing Your Action • Accept • Private and Public action • My Body

47. How does baby come in Mummy’s Tummy ? • Avoid fanciful explanations • Keep your answers simple. • Baby grows in mummy’s tummy’. • Created from a sperm from their Dad and an egg from their Mum. Grow in mummy’s organ called Utreus. • Sperm comes from Dad's penis and the egg from Mum's ovaries. • Your own pregnancy, the pregnancy of a friend or even pets giving birth. • Your Family Values

48. Your young child likes to touch your private body parts. Facts: Exploration, Curious, Not a sexual act Your action – Role play • My body – your body • My feelings • Give option

49. THANK YOU Reach us – amable@amable.in Handouts - www.geniekids.com/sexeduho.html I can only show you the way, cannot make a way for you. Do support our endeavour to spread awareness about sex education by helping us conduct these kinds of workshops in more schools, apartment complexes and companies.