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Managing the Stress of the Holidays: Setting Boundaries to Maintain Wellness. Kenneth Zeigler, LCSW-C And Amy Price, LCPC October 22, 2009. What we will cover…. Defining boundaries Boundary-setting during the holidays Boundary-setting and self-awareness
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Kenneth Zeigler, LCSW-C
Amy Price, LCPC
October 22, 2009
Boundary-setting during the holidays
Boundary-setting and self-awareness
Practical tips for good boundary-setting
“A boundary is a limit or edge that defines you as separate from others” (Katherine, 1991, p. 14)
“Boundaries come in assorted shapes and sizes. They can be rigid like a brick wall or as flexible as a plastic bag, as impenetrable as a lead shield or as permeable as a chain-link fence” (Katherine, 1991, p. 20)
We feel selfish
Traditions are difficult to break
Often met with resistance
Holidays heighten tension
Tension increases stress
Stress increases struggles with boundary-setting
Is there another way?
Tension as a means to change
“Good boundaries enable us to define ourselves” (Katherine, 1991, p. 205)
They enable us to:
What stops us from setting boundaries?
“If you continue to tolerate behavior that is unacceptable to you, you are making a conscious decision to do so. You must make the choice to set boundaries” (Levang, 2009, p. 2).
1. Acknowledge feelings without judgment
2. Create a Plan
3. Accept change
4. Defer grievances “Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don’t live up to all your expectations” (Mayo Clinic, 2007, p. 3).
5. Be flexible
6. Don’t abandon healthy habits
7. Learn forgiveness
8. Celebrate your true meaning of the holiday season
9. Know what you want
10. Design an exit strategy
What can you take away from tonight?
Katherine, A. (1991). Where you end and I begin. New York: Simon and Schuster.
Levang, C. (2009). How to set boundaries with family and friends. Associated Content. www.associatedcontent.com
Mayo Clinic. (2007). Stress, depression and the holidays: 12 tips for coping.www.mayoclinic.com