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R.A.M. Relationship Attachment Model. "When you're comfortable with someone you love, the silence is the best." - Britney Spears. Britney & K-Fed. 2004 April: Meet and go to Europe together Meanwhile, Shar Jackson pregnant with their 2 nd child June: Britney proposes Sept: Marry 2005

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r a m

R.A.M

Relationship Attachment Model

britney k fed
Britney & K-Fed
  • 2004
    • April: Meet and go to Europe together
      • Meanwhile, Shar Jackson pregnant with their 2nd child
    • June: Britney proposes
    • Sept: Marry
  • 2005
    • Jan: Pregnant
  • 2006
    • Nov: Divorce
infatuation
Infatuation
  • Common during teen years
    • May lose appetite
    • Daydream – can’t concentrate
    • Start to ignore friends and spend all your time with that person
  • Grows rapidly-“love at first sight”
  • Often based on physical traits

or feelings

    • May find themselves bored

without physical stimulation

  • Selfish and possessive of the other person—jealousy
  • Easily influenced by the person they are infatuated with
common results
Common Results
  • Relationship stays the same for a long time (doesn’t go anywhere)
  • Disagreements common
  • Tend to ignore real problems and won’t acknowledge the other person’s weaknesses

Relationship doesn’t last over the long haul.

you gotta talk you gotta listen you gotta laugh rita wilson
"You gotta talk, you gotta listen, you gotta laugh!” - Rita Wilson
  • I feel very blessed to be married to an incredibly progressive man. He has never inhibited me from doing anything. He’s very secure. He celebrates other people’s success. That’s my philosophy, too.
  • We’ve been married for 21 years. In Hollywood, that’s big. But listen, Tom and I have a lot in common. People sometimes say, “I’m done being married.” We really wanted to be married.
  • We try to do little weekend trips, just the two of us. We definitely do date nights… I have to say this—he makes me laugh. That’s a big part of it. I make him laugh, too. Very early on, before we were married … we were in New York … holding hands. We were getting ready to cross the street. He said, “I just want you to know that you don’t have to change anything about who you are, or what you do, to be with me.” Women like hearing that from a guy.
timeline
Timeline
  • 1981
    • Met on show “Bosom Buddies”
  • 1985
    • Both casted in movie “Volunteers”
  • 1988
    • Marry
slide11
Love
  • Grows slowly, beginning with friendship
  • Involves the entire character and personality of the partner
  • More trust
  • Have more than just a physical relationship
  • Share common interests
  • Enjoy being together without need of expensive entertainment
results
Results
  • The relationship grows and matures as time passes
  • See life realistically
  • There is no rush to make decisions—the future is planned with confidence
  • Lasts over a long period of time